To think DH needs to sort this out and stop frightening me?

[SeeJaneKick]

Since we first met he's had weird "episodes" in his sleep. We've been together for 9 years and married for 6...he has always had these episodes when he is asleep in bed with me and he will get out of bed and start pacing up and down the room agressively....or he'll jump out of bed and start kind of fighting something/someone that's not there...all this is at midnight or the small hours.

He has been known to pull the entire curtains off the window including the pole.

He had a nap just now because he couldnt sleep last night...and the next thing I know is that there's an almghty bang and a crash from upstairs and it's him...he'd fallen off the TOP OF THE DESK in the office. I went in and he leaped up and squared up to me! He woke up when I spoke to him.

He's done similar before. I want him to see the GP as in my opnion he needs a sleep clinic....we have DC and I am always afraid they'll wake up afraid...or they might get in his way. He is asleep during the episodes but looks awake...what are these? Night terrors? Sleepwalking?

He has also grabbed me in bed whilst asleep....he never remembers...this has only happened a couple of times.

I hate it. He doesn't want to see the GP for some reason.

People have been killed by their partners with this disorder. I would get it sorted, pronto

its not just about HIM is it

Hibu. He's a danger to himself and others.

Yes get it sorted ASAP.

I think he really needs to see someone. I don't want to sound all melodramatic and alarmist but wasn't there a case recently where a husband strangled his wife in his sleep, thinking their caravan was being broken into? He was either not charged with murder or found not guilty as he was genuinely asleep at the time.

This does sound worrying, he could hurt someone, including himself.

bloody hell!!

yes,what cybil said....sounds bad!

They have heard it all before. They won't think it's odd. They won't think he's mentally 'unstable'.

Better to get it seen to now than to break a leg falling, or worse, end up accidentally hurting you or the DCs.

YANBU. He's an accident waiting to happen and it's only a matter of time before he does himself or you serious damage. Why does he object to going to his GP? He has absolutely nothing to worry about - he won't be judged.

Tell him he has to see the GP, no arguments, no negotiation, you are finding this frightening and he has to get it sorted. I don't know what is going on, I have some experience of night terrors and sleep apnoea in our household and life is so much nicer when they are dealt with. You have to make him realise how important it is to get help over something which might be able to be sorted out relatively easily.

get it sorted, he is a danger to himself and his family

YANBU he needs a sleep clinic for sure.

The most responsible thing he can do, as a husband and Dad, is to get the GP appointment, pronto. This is serious.

Show him this thread.

Bloody hell you have put with this for years?? I'd be freaked out everytime i went to bed! Night terrors is one thing, but this is scary and needs sorting asap!

Actually, if he's getting aggressive and can't remember it, then it is dangerous for the children as well as you. He HAS to do this for their sakes, perhaps putting it like that will push him into seeking help.

Yanbu but if he refuses I would be tempted to try and somehow record an episode so he can see himself being violent it may shock him into action if he sees that he could potentially hurt someone.

Does anyone know what it is called? If I can name it, I think he might feel better about the GP...

Diagnosing exactly what the problem is will be the job of the sleep clinic. All he needs to do is visit the GP with you, so you can explain how he's behaving whilst 'asleep'.

YANBU Jane.

When I was at uni I shared with a bloke, 'Tim'. One night I woke up at about 2am to find a naked man standing in the door of my room. It was Tim. He came around side of my bed, drank all the water in my glass, came around the other, got into bed with me, kissed me on the cheek, and settled in.

All totally silently. It was the freakiest thing that had ever happened to me.

Nowhere near as dramatic as your DH's issues: he definitely needs to get things sorted. How old are your DCs? How long till they get really terrified by finding Daddy in their room at three in the morning fighting something?

Fernie that is an excellent idea. I saw a programme once about this, I think they do record you at sleep clinics, and this guy was gobsmacked at what he did.

REM Sleep Behaviour Disorder ?

I've heard of this before, normally when we dream our bodies sort of become paralyzed to stop us acting our dreams but not so for people with this disorder.

Scary! It sounds like night terrors. My old housemate used to suffer from them. Your husband really, really needs to see somebody straight away before he hurts himself or somebody else.

I just mentioned sleep clinic to him and h seems more sensible now...phoning doc in the morning. It IS scary. The worst one he knocked a great big bump on his head fighting something in our tiny downstairs toilet.

I do similar though not so violent. I upset DH most nights though by sitting up in bed apparantly with my eyes open (he thinks I'm awake) and telling him to fuck off, etc. I have no memory of this in the morning.

I get out of bed in the night and run round the house in a panic in my sleep maybe once or twice a month. I did it a couple of nights ago and was running about screaming hte house was on fire. I woke up when DH told me to shut up. I normally run round the bedroom screaming that there are ants in the bed. Never attacked anyone though.

Checking links now thank you.