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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think dh shouldn't go visit his mother tomorrow if bil and sil are going to be sitting in first class and he's in standard with our daughter?

35 replies

indiechick · 11/03/2011 21:45

DH is going up north tomorrow to visit MIL with our dd1. I'm at home with dd2 who's ill. BIL and SIL are going too. They want to go on same train but have just texted to say they're upgrading to first class. DH can't afford to upgrade (makes the day trip ridiculously expensive) so now faces the prospect of meeting them at station, getting on train, travelling separately and then getting bus at other end to MIL's house. What's the point? Why can't they just sit in standard with dd1 and DH? I know it's not major in the grand scheme of things, but why do they have to be such pains?!

OP posts:
cumfy · 12/03/2011 00:02

I'm curious .....

What were the original arrangements ?

Has it got anything to do with the fact that originally your family would have been sat together as a foursome, but now you've dropped out, it somewhat "forces" bil sil to sit in the foursome ?

Just a wild wild speculation. :o

maddy68 · 12/03/2011 09:44

Think you are bvu. Up to them how they get there

rainbowinthesky · 12/03/2011 09:47

Sounds like they dont actually want to sit with your dh and dd. If I were your dh I'd book a different train.

Georgimama · 12/03/2011 09:50

You can upgrade to weekend first on virtually every network for £10, £15 or £20 depending on the length of the journey. I always upgrade at weekends - with DS in tow. Standard class is horrible.

Oh, YABU by the way.

AllDirections · 12/03/2011 09:52

YANBU. It's very rude of them to do this and if I was them I'd pay for your DH and DD to upgrade also. If I couldn't afford it then I'd sit in standard with my family.

SuchProspects · 12/03/2011 10:04

If your BIL does this when he knows your DH won't then your BIL is being rude and unfriendly. That is fairly typical in some families but not a nice dynamic. Nevertheless not going would be churlish, and also rude to your MIL. You should just rant about him behind his back and not let him know what your travel arrangements are in the future,

HecateTheCrone · 12/03/2011 10:04

Grin you daftie.

I'm sorry that you can't afford for your husband and daughter to travel first class. (have you found out exactly how much it is and know you can't afford it, or are you just assuming?) I understand that that is what is bothering you. Maybe you're a bit jealous?

But as you know, it really doesn't matter.

Your daughter will have a fun time on the train with her dad, 1:1 time. and they will be spending time with these people when they get where they are going.

It is never good to wish other people to not have something because you can't. By all means wish that you too could have it, but don't wish that others would go without.

Maylee · 12/03/2011 10:09

Sorry that you can't afford to upgrade. I do however refer you to my 'suck it up' thread Grin

edam · 12/03/2011 10:14

It's a bit rude. First class is SO much nicer. I used to have free first class as my father worked for British Rail but the swines took it away from me when I grew up and no longer counted as a dependent. Tried to persuade dh to get a job with a railway company but he wasn't interested.

Bluemoonrising · 12/03/2011 10:14

I find it bizarre that you can't stand bil, but yet want your dd and dh to spend time on the train with him.

Are you currently hormonal?

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