Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to ask politely that a visiting child not to have sugar on his cereal?

360 replies

ChaosTrulyReigns · 14/03/2011 10:34

Occasionally I'll have one of DD2's classmates before school, as it helps with his parents' working situation.

I have 4 DCs who obviously will have to be cautious over their eating habits for life. Genes. Sad

Therefore we have only cereals that are not excessively sugary for breakfast.

This child moans about what is on offer at my house. So he then asks for augar to be added to weetabix, which I would rather not, but if DS is not in the room he can have some discreetly, as the girls understand my rationale, but DS is only 4 and I would rather not have this eating style visible to him.

So, AIBU to request politely that he doesn't add sugar when ChaoticBoy is around?

OP posts:
stripeymama · 14/03/2011 17:58

I am Confused about how adverserial this thread has become!

If sugar doesn't go on cereal in your house then that is just tough titty for all concerned, visiting children included. Its not rude or mean, its just how the food is served in your house. I have never even considered that it would be somehow unacceptable for me to apply our rules to visiting children.

Its better in the long run to avoid instilling a taste for added refined sugar. End of.

MrsGuyOfGisbourne · 14/03/2011 18:00

We have eggs, takes as little time as it would to do the cereal, and agree with previous poster is more filling and better nutritionally.

stripeymama · 14/03/2011 18:00

"ALthough, my opinion is that a bit of sugar isn't going to make your DCs "sturdy" "

No, but adding refined sugar to foods that are not intrinsically sweet will instil a taste for sweetened foods that will do them no favours in the future...

diddl · 14/03/2011 18:04

But why would you force someone to eat something in a way that they don´t like?

Bogeyface · 14/03/2011 18:06

i wonder what the reaction would have been if the OP had said

"The kids have never had sugar on cereals but now they are a bit older I am going to start giving them a bit in the morning as one of their friends has it"

Cue lots of accusations of bad parenting for introducing unhealthy foods, suggestions that the OP needs a course in healthy eating etc!

exoticfruits · 14/03/2011 18:08

I don't see why you can't offer a visitor something you don't have. None of us take sugar in hot drinks-I still offer it to visitors. I don't tell them they shouldn't have it! I suspect the real problem is that OP's DCs haven't decided on 'no sugar'for themselves.

FourFortyFour · 14/03/2011 18:08

Mine have never had sugar added to their cereal and they have weetabix, porridge, special K, muesli, fruit and fibre, rice crispies and shreddies.

stripeymama · 14/03/2011 18:09

He's not being forced though is he.

OP has a wide range of cereals for him to choose from. If he finds them all unpalateable through lack of sugar he is frankly a fussy little poppet.

exoticfruits · 14/03/2011 18:10

In that case FourFortyFour-why does it bother you if another DC has it?

Bogeyface · 14/03/2011 18:10

Hopefully if the OP keeps saying that they dont have any sugar in the house then the kid will complain to his parents and they will find alternative childcare. Sorted :o

TheSecondComing · 14/03/2011 18:11

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

FourFortyFour · 14/03/2011 18:11

It doesn't, exoticfruits. I was making a comment on what we do in my family.

diddl · 14/03/2011 18:13

OK, not being forced, but he´s chosen what he would like & can´t have it how he would like it.

And perhaps he would ask for sugar if he had another cereal?

If OPs children are happy with no sugar, why is it such a problem?

exoticfruits · 14/03/2011 18:14

Lots of DCs are quite happy without-they don't all have a sweet tooth. If they have chosen to have no sugar then another child having some isn't going to make any difference. It only makes a difference if it has been imposed and not chosen.

bringonthegoat · 14/03/2011 19:49

Laugh away - Sugar

Original poster
ChaosTrulyReigns · 15/03/2011 09:35

It's the fact that my 4yo doesn't associate sugar with cereal, and if he sees someone have sugar on theirs, he will make that association and therefore have a wobbly or nag for sugar on his cereal.

As he's content without sugar, and the family is prone to fleshiness, I'd rather that we can continue in the vein of sugarless cereal, and then I can feel easier about other sugary foods combined with a healthly lifedtyle.

If this child's request was to grate chocolate/out Haribo on his cereal, would it be easier to see my POV? These are not banned items but I would like them eaten in moderate quantities at sppropriate times.

Iyswim?

Smile
OP posts:
AngelsOnHigh · 15/03/2011 09:49

Put the sugar on his cereal before your DS sees you doing it.

I don't eat sugar or salt but I always have small amounts in the pantry for guests.

Your DS has to learn that at the moment he has to live by your rules which are not necessarily other peoples rules.

exoticfruits · 15/03/2011 17:02

Being sneaky is never a good idea-DCs have a nose for sussing it out!

IslaValargeone · 15/03/2011 17:13

A bit late to the party here, but my dc had a friend who came round and when offered water or fruit juice, told me she only drank coke.
Erm, not in my house sweet cheeks. So my view is, your house your way.

exoticfruits · 15/03/2011 18:06

Well coke is an easy one. We have sugar, but we never have coke! I think it is a bit different-you have to stock sugar-even if it is only to give workmen in their tea.

IslaValargeone · 15/03/2011 18:08

The principle is the same, and the rules with children don't apply in adult circumstances.

grumpypants · 15/03/2011 18:21

fgs this is ridiculous. give the poor kid a tsp of sugar on his weetabix. It's, what, 20 cals a tsp? big deal - and as for your tendency to be sturdy? having a massive deal over adding a bit of sugar to wet cardboard is guaranteed to get them down the newsagents inhaling curlywurlies with their pocket money.

exoticfruits · 15/03/2011 18:26

I don't think that the principle is the same. If a visitor requests something that you never stock you can't supply it. Everyone has some sugar in the house-unless you are a very bad host and are going to tell everyone that they should have tea or coffee without.

LadyOfTheManor · 15/03/2011 18:32

YANBU, it's your house, your rules. tell him to "jog" "on". Grin