To think that lunch is not enough?
everybodysang · 28/03/2011 20:02
Actually I am pretty sure I am NBU but thought I'd share this.
Am staying at my parent's tonight (and last night) as it was my grandfather's funeral today. I'm about 300 miles from home, and I have my 12 week old baby with me.
My mum has massive food issues, and has done for years. Dad used to really enjoy his food but has developed diabetes, and since retiring has been much more under the influence of my mum regarding what they eat. They both now have very small appetites - my mum always ate tiny amounts but now my dad does too. They also eat lunch at 12 and dinner at 5 - when I'm at home I normally have lunch about 2 and dinner at 8. No problem, though, of course I just fit in with their schedule when I'm here. My mum's small portions and lack of things to eat at theirs is a bit of a joke among my brother and our partners, but I always just make sure I have a few snacks packed in my suitcase in case I get hungry while I'm here.
This time, however, everything had to be booked very last minute and I just didn't have time, or even really think about packing snacks. No matter, it's only a couple of nights, right? So the funeral was today at 12, then arrived at a nearby hotel for lunch at 1. After the meal, my dad said to my mum, "have we got anything in for dinner tonight?"; to which my mum replied, "Son't be ridiculous, we won't want anything to eat at 5 after this enormous lunch." (It was a nice lunch, but by no means enormous, btw). My heart sank but I thought, never mind, I'll take the baby for a walk to the shop later and I can get something to eat. Except the shop is closed for refurbishment. No other shop for miles; no car and no public transport after 5 so no way to get out; breastfeeding the baby which makes me ravenous on a normal day.
AIBU to want to cry a little bit cos I'm so hungry and there's no food at all in the house?
maxpower · 28/03/2011 20:06
Can you get a pizza delivered or something? Seems madness they'd not have extra food in to cater for you. Do they have a car you can borrow or can you send your dad out to get you something? Failing that, don't they have any bread you could toast or some cereal?
dittany · 28/03/2011 20:10
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Message withdrawn at poster's request.
SpringchickenGoldBrass · 28/03/2011 20:11
Are you not phoning for a takeaway because you can't face the amount of verbal you will get from your parents? People whose eating is this disordered often make a mighty big deal of how 'greedy' others are if they ever see someone expressing hunger or eating when they are not eating. If that's what's bothering you, remember that they are weird and you, as a BFing mum, need food.
squeakytoy · 28/03/2011 20:15
If you are miles from anywhere, I dont suppose a takeaway delivery is an option. There must be something in the house though. Even if it is what was planned for tomorrows lunch, you can always replace that in the morning.
YANBU, you are breastfeeding and need to eat regularly.
earlyriser · 28/03/2011 21:01
First time i visited my in laws i couldn't believe how little food was in the house. MIL would say oh we got some apples in for you becasue we know you like healthy food. And there would be 2 apples in the bowl, and nothing in fridge except wine and coke (for the vodka!). I would feel very greedy for eating (or wanting to eat) 3 meals a day. If they went out for lunch (and mil would always order the child's meal) that would be all they would eat all day.
So although most normal people would get in food for guests, if you don't eat much yourself, some people struggle to know just what constitutes normal eating patterns.
Hope you have managed to egt something to eat now op, if it's any consolation i weep when hungry too (and not even breastfeeding)
megapixels · 28/03/2011 21:13
YANBU. Poor you, I used to feel ravenous while bfing too. You need the food. I once bfed DD while I was dead hungry and didn't have anything to eat for half a day (long story) and I actually collapsed afterwards.
My mother is like this too, more out of laziness than any other reason, she eats tiny morsels and is surprised at the amount others eat. Even if she orders in something she saves most of it for the next weekday and only uses the bare minimum. Dh brought in some Indian takeaway once when she was staying with us and when he went to eat there was some plain rice and three tiny prawns, she had put the rest in the fridge for some other time and was surprised that we would want to eat more. Drives me nuts.
paulapantsdown · 28/03/2011 21:29
My friends inlaws are like this - they went for lunch with the two kids (not babies), so, 4 adults and 2 kids kids and the MIL presented 2 x 8inch cheese and tomato pizzas on a tray. No garlic bread or salad too, just the pizzas!
Can your parents not get in the car and go and get something for you?
I would eat all of tomorrows lunch and get them to bring you to the shops in the morning to buy the makings of a big fry up breakfast.
FlaminGreatGallah · 28/03/2011 21:41
YANBU I've been in your position a few times. When we visit the ILs we stay with DH's grandmother who has the appetite of a bird and shops every day. She does bake things for us and is utterly lovely but I hate having to rely on other people for food and making decisions about mealtimes. Doubly horrible when I was BF.
So sorry for your loss too.
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