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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not take a friends child to a party if she cant find me a booster seat to use?

31 replies

Foxy800 · 25/02/2011 23:06

I dont think I am but partners friend thinks I am. She text me and asked if I could take her dd to a party tomorrow, her dd is 7, I have said I will but only if she has a car seat or booster seat. So at moment am both trying to use one but have said without one will not take her dd.

OP posts:
OhCobblers · 25/02/2011 23:14

YADNBU
i would never take a child of this age in a car without a car/booster seat.
it doesn't matter how short the distance; i would stick to my guns and say No.

HTH Smile

alicet · 25/02/2011 23:15

I would say the same. Presumably she has got one that she uses for her dd though so you can borrow this when you pick her up / she drops her off?

COCKadoodledooo · 25/02/2011 23:16

It's legal without for a one off short journey afaik.

BooyFuckingHoo · 25/02/2011 23:17

YANBU

i doubt she would expect you to drive her DD without one. would she?

MotherJack · 25/02/2011 23:23

Cockadoodle.... the circumstances have to exceptional and not pre-planned such as this. The driver bears the responsibility, so I wouldn't. I have ferried my own son in exceptional circumstances on a cushion before but I would not do that for another person's child unless there were truly exceptional circumstances which I felt I could defend. I would say Foxy's circs did not fit this category.

abbierhodes · 25/02/2011 23:24

YANBU but why is this an issue? Why can't you just borrow hers?

somersetmum · 25/02/2011 23:28

How tall is she? It is quite possible for a 7 year-old to be over 135cm tall and, therefore, not require a carseat or booster. My dd is this age and she and the majority of her friends are over the height requirement.

SeeJaneKick · 25/02/2011 23:51

If the OP friend does not drive then it is perfectly plausible she has no seat. She may need to travel in cas rarely...and not have the cash for a seat.

I only go in cars when I am offered a lift. Rarely. We walk or get the bus everywhere. We have no seat.

OP can you not help her to find one?

Original poster
Foxy800 · 26/02/2011 08:26

Thanks guys, she sdoesnt drive so doesnt own one or it wouldnt be an issue but as I am taking my dd as well who is 4 she is unable to borrow hers.

Am trying to find one and she is trying to find one but just feel really guilty that her dd may have to miss out on the party if have no luck but will not take any child in the car without one.

OP posts:
Original poster
Foxy800 · 26/02/2011 08:28

Trouble is cause she only text me at 11om last night not many people i can call at this time on a Saturday morning.

OP posts:
TallulahDoesTheHula · 26/02/2011 08:30

I thought it was about age 7 that they stopped needing a seat? How tall is the child?

purplepidjin · 26/02/2011 08:35

YANBU

I took my (non-driving) mate and her kids to soft play last week, as a half term treat - there are no soft plays near us that are on a decent bus or train route. We had a booster for the 3yo, but i still spent time on ebay looking for a proper car seat for under £20!

Legally it's your responsibility as driver, so if you're not prepared to do it don't. You'd insist on a seatbelt as an essential piece of safety equipment Wink

Original poster
Foxy800 · 26/02/2011 08:36

She is short for her age and she may even be younger than 7, she is the dd of my partners friend so dont know exactly how old she is, just guessign at seven. She definately isnt 135cms though.

OP posts:
Dylthan · 26/02/2011 08:38

Sorry I wouldn't take a child without a seat either I really hope you can find one

Yanbu

LineRunner · 26/02/2011 08:38

It's a height issue so the child doesn't risk slipping under the seat belt if there's a collision. Bigger Tescos and Asdas and other big stores sell booster seats, by the way. I don't have a car but always had a booster seat in the house in case of taxi rides, lifts from friends, etc. And no, YANBU because if you get stopped by the police you as the driver will be held responsible. And, as the police officer will no doubt tell you, if you have a crash or even a shunt, the child could be badly hurt.

Original poster
Foxy800 · 26/02/2011 08:39

Thanks guys. If I cant find one in the next hour will have to say I cant do it especially as its a 20 min drive both ways, not that I would do for a shorter journey either.

OP posts:
b1uebells · 26/02/2011 08:42

Where are you OP? I know it's a long shot that we may be near eachother but you are more than welcome to borrow one of mine. Am in Hertfordshire

Original poster
Foxy800 · 26/02/2011 08:42

Thanks LineRunner, unfortunaltey cant get to a big tesco or asda due to short notice as my dd has a dance class first. We do have a booster seat we can use as spare but it is the grandparents who live 5 mins down the road but due to late night text not been able to get hold of them yet, not early birds at the weekend. If I can get hold can pick up on way back from dance class to collect child. If she had texted yesterday daytime could have collected it no problems!!

OP posts:
Original poster
Foxy800 · 26/02/2011 08:43

Thank you so much b1uebells but Im in Surrey.

OP posts:
purplepidjin · 26/02/2011 09:19

To me it sounds as though you are going well above and beyond for someone's DH's friend's cat's auntie's cousin's pet goldfish... At the very least you are a lovely person!

GiddyPickle · 26/02/2011 09:22

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

seeker · 26/02/2011 09:26

If you've got a spare one 5 minutes down the road I can;t see a problem.

shirazgirl · 26/02/2011 09:27

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

melpomene · 26/02/2011 09:28

YANBU but it should be her parents' responsibility to arrange for a booster seat. They are fairly cheap so - unless this childs parents on a very low income - it would make sense for them to buy one for their dd to use when she gets lifts from people.

Seona1973 · 26/02/2011 09:32

I got a basic booster seat as a spare for when taking my sisters kids anywhere - it was about £8 from tesco so your friend doesnt really have an excuse for not having one. It is her responsibility to have one in case her dd needs a lift, not yours.