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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To think I am the only parent to have lost it in public??

27 replies

mrsnw · 21/03/2011 15:44

Took my DS to one of his clubs today and completely lost it with him and ended up in tears. It was in so public as well!! People I know there were very supportive but I am so ashamed. Don't want to go back next week. Tell me I'm not the only crap mother

OP posts:

ChippingInMistressSteamMop · 21/03/2011 15:47

You wont be the first
You wont be the last
By next week you'll be fish & chip wrapping

Don't give it another thought...

though if you want to off load, tell us what he was doing and what you said

ApocalypseCheeseToastie · 21/03/2011 15:47

meh

ScarlettWalking · 21/03/2011 15:49

Don't beat yourself up about it we all have a breaking point. The fact that you feel bad about it speaks volumes.

Maybe think about some techniques for getting through that point of no return next time.

saffy85 · 21/03/2011 15:50

YABU as you are not the only person to have lost it in public! I know I have! DD (3) can be a pain in the arse challenge to get to leave nursery in the afternoon and since being pregnant I've lost my temper with her before as I can't pick her up as easily anymore.

I don't think losing it makes you a crap mum at all (if it is I'm doomed- may as well call SS myself and tell them to take my DC off me now), I think it makes us human. I think it is important though that if you behave unreasonably you apologise. I've had to do this to my DD when I have reacted in a way I shouldn't have. But then again, when she does something she shouldn't I expected her to say sorry too.

Original poster

mrsnw · 21/03/2011 15:51

What meh? New to mumsnet. He's four and wouldn't stopped running and generally being a pita. I grabbed him and shouted really loud and lost it. And then I cried how pathetic. God I could die!!! Everyone was looking. I have just never done it before.

OP posts:

ApocalypseCheeseToastie · 21/03/2011 15:52

Meh, as in it's no big deal

QueenBathsheba · 21/03/2011 15:52

Do you have to stay with him at the club?

gegs73 · 21/03/2011 15:54

I agree, we all do it from time to time don't beat yourself up about it. If ever I see Mums losing it I always feel pretty sorry for them. And don't think at all that they are bad Mums! You are only human!!!

Queenofchaos · 21/03/2011 15:55

TBH am amazed that he has made it to 4 years and this is the first time you have lost it in public!

You are most definitely not the only one and I bet everyone else there was secretly glad that on this occasion it wasn't them!

Good luck facing them again!

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726 · 21/03/2011 15:57

God no, OP. Of course you're not. Kids can really push buttons sometimes and as you say, you had a lot of sympathy. Go back to the club with your head held high, it can happen to anybody and it doesn't make you a bad parent.

Lucylu5 · 21/03/2011 15:59

Totally lost it in public too......my daughter just picked at day that was going really badly (and hate to admit it but I had pmt as well!) and that was it I was a gibbering wreak! Can't even remember what it was about now.
Like you everyone around me was really kind and supportive (and shocked) usually quite a calm organised sort of person. I felt stupid, but certainly not worried about what everyone around me thought, think most people have at least one day like that!
Hope you are feeling better now x

Original poster

mrsnw · 21/03/2011 16:01

Thanks guys. Feeling better already. Love the cooment by Queen about him getting to four lol. It was while he was waiting for the club to start. Will go and say sorry and will face them next week. I've just never seen another mum lose it.

OP posts:

Original poster

mrsnw · 21/03/2011 16:02

comment not cooment. Must say my children have been very well behaved since we got home

OP posts:

Original poster

mrsnw · 21/03/2011 16:06

Totally understand the pmt thing Lucy. Definately think that the children's behaviour changes at that time of the month.

OP posts:

NoWayNoHow · 21/03/2011 16:06

No big deal, we've all been there. It does feel embarrassing, but every mother I've ever spoken to says they look at mums who lose it and feel bad and think, "at least they're TRYING" which is more than can be said for some other mums (sadly)

Olessaty · 21/03/2011 16:09

I lose it loads. In public and at home. Kids are hard going. I'm learning to take five minutes and walk away. In public it's not so easy to do that. Don't be embarrassed, whenever I see someone else doing this, I am right there with them completely sympathising and knowing exactly how they feel.

wendihouse22 · 21/03/2011 16:09

We've all been pushed to the edge......

Shows we're human.

Give yourself a break, woman !

topsyturner · 21/03/2011 16:12

Perfectly normal !
Also it teaches the little darlings that we are not afraid to tell them off in public .
I do it all the time .

controlpantsandgladrags · 21/03/2011 16:16

I completely lost it with DD this morning in public too. There was shouting and tears and grabbing her arm way too roughly. She has taken to running off when we are out and about and started legging it accross a car park this morning.

We've all done it. Sometimes you need to give them a shock to make them stop and think.

Original poster

mrsnw · 21/03/2011 16:19

Yeah I think the time had come when he needed that shock controlpants lol at the name

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QueenBathsheba · 21/03/2011 16:21

Well at least you don't have to stay there! Be prepared for next week and have chat with him on the way there, then when he behaves the other mothers will think it's a new radical approach to discipline

Seriously everyone will have forgotten by next week, just forget about it. It's no big deal, we have all had bad days or indeed naughty children mishaps.

Maryz · 21/03/2011 16:22

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MmeLindt · 21/03/2011 16:28

lol MaryZ.

We had just moved house, hardly seen new neighbours. I had an appointment and DD was being an utter terror. I shoved her in her car seat, all the while berating her for being a horrible little girl, stood up, slammed the door shut hard, and looked up to see my new neighbour locking her door.

[sheepish] "Oh, hellloOOOoo, nice to meet you" [cheery wave]

Don't give it another thought, MrsNW. We have all done it.

Original poster

mrsnw · 21/03/2011 16:34

lol at the radical new approach to discipline Queen. Glad to hear i'm not alone.

OP posts:

trumpton · 21/03/2011 16:48

I still rtemember jumping up and down on a packet of crisps in the carpark and screaming at DS that he didn't have to have them if he didn't want them !! ( He wanted sweets not horrid crips horrid mummy ) ( I ran the local Pre-school Playgroup )

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