To worry about my daughter wearing contact lenses aged 14?

[cymruoddicatref]

I really struggle with this. Her dad gave in and took her to a high st optician and she now wears daily disposable lenses. It is supposed to be limited to 10 hours a day 2 to 3 days a week (minus 5 prescription), but already it is creeping up, and is a source of daily argument. The optician response is to try and sell me even more expensive lenses that "let in more oxygen" but I think a better response is not to wear them so often. I have bought her some lovely "designer" glasses with thin lenses, but the contacts still keep winning the day. She has friends who won't leave the house in glasses, so I am competing with strong peer pressure. Leaving (astronomical) cost aside for a moment, I and several of my friends found that long term (ie 10 plus years) of wearing lenses left us unable to wear lenses at all, because of high levels of discomfort - (although lenses in my day were not disposable, and I kept the same pair at university for a horrifying 3 years.) But anyway, I feel this is fairly uncharted territory, as nobody alive has worn lenses for more than say 40 years... My latest tactic is to withdraw funding, but I would like an objective view of the long term risks, that I could present to her - not scaremongering.

Well, I'm 'only' 33 so perhaps not old enough to know really long term risks (but maybe younger than you - and I think people who had the earlier lenses have definitely suffered more?) , but I started wearing lenses everyday at 15 (similar 'script), and these were the old 'gas permeables' which probably let in less oxygen than the new soft ones (a lot cheaper tho, priovided you didn't lose them). My eyes are in fantastic health, according to the optician.

I understand where you are coming from but I would have been DEVASTATED if my mum had taken away my lenses at that age. Would have been worse than never having them at all. At 14, designer glasses DO NOT cut it. As she gets older she'll probably get less bothered about wearing them all the time - the young teen years are the peak 'self-conscious about looks' years!

Hi OP. I wore contacts from the age of 16 and never wore glasses. I had laser surgery when I was in my early 30's and wish I'd done it earlier. I suspect your daughter will eventually see that glasses can be really cool too but maybe it won't always have to be lenses - eventually she could correct her vision using laser. I understand your worry, but I don't think it will do her any long term damage and I also suspect it will be a phase. I also suggest looking online for daily disposals, you can get them at a really reasonable cost. I hated the thought of glasses as a teenager and never ever wore them (I went straight to lenses). I understand your daughter's reluctance too. I would have been devastated if I was forced to wear glasses as a teenager (but I am incredibly vain!). I also went through a phase of loving wearing my glasses. I'm 40 now and have perfect sight without the glasses or lenses - the laser surgery is still going strong.

Likewise I started wearing lenses 21 years ago aged 15. I wore soft lenses from the start, horribly overwore them in my early 20's due to my working hours and hence switched to daily disposable to ensure I didn't have problems with inadequately cleaned lenses.

My eyes have no problems with new vessel growth due to inadequate oxygen and I have never had an infection.

Aged 15 I would have vigorously resisted any attempt to take away my lenses exactly as charitygirl says.

ps, you're not being unreasonable to worried.

I have worn lenses every day since I was 13, I am now 37.
I am on daily disposables, eyes are perfectly healthy.
I was on cruddy gas permeable hard lenses which I never rarely cleaned, at University I dread to think what gunk was in my eyes. Have been on dailies for about 9 years I think.

I think that the modern lenses let lots of oxygen into the eye and are very safe tbh.

Similar to charitygirl: started wearing lenses at 15. I do wear the ones that 'let more oxygen' in and IMO if you are going to wear lenses at all, you should splash out and get these, as they are best for your eyes. I have the same prescription as your DD.

Plus, a few things...

• glasses are worse for your eyes longterm with most standard prescriptions. This is because the focal gap between your eye and the corrective lens is comparatively big, so the eye has to 'make an effort' to adjust to see through it. But with contacts, it's lots smaller. So over time, your prescription is less likely to degrade if you wear contacts. At least, this is what I've been told.

• glasses are really inconvenient for sports/ in rain/ when driving in sun/ etc. One major reason I got contacts was hating swimming in a fog; it's actually quite scary.

• glasses also (I find) make me feel weirdly dissociated from the outside world compared to contacts. I think it's because you can't see perfectly all around you, iyswim, but only through a square of glass right in front of your eyes. You don't really have proper peripheral vision, which is quite disorienting.

It really does make a difference to your quality of life. If you can't afford, you can't, but if you can, then I think YABU as it really does make you feel different to wear contacts, and it's not just a fashion thing.

I think you are worrying needlessly.... and if you are that worried why not pay for the 'safe' ones.. they aren't that much if you shop around (17.50 / month was the quote I got recently for 'decent' daily disposables).

I think the long term risks are pretty minimal but I'm not an eye person. In addition AFAIK you are no more at risk wearing 'strong' contacts than 'weak' ones. I have quite a significant prescription and my chunky modern plastic frames + skinny lenses are still heavy enough to cause me discomfort if I have to wear them for extended periods. My most comfortable glasses are the no frame titanium ones but they were: 1) stupidly expensive, 2) are stupidly expensive to re-lense and 3) unfashionable now and I care about that as your glasses are the first thing that people notice about you.

I worry about the oxygen supply to my eyes and have been repeatedly reassured that my eyes show no sign of damage. I've worn contacts since I was 13 (initially just for sport and 'special ocassions' and continously since about the age of 21. I'm now in my early 30s. I now wear the potentially even more problematic extended wear lenses and have done so for > 5 years with only one issue in all that time.

I have an active job and play a lot of sport and wearing glasses just doesn't work for me at all. Also add up the cost of glasses, and a spare pair (you need a spare pair if you only have glasses and a -5 prescription, believe me) and prescriptions sunglasses and I'm sure the contacts won't be much more expensive. I'm so blind that my cost- benefit analysis would also have to include prescription swimming goggles, a diving mask and ski goggles. The contacts suddenly start to look very cost effective!

Do crack down on sleeping in them overnight (that is bad unless you have special lenses) and encourage contact lens free 'oxygen' time around the house. If she has any problems ensure that she knows to see the optician urgently as this is where I've seen friends run into problems.

I've been wearing lenses more or less every day for the last 20 years since I was 15 as well. I didn't even start off with gas permeable ones, I had the cheaper ones that probably didn't let your eye breathe at all!

The new modern soft lenses do let alot of oxygen to the eye and as long as you make sure she has regulary checkups and uses the lens reposnsibily i.e. a new pair everyday if disposables, no skimping on the cost by using more than once, then she should be OK.

I can understand your concerns if you have had a bad experience of lenses in the past but I have only had positive experience with my lenses

I really wouldnt take them away. I have daily disposables which i first started at 14. I loved them , id always hated my glasses. Even now i wear them every day and hate my glasses even though i bought them myself in a period where i couldnt wear my lenses and they cost over £300 for designer frames and thin lenses.
Im just not as confident in them , they make me feel ugly always have. I was the geeky kid in the glasses in school and hated it. My contact lenses are something id sell my soul to be able to keep wearing if i had to.I cant say much about long term risks as im quite young but the modern lenses are amazing compared to what they used to be , even the ones which have come out in the last 5 years or so are better than the ones i started wearing at 14.

I started wearing hard lenses when I was 17 and I'm now 56! To be fair I have progressed through gas permeables and now have daily disposables as do my 17 year old twins. They have had them since they were 14 and wear them from 7.30am to say 10.30pm with no ill effects at all. We all have regular checks and no problems have ever been detected. I'm not an optician but I think if your DD is ok with them three days a week she should be ok wearing them seven days. My twins were told not to wear them for longer than about 10 hours a day to start with, but now wear them all day til bed time.

Oh and this might be a 'dad' trait. It was my Dad who allowed me to get my first contact lenses and first pair of designer glasses.

It could also be that he is also a high myope whereas my jammy Mother hadn't had a pair of glasses 'til old age caught up with her last year.

Well I started wearing lenses at 14 (-7.5) and am now 44. I'd worn glasses since I was 7 & had always hated, hated, hated them...

I started off with the old gas-permeable ones & if I'm honest wore them for too long (basically from getting up to going to bed every day).

In my early 30s I switched to daily disposables and again wore them too long. I was starting to get some minor lack-of-oxygen issues in my late 30s & switched again to 30 day extended wear (basically you wear for 30 days& nights & then throw away) & they are soooo comfy (they are designed to let in loads of oxygen) & my optician says my eyes really healthy now & sees no reason why I can't wear lenses for the foreseeable future.

I will probably stop when I'm too old & frail to get them in & out, but that's a good few years off yet!

It is a very individual thing, my DB started lenses at 18 & by his 40s he was struggling with lens intolerance (so went & got lasered instead) - the optician should be able to advise your DD of the best course of action.

Modern lenses are way better than the once I started off with though, so I would imagine that you are a lot less likely to hit the same problems starting now as starting out 30 years ago like I did.

You wouldn't find me without my glasses, began wearing at age 14 and never take them off. Love them, wouldn't wear contacts for anything.

Glasses suit me and I suit them!

But I do think you are being over protective there are many here who have worn them for years and have no trouble.

I actually cannot wait until my 7 year old can wear lenses, he wears glasses and is very sporty. Today we had to go to our friendly opticians to get his glasses fixed after a heading the ball incident playing football.
Watching him when he plays football it is evident that he sometimes can't see the ball, from the side etc, the bits that glasses don't cover.
He has severe astigmatism in one eye.

Talk to your optician about your concerns

As a compromise perhaps: encourage your daughter to take her lenses out in the evening (agree a time e.g. 8.30pm), and perhaps have a 'no lenses' day every week/fortnight (Sunday). This is what my optician has advised if you have any worries/concerns. It might help to reduce your concerns.

I only really wear my lenses (daily disposable with a -5 perscription) when I am going to work, meeting people, being sociable. If I am have a homebound day or just going to the supermarket I don't bother.

I've been wearing contact lenses for over 25 years now and my eyes are in very good health. I wear daily disposables these days. As long as she looks after her eyes, goes for her mandatory checkups, and takes a break every so often, she should be fine.

I was thinking I'd let DD2-8 start with contact lenses when she goes to secondary school. She can't wait.

I started wearing lenses at 16 (after being forced to wear glasses since 9 mths old!). It made a huge difference to my self confidence and I have to say I still hate wearing glasses even now 25 years later.

When I was 15 I hated wearing glasses so much I used to wear them to leave the house then take them off at the end of the street and put them on to come home again. Unfortunately I was hit by a car whilst crossing the road as I just didn't see the car coming. That was when my mum agreed to me trying CLs.

My eyes are still in great condition and I use "daysoft" which is a cheaper version of daily disposables that you can buy from the internet at around half the price of other brands.

Moving from glasses to lenses changed my life! I would say that as long as your DD is aware of health and hygiene (hand washing, not wearing them if she has an infection, limiting use etc) then there should be no problem!

Thanks for all this great feedback - very reassuring - I do understand why she wants to wear them - I too loathed my glasses as a late teen - and once I had my lenses I even kept a poster stuck to the ceiling of my bedroom asking "can you read this?" to remind me to take them out at night as I couldn't afford glasses as well as lenses. I haven't forgotten how ghastly glasses are...

I started wearing lenses at 15 and I cannot begin to describe the positive difference they made to my life at that age. My mum, like you, was always very generous with my glasses and always bought me whichever pair of glasses I wanted.

But they were still glasses. And I was far, far happier not wearing them.

Now, 15 years later, I do choose to wear my glasses more often but that is not because my lovely, modern disposable lenses aren't comfy. Please do talk to your optician about your concerns before you try to take them away - I'm sure you'll feel happier about the situation if you do.

OP - I think you're right to be a bit cautious.

About 20 years ago I had what were probably the first extended wear lenses (where you wear them day and night). I ended up with ulcers on my cornea and now have permanent scarring.

It sounds worse than it is! My eyesight wasn't damaged (well, no worse than it was anyway!) and after a year or so I could go back to wearing lenses.
But it could have been worse, and it really made me aware that you have to look after your eyes as you only have one pair and you can't get another. And although lenses have got so much better over last 20 years don't think I would ever try extended wear lenses again.

Difficult decision for you. I remember being 14 and going around half blind because i just would not wear glasses. Whatever you decide you need to follow the optician's advice but be aware that even that isn't a guarantee (I was following thier advice to the letter, never suggested there could be any problem). Whatever you do make sure you instill in them the need to be scrupulous about cleaning, not accidnetly falling asleep in lenses, having all the regular checkups etc.

Sorry, x-posted with you OP!

And I too used to put my nhs glasses in my pocket once out of the house and recognize people by their general shape - eg did they carry a bag under their arm, or whatever - and playing sport was a nightmare because I never knew whether people were smiling or not - my worst moment was a biology lesson when a particularly nasty teacher asked me to describe something written on the board, only to announce that the board was blank, and that he would be writing to my parents. I was saved by an alto in my church choir who happened to work in the local opticians who took pity on me and gave me an old pair of frames - horrid gold metal things - but at least they weren't plastic nhs humiliation...

I started wearing lenses at 16 and am now 49. I have had hard, gas permeable (hated them), daily disposable and now monthly (taking out at night).

I absolutely hated my glasses when I was your DD's age. My DD is 14 and if she has to wear her glasses all the time then i will suggest her getting lenses. I think your DD will be fine wearing them daily so long as she takes them out when she is at home (maybe after school if she's not going out). Are you sure that's correct, only 2 to 3 days a week? To my mind, you might as well not bother as you'd have to wear glasses the rest of the time. Was the two to three times a week only while she was getting used to wearing them?

Now I'm older I'm not so precious about not wearing my glasses, but I do have very nice glasses. I think just ensure that your DD goes to every single check-up and go back to the optician if you've any worries at all.

I must admit a girl of 24 where I work wanted to wear lenses recently, had some trouble after two weeks and now can never wear lenses ever again. So your DD must realise that she can't leave any symptoms at all, and must tell you everything to do with her eyes.

cymru Ah so you know :)

I genuinely would think about the health of your DD's eyes longterm, but in terms of her prescreption: honestly, have been told by more than one optician that contacts are better from that p.o.v.

and yeah, the one day off lenses is a good idea and I still do it though I have weekly wear (i.e. I sleep in them).

Just thought I'd let you know my mum must have been wearing lenses for well over 50 years, had them in teens, is now 73, has Never had any problems despite them being hard ones, now gas permeable, and wearing the same ones for 5-10 years IIRC.

I got them aged 14 (& 1st boyfriend a month later!) & have no problems, currently in monthly ones. I Never wear glasses outside. I wouldn't worry apart from at the cost.