To be irritated beyond words by DH and his Self Help books?

[SeeJaneKick]

He's always read them...I think they're a pile of shit. Sorry...I know I ABU...but they're such a MASSIVE waste of time!

He's sitting there...reading some crap about training your brain to behave in a certain way...to make himself be more go-getting....when he could get up and actually DO something!

I get MAD at this...he reads loads of them and when I first met him he had these special tapes he would listen to at night i bed while he slept...which put positive messages in his head.

Just bloody live ffs! Get on with it!

I just said "Why don't you make that phone call that you've been meaning to do for weeks instead of reading about how to get the energy to do it...get up and DO it."

And he lost his plot.

I think the books are just a distraction. Fooling people into thinking they're "improving" themmselves when they should just get of their arses and live.

He has a day off and wastes it.

Come on, come on! Tell me how U I am being!

" and when I first met him he had these special tapes he would listen to at night i bed while he slept...which put positive messages in his head.

Just bloody live ffs! Get on with it!"

why did you marry him then!!!???

O I know I know! He's lovely...that's why.

But these bloody books are an embarrasment!

I hate seeing them rowed up on he shelves...which are otherwise full of good fiction, classics and non fiction books....those things he reads...well if they worked hed have stopped after 2 or 3 of them wouldn't he!!

He'd be so busy succeeding in life that he wouldn't have TIME to read more drivel spouted by people with dodgy degrees in even dodgier subjects!

No YANBU. I think to be honest you either have got the get up and go or your haven't. I love reading it distracts me from all sorts of things I really should be getting on with!

His hobby!

My God.

Maybe I will begin encouraging him to write his own then...or training as a life coach.

lol

He/they are not embarrassing. Self help is a billion pound industry so he isn't the only one. If they help then they aren't doing any harm. But if they are actually keeping him away from the real issues he needs to face then that's different.

It's BECAUSE they're a billion pound industry that they're embarrasing! Who buys into that crap?

Yanbu - you could to a degree be talking about my DH.

It drove me mad with the books and the Emails. It did however get him to enrol at college and eventually out to the job he is doing now. Sooo I suppose there is that but it irritated me beyond belief.

No amount of my saying that if you need a blueprint for life then you aren't actually living it made a difference.

With work and the children he is now too knackered to read them soo alls well

My sister used to be like this, and she really did train to be a life coach!
She got bored eventually, doesn?t mention them now

What sort of titles?

Back off "The Secret".
The rest? Meh

I think a lot of them make us feel inadequate, eg.

'How to earn megabucks in your sleep while making friends and losing weight' etc. Well not exactly, but you know what I mean. It's all about being high flying, driven, entrepreneurial, inspirational, smart working super people. Some of us are more suited to being ordinary people with ordinary jobs and doing them well. I think that there is still an awful lot of pressure on men to be Duncan Bannatyne (but better looking).

Oh God The Frigging Secret. Arghh

And anything by multi millionaire, fist pumping nightmare Tony Robbins. Grrr.

These are the sort of books that turn people in to armchair experts and are written in the main by people who are armchair experts themselves....

YANBU

I think that type of book can be useful if they make you look at situations in a different way and you're the sort of person that acts on what you've read.

I read some a few years ago, but they didn't work with me. I'm still crap at most things.

When you met him you knew that he done this, yet here you are god knows how far down the line moaning about it.

If it is that bad up and leave him then, or why did you ever marry him to start with.

Think yourself lucky he don't beat the crap out of you and not work and leave you on the breadline.

Its his hobby, get over it.

YANBU, DH has a lazy arse best friend. His conversation seems to consistent entirely of 'oh, once I have decorated the house, I will then open up my own business, then teach my DS ancient Mandarin'

In reality, in the past 15 years I have known him he has actually doen bugger all, has a crappy low paid job, and talks about his grand plans but does nothing.

they are v irritating

at least your whole family isn't into them , in fact, one of my family members has just started writing them! I think I must be adopted.

most of my family live abroad so I buy the books for them and post them. So now every time I log into amazon, I am bombarded by books on my homepage like 'THINK YOURSELF THIN/RICH/INTELLIGENT/BEAUTIFUL' (delete as appropriate) which I find immsensely irritating!

As someone else said, it's like a hobby for him, probably less annoying than some 'normal' hobbies (always makes me think of jura was it, and her husband bringing boats inside their house to paint lol)

Gawd fabby!

Motivational books are interesting I guess, for a time and in their place - not too long though! Not a lifestyle for goodness sake. Bit addictive, no? Also feeds the rampant individualism that is the scourge of the west.

(gawd *smoking!)

One thing you may know for sure, he will never have an affair. Never decide to take up extreme sports. Never jump out of an airplane for fun.

Though, the day he starts reading "Conquering Everest" or "Cycling the Rockie Mountains" you should perhaps get worried.

It's his day off and you're dictating how he spends it? And you're asking 'AIBU'? Don't know if you started this thread to be tongue-in-cheek but it doesn't come across that way.

Why don't YOU go and do something instead of wasting his day off telling him what he should be doing?

I'd get worried if he starts reading anything by Ron L. Hubbard.

YANBU. Especially if he reads you exerpts.