Cold, objective comments required please

[littlepigshavebigears]

OK - just cold, automatic responses please (as my feelings are not objective)

How would you interpret this

A man in his late forties/early fifties is a social worker who works with EBD children in a residential school. He also runs gymnastics clubs and is involved with archery clubs and various children's groups.

he wants to adopt a child and is frequently looking at "be my parent" type publications and talking about particular children he is considering

he has no relationships with women although he does want them and does express attraction for women sometimes

he has a 7yo goddaughter who visits him on her own a lot and spends a lot of time alone with him in his house

on several occasions he takes his top off and asks his goddaughter to scratch his back while they watch videos he has rented for her

one one occasion his goddaughter has a tantrum and throws his TV remote across the room - she doesn't remember what happens next, her next memory is of lying on his tummy on the sofa with his arms around her

he coaches a gymnastic team and once describes how one of his star gymnasts told him she was pregnant - he pinned her up against the wall because he was so angry

impressions? please? is it nothing?

Maybe the 7yo was having such a wild tantrum that the only way she could calm down was by being hugged tightly? During the blackout period, did he take his shirt off?

Maybe the gymnast was quite talented and he was angry at her for messing up her life after all the time and energy he had used to try to help her?

Your doubts suggest something wasn't right, OP. But whether it's worth it to you to delve into it, I dunno.

automatic response after reading the whole thread...

He was a closeted gay man, who worked with children. The adoption thing was because he wanted children. Working with children was instead of being a parent - almost 30 years ago, most gay men weren't out and proud in the main

The tickling of the back - no biggie, have always got my children, male and female to scratch, tickle or rub cream in.

The remote control - most of us would find it difficult to remember exact happenings, we remember parts, so remember tantrum and the cuddle

pregnant teen - I used to be around a gymnastic club and I know that our coach would have created merry hell if one of her stars got pregnant, she was a female coach

That's my automatic response

i think that he does not have much controle over his impulsive behaviour, which is never ideal given his proffessional and community work. he sounds very emotionally imature and I can tell you that if these incidences where reported to the gymnastic club and his employer, the police would be getting involved to discuss his inapropriate behaviour with vulnerable people and be recorded.

maybe you should consider some talkkng or regression based therapy to unearth some of this for you.

did he ever actually adopt?

IMO, no man - with the exception of the child's father - should be taking his top off and asking a 7 year old girl to scratch his back. Sounds like grooming and it sounds like he was pushing his own boundaries to go further.

Sorry OP, hope you're ok. To be honest the whole thing with the clubs sounds very suspicious too - you say one was closed down? I would actually be suspicious of a man who ran that many clubs for children - seems like a lot.