Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to ask you how many sexual partners is too many?

80 replies

bobbyshaftosgirl · 19/03/2011 21:57

and then take a deep breath before admitting that I don't know the exact number I've had (lost count [embarassed])but that its at least 30...

OP posts:
UndiscoveredApprentice · 20/03/2011 10:34

I've only had one Blush

Ciske · 20/03/2011 10:35

Too many would be if the neighbours start complaining about the queue outside the door.

Anything else is personal preference.

Ambi · 20/03/2011 10:40

I met DH at 18, so my number is pretty low with others my age.

ByThePowerOfGreyskull · 20/03/2011 10:44

Personally, I feel that the count shouldn't come to more than one per couple of months for the time you are counting.
given that that can add up to alot once we are older I don't think you should worry AT ALL!!

TondelayoSchwarzkopf · 20/03/2011 10:49

What Ciske said. And then only if they were causing a highway obstruction or breaking party wall agreements.

bronze · 20/03/2011 11:02

UA- I've only have one too. no need to Blush
For me it's nice that the beast who took my vaginity, my first love and my current partner are all the same.
People are allowed to be different

UndiscoveredApprentice · 20/03/2011 11:04

lol at the 'beast' remark lol.

extremepie · 20/03/2011 11:14

I read an article about a girl who had slept with 5000 men, apparently, which I think is too many!
She had 4 in one day! I dread to think how may DNA tests she would have to have if she got pregnant!
Don't know how true this is but I thought that was a lot.

My own number is 2 but generally I would say it doesn't matter unless you think it does.

Nothing to do with anyone else really :)

piratecat · 20/03/2011 11:15

that ratio thing makes things sound far more spaced out.

thanks Grin

vouvrey · 20/03/2011 11:24

My ratio is 9. I miss being single!

BettyCash · 20/03/2011 11:27

Should my ratio be a decimal? :S

Oblomov · 20/03/2011 11:46

Errrrrr, where are all the high numbers ?
There are many Mn'ers who have/had, what shall we call it ? extensive experience ? a very prolific sexual appetite ?
Yet the posts here are very very tame.

TheSecondComing · 20/03/2011 13:06

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

VajazzHands · 20/03/2011 14:20

In theory I say it it doesn't matter.

But in practice I think it would freak me out if Dh had been with loads. Not sure why..

Gettingthere1 · 20/03/2011 15:17

I have had 3. I have to say without a doubt that I would have loved to have been like Bronze and been lucky enough for my partner to be my first. And him too.I have tried to convince myself that my past partners have just made me, me but thats a load of twaddle. We all of course have our own opinions on this subject and whats good for one is perhaps not for another. We are humans ! Most important thing to us is that we talk about it openly and both feel that we are the best of the best which is fab.

DooinMeCleanin · 20/03/2011 15:20

Too many is more than you feel comfortable with. Not enough is less than you feel comfortable with.

ByThePowerOfGreyskull · 23/03/2011 21:44

Half your age and add 5 - then I've got a lot of catching up to do, out of my way!

If you want to be really childish specific, you take your age now minus the age you lost your virginity (ie no of sexually active years)

37-11= 26

Then you take away the number of years you have been in a monogamous relationship (so you're left with your 'single' years)

=16

Then you divide the number of partners you've had TOTAL by the number of single years

=0.75

And that's your 'ratio' rather than your number and is supposedly more comparable.

so now I have done that... what does it mean??

adamschic · 23/03/2011 21:48

More than most I reckon but it's not too many because I still want to find another one who takes my breath away. Grin

alemci · 23/03/2011 21:54

TBH once i had given birth i wondered what all the fuss about sex was. I think it depends on whether you are lucky enough to meet someone you want to be with long term.

any other bf's i had before my dh don't really matter. I think it is better not to sleep around but once you have done it with one person you tend to carry on with the next. The comment about the 3 made sense to me.

I think there was the Aids scare around when i was a teenager with the death of Rock Hudson which was at the back of my mind.

BelleDameSansMerci · 23/03/2011 21:55

I've had loads... Popularity can be such a burden Grin

Seriously, don't think it matters.

BluddyMoFo · 23/03/2011 21:56

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MinnieBar · 24/03/2011 07:05

Greyskull - then you compare with other people and feel better or worse about yourself Wink
Did it on a hen night once and I think most people were around the 2 mark. Not saying the group was representative!

Disclaimer: I don't really have a clue (about many things)

SylvanianFamily · 24/03/2011 07:09

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

izzybiz · 24/03/2011 07:18

About 20ish over a two year period, between splitting from my first BF and meeting Dh.

Some I slept with only once, others a handful of times.

Were good times! Grin

Bunbaker · 24/03/2011 07:27

"A small figure makes you a prude, a large one a slag"

I disagree. A pp pointed out that it depends what age you were when you met your life partner. I couldn't care less as long as no-one gets hurt.