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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To tel MIL that DD can't have MORE crap to eat?

72 replies

SeeJaneKick · 17/03/2011 15:54

MIL just went to collect DD from school....well she came with me and DD2 and she brught along a large sweet for each child....was a bit annoyed as I have told her that am stopping the sweets during the week....we get home and she says "Ive got another treat for you!"

To my DD1 and then says to me "It's just a cake"

I'm a bit Hmm but m hoping it's some kind of muffin....maybe a plainish one...but no...she brings out a BIG fairy cake for each child...thick layer of icing on each which is encrusted in sweets!

The bloody cakes had more sugar in each one than a mars bar by the look of them!

I took them and put them high in the cupboard and said "You can't eat those before dinner...if you're good and do all your homework then I might let you later but not now"

Mil looked like this Shock Hmm

WHY did she get them this shite in addition to the sweets at the school gates?

And am I BU to take them?

OP posts:
Original poster
SeeJaneKick · 17/03/2011 18:27

Usual....some kids are more sensitive to it..my youngest is fine but the eldest is nightmare.

PigValentine it wouldn't have been normal...and we DO have a problem in this country...look how many fat kids there are.

OP posts:
Bogeyface · 17/03/2011 18:28

Usualsuspect, some kids are just more susceptible.

I have never had a problem with sugar but my sister was always absolutely foul within half an hour of having more than a small amount. She still is, so although she has a very sweet tooth she has to limit herself very strictly otherwise her rush and then crash is awful. The same with my children, they are all fine except dd1 who seems to have a sensitivity to it, in that when she crashes she is really bad and in a foul mood for a good hour afterwards.

Just because most kids are ok doesnt mean they all are.

Bogeyface · 17/03/2011 18:29

X-post SJK!!

Bogeyface · 17/03/2011 18:31

Pig
There wasnt as much food around then though. Snacking just didnt happen like it does now. there was no fast food, no convenience food and you ate what was put in front of you and that was your lot! OK so alot of the meals were less health, but there was less of it and what there was was fresh. Portion sizes are alot bigger now than they were too

exhausted2011 · 17/03/2011 21:13

so you are freaking out about a moam and an iced cupcake?? Lifes too short to get worked up about this. It really isn't going to kill them or make them fat or give them diabetes. It will however give them good memories about their grandparents to hold on to after they die.

If it's such a major issue, just do what you did and save it until after dinner , or for a treat. Bloody hell

Nanny0gg · 17/03/2011 21:19

I would never dare give my grandchildren foods their parents didn't allow...

usualsuspect · 17/03/2011 21:24

No foods should not be allowed

GotArt · 17/03/2011 21:27

Its one thing to give a little sweet when they get out of school for the day but a big piece of cakeish something or other just before dinner is not nice. The parent is the one that is going to be dealing with that child later, not the GP, when they are either bouncing off the walls and not eating their dinner and much later when they wake in the middle of the night because they are starving and won't sleep. She lacks common sense. Saving them for after dinner is completely appropriate.

usualsuspect · 17/03/2011 21:30

I have never known a child to bounce off the walls because they have had a cup cake ..

over reaction much

TheSkiingGardener · 17/03/2011 22:09

If this happened once in a blue moon I'd let it go, but if it happened all the time I wouldn't be happy. I would explain why as well and see if that had any effect. Children need a balanced diet and are going to eat less of their good dinner if they are full of sugary crap.

The real question is would she respect your request or not? If not, that's the problem, not the cupcake.

Bogeyface · 17/03/2011 22:29

Usual, that would be because you have never had a child with a sugar sensitivity.

There is no need to be rude about something just because you dont understand it and have never experienced it.

seeker · 17/03/2011 22:37
  1. Sugar high has been proven to be a myth.
  1. "Your kids, your rules" is the most ghastly, depressing, graceless, humourless, insular statement made on mumsnet (I have neve heard anyone say it in real life!)
  1. I do not believe there is a child living who would be more impressed by a banana than a bag of sweets. Raspberries, possibly, but not a banana!
Bogeyface · 17/03/2011 23:06

Sugar high, maybe. Sugar crash? No, it happens, medical fact.

GotArt · 18/03/2011 01:55

Sugar "high", no. But it does boast most people to an extent. Sugar "crash", most definitely.

My DD is one of those crazy kids that eats her fruit first always and rarely ever finishes a baked good at snack time or the occasional sweet she's had. Although, if there's pickles around, that's all she'll eat.

seeker · 18/03/2011 07:02

SHow me a child that suffers a "sugar crash" after a Moab chew and a fairy cake and I'll show you a child who doesn't get enough exercise, or who is too closely observed!

Bogeyface · 18/03/2011 08:26

I'll be sure to tell my sister who suffers from appalling crashes, that her 14 hour days on her feet treating people isnt enough exercise. I'm sure it will change her life Hmm

Biscuit
fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 18/03/2011 08:36

I thought biscuits had too much sugar in them?

Wink
Desperateforthinnerthighs · 18/03/2011 09:41

There is no need to be rude about something just because you dont understand it and have never experienced it.

Bogeyface thankyou - I wish we would apply this to fussy eaters too, lol

In all fairness when I first read OP I didnt see that she had already let them have the sweet...that's more than fair so yeah put the cake away and let them have that later

TheLadyEvenstar · 18/03/2011 09:46

oh I miss my Nan, she used to let me have fresh cream cakes for breakfast when we went to the bakers - which was everyday when we stayed as children.
My Grandad is sadly missed too he used to buy us sweets and give us money for sweets too.

Isn't it just what grandparents do?

Skinit · 18/03/2011 09:49

Seeker...what are you? An expert on the OPs child?? No. So you talk shite.

FattyArbuckel · 18/03/2011 09:58

YABU! I think your MIL is being sweet to your children, but if this isn't acceptable to you then surely you just need to come out and tell her?

Ask your MIL to check with you before she gives food to your kids. This is not an unreasonable request to make and you should expect her to respect your wishes as their mother.

You could suggest to her other ways for her to show her affection to your children that you would approve of.

NarcolepsyQueen · 18/03/2011 10:06

I have the opposite from my parents - they have bought my DD a creme egg for easter (the singular ones - not a large egg with creme eggs inside) as they dont agree with too much chocolate. This thing is, my DD is more of a savoury girl and we still have an easter egg left over from last year!

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