To be a little fed up about maternity leave?

[georgie22]

I am not fed up per se as I have had fairly good maternity pay to 6 months and am now going on to SMP for 3 months. What does irritate me is that as working women we get nothing after 9 months - our mortgage, council tax etc. doesn't stop to account for a loss of one income within the household. I have been in the fortunate position to be able to plan for this but it does irritate me that some feckless individuals produce children and then have all their housing costs etc. paid for. It's just another example of how flawed the system is. Then when we return to work we have all the worries regarding childcare and juggling home and work life.

Are my current feelings justified or do I just have more time to dwell on things now? For what it's worth I would hate to be on benefits as I like earning my own money.

Thats the way I look at things Bubblecoral. I think everyone should have childcare help then more people could work rather than claiming as it's the 'easy' option. I'm not flaming people of benefits it's the whole system that is ludicris. If the government makes it so people are better off being on benefits than working of course people are going to abuse it.

Ok, so you are complaining about 6 months paid leave (statutory is 6 weeks by the way). How much leave would you like? A year? 2 years?

"People that can't afford to pay to house children and feed them without benefits, shouldn't be having children. And if they do, they should have help with childcare costs so that they can work, and nothing else."
The problem with this is it will result in children starving. Some parents will never spend money properly. The welfare state was designed to reduce extreme poverty. Unfortunately it can't prevent people being selfish idiots.

You're very lucky. I get 90% of my pay for 6 weeks and then SMP. Which is pretty shit seeing as I've worked here for over 2 years. If I was paid 6 months full pay I'd be very happy with that. YYBU

On these threads, no-one ever proposes any sort of practical alternative to the current system which, by no means perfect, does at least provide a small safety net for those who need it; and people who whinge always seem t know one person who is living the high life on benefits; (can I jut point out for once and all it is not possible to live entirely on IS, HB etc and spend a fortune on gadgets, holidays, luxury items,so if your SIL is doing so, OP, she either is racking up a fortune on provident or catalogues, or living with someone well off and claiming when she shouldn't be. Oh no, hang on, I forgot the alternative most propose is that some sort of selection process should be in place to decide who is allowed to have children.

VJ32, not if food vouchers were given instead of money just for having children.

People can be selfish and bad parents, but presumably if they were going to have to live in overcrowded conditions with nothing to spend except food and fuel vouchers, they wouldn't have children. Or they would work, and provide for their own children and stop expecting the taxpayer to fund their lazy self indulgent lifestyle.

Maybe if the government left benefits as they are for those that are already getting them, but announced that after January 2013, any babies concieved would not provide their parents with an entitlement to housing or free money, people would think twice before bringing children into the world that they can't afford.

But therein lies the problem Bubble, some children will still be born to parents who cannot or will not look after them. What then? Neglect and therefore punish the child for the 'sins' of the parents? Trust me, some of the kids I've worked with have horrible lives, I can only imagine how much worse they would be without any state help. (Yes, a few would be no different because their parents wouldn't necessarily spend any help on them.)

Ok Bubblecoral. In your brave new post 2013 world - what happens if someone who can't afford it has a baby, one of these lazy feckless workshy indviduals? and saying, "They should have thought about that first" is not an answer - what is physically done with that child? How is it fed?

x-post ith the more eloquent NinkyNonker

But there is already a high level of state help, and you still see children that live awful lives, so does it really make a difference? Would these children be better of in full time childcare so their parents can earn money to live in their own flat away from their other relatives or buy the luxury items they want? They may well be, and their neglect could be picked up sooner if they were in childcare.

I understand completely why OP find it frustrating that because she is choosing to work to provide for her children she gets no help with keeping a roof over her head or paying her council tax, but someone that doesn't work can get both. And they get all the time they want with their children. How can anyone possibly say that's right?

Pumpkin, I answered that. They get food and fuel vouchers and have to live with relatives. If they don't have relatives, then maybe some kind of centre where childcare is provided so they can work and save up for somewhere to live.

Wow, just wow.

It is a flawed and frustrating system sometimes, but I am glad we live in our society and not your's Bubble (said as a former higher rate taxpayer who has never needed benefits...touch wood).

Bring back the workhouses and homes for unmarried mothers eh!

YABU. I'm going to start my mat leave in 5 weeks time (can't wait) and I do appreiciate that money will be a bit tight

We do have a pretty good deal in this country compared to others places. SMP isn't much, but we have a much better deal than in say the US where I've heard they get 6 weeks. And that's it. The thought of having to return to work 6 weeks after giving birth (or less) makes me shudder.

My partner and I survived on benefits for 6 months with 4 kids. Survive is the right word, not live. No money for treats for the kids at all. We had enough to just about provide food, heat, electricity and clothes. No extra at all, and I'm not extravagant. There was no money for gadgets, believe me!

Just to clarify:

1. I haven't had full pay for 6 months although still had good maternity leave provision.
2. I was not referring solely to my personal position - I have made provision for unpaid leave. I was stating the situation for all working women, many of whom only get SMP.

I am uncertain how the mindset of people is changed to end the continuous cycle of dependence on benefits. Many young women have low or no ambition and therefore see no alternative to having children. Most working people make a decision on how many children they choose to have dependent on what they can afford; it's irresponsible to not consider this. I feel that if there were less dependence on the state then the available funds could be more fairly distributed eg. to ensure people do not lose their homes if they are made redundant, to sick and disabled people etc. The original aim of the welfare state was not what it has become for many people. There are generations of families who have never been in paid employment and now the proposal is that everyone receives a state pension of £155 per week, irrespective of their lifetime contribution of tax and NI. As someone else pointed out working to buy your own home and saving to support yourself is rewarded in old age by having to sell your home to pay for substandard care in a care home.

OMG, I had 6 weeks at 90% then the statutory 100 quid a week.

6 months on half pay would have been a dream come true - you honestly are damn lucky OP!

I would NEVER compare mat pay to benefits, they are there to support people who can not find work, lets hope you never need housing benefit or jobseekers allowance. yab VERY u!

I give up - I've said numerous times that I know I'm fortunate in my maternity leave provision. I was talking in general. If you ask most women on maternity leave, if money was not an issue, of course they would take 1 year off work, but for many maternity leave provision prohibits that.

i think people are saying YABU because you have had/got it a little better than most. If i had your maternity leav i would be happy. I dont see the point in moaning about everyone else.....enjoy what you have....as others have said, you have a job to go back to and a home to pass on to your children (or sell for care in old age). I understand its frustrating BUT would you really swap places with someone on benefits????? I know i wouldnt!
My baby will be in childcare form 16 weeks for approximately 25 hours a week and my income will take a serious bashing paying for childcare BUT for me its about self fullfillment, im studying for a degree which i wouldnt be able to do if i didnt work as they are paying for it and I can see a better future financially for me and my children and thats something we wouldnt have if i was on benefits.

Do you know how much money you get on income support? £65.45 a week. Of course you also get CB but you get that too.

Have you ever tried to have a decent life on that kind of money? Clothe your children/put the heating on/afford a holiday/run a car? You quite simply can't

I truly am happy with my lot in life but I know it's hard for other working mothers with less generous maternity pay provision, but some companies pay full pay for 6 or 12 months. Imagine that!!

I can never quite comprehend how people choose to make those decisions about their life and have such low ambition - I've always been brought up with a solid work ethic. That's what we'll pass on to our children too to encourage them to aim high and follow their dreams.

YABU.

Maternity leave is fantastic now and I think we should be grateful to get it all let alone any extended leave. When I had mine it was 90% for six weeks and then about £65 per week I think.

I really don't think anyone has the right to moan about making the choice to have time off and get paid for it.

Georgie, I'll tell you where that dependency started, it started with Thatcher closing down the manufacturing industry/mines where "working class" people would tend to work in low paid jobs. Once they went, they had to claim benefits as there was no work in their area. Then we had the generation of child whose parents hadn't worked for years, then those children didn't work and had children themselves, and so it goes on, as each generation is brought up with no aspirations or ambition inherited. There are still areas where work is massively scarce, such as Sunderland etc.

You're grousing about having 9 months of leave? FFS.

Sell your house, quit your job and go on teh dole then.

See what a wonderful existence it is.

Of course, there's the requisite 'I know someone' 'My SIL/friend' whatever has a grand time on benefits.

Why not enjoy your good fortune rather than spend time thinking about and bitching about other people that you don't even know?

"I can never comprehend how people choose to make those decisions and have such low ambition" - well think yourself lucky you were not born in a mining town or somewhere that had had its industry ripped out and left communties ravaged.

Its all very well to sit on your high horse, I hope you don't also teach your kids to be judgemental about issues you clearly have no knowledge of.

And does anyone apart from a Daily Mail reader use the word "feckless"?