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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be miffed at friend's response to

64 replies

Maud2011 · 25/02/2011 20:45

my request that she does not text me between 11pm and 8am?

She's woken me twice this week, once just after midnight, this morning at 6.50 so earlier this pm I texted my request, pointing out that I'd been asleep when she texted.

Her response? "OK re texts".

Now perhaps I'm self important and precious or something but I did expect an apology of sorts - not a full blown grovelling on knees apology - merely a simple "sorry" or an acknowledgement that it wasn't the most considerate time to text and it was somewhat annoying for me to have been woken up? All in order to discuss when next to meet in our local?

"OK re texts" sounds like she's granting me a favour. I'm pretty Angrybut can't help Grining too!

OP posts:
CMOTdibbler · 25/02/2011 20:59

My phone will switch itself on to do the alarm, so try switching it off

thefirstMrsDeVere · 25/02/2011 20:59

I am a bit suprised by some responses. Maybe its cos I am old and gimmery Grin.

I wouldnt phone anyone after 9pm or before 9am unless it was an emergency. I apply the same rules to texts/mobile calls.

If I get a very early or late phone call it takes me hours to calm down afterwards (not neurotic, lots of horrible things have happened).

verytellytubby · 25/02/2011 21:00

Put your phone on silent!

mmsmum · 25/02/2011 21:00

Comical? Our sense of humour must be completely different!

The alarm on my phone still goes off when I turn messages to silent, I bet yours would too

hairymelons · 25/02/2011 21:01

Your alarm should go off even when your phone is on silent. It's not worth falling out over. Don't mean to patronise but are other things stressing you out atm? Otherwise, bit of an overreaction and a bit U.

As for your friend, maybe she didn't like being ticked off so didn't feel like apologising.

Librashavinganotherbiscuit · 25/02/2011 21:01

Actually I'm with the OP on this, if someone said I had woken them up with a text then I would have apologised (and meant it). I do think texting (or phoning) between 11pm and 7am is rude. And as for the turn it off or put it on silent brigade that's not always possible, when DH is away I ask him to leave his phone on so if there is an emergency I can get hold of him. Plenty of people would leave there phone on if they are emergency contacts for elderly parents say.

YANBU.

Original poster
Maud2011 · 25/02/2011 21:02

Fourleaf, sorry but what's HTH, that's not an acronym I've come across before...

OP posts:
LordVolAuVent · 25/02/2011 21:03

all the phones i've ever had maud, work as an alarm even if on silent or turned off. test it. if she's like me, your friend probably just texts when she thinks about it, or when she has a second so it's done. Otherwise i forget or never get round to it!!

Original poster
Maud2011 · 25/02/2011 21:06

HairyMelons, I didn't "tick her off" in my text, simply asked her if she could please not text me during those hours... you are right though, I am bit stressed generally and this particular friendship is one that causes me a bit of grief from time to time, much though I enjoy her company when we get together.

OP posts:
TheNoodlesIncident · 25/02/2011 21:06

Digital alarm clocks don't tick. If you get one of those you could leave your mobile on, but in another room downstairs.

Not sure why you felt an apology was in order though? Because an incoming text message woke you up before 8 a.m.? You'll probably find the rest of the world couldn't care less about your sleep and wake you up being its usual noisy self anyhow.

TheNoodlesIncident · 25/02/2011 21:08

Hope This Helps Grin

itsalarf · 25/02/2011 21:10

YABU. I think mobiles are different to landlines in that the responsibility belongs to the owner to switch them off at inappropriate times such as meetings, appointments and when you want to sleep. Also, your friend cannot be bothered texting a long reply to someone who does not want her texts in the first place!

unfitmother · 25/02/2011 21:13

YABU, IMHO, to expect an apology.

Panzee · 25/02/2011 21:17

I leave my phone on in case someone wants to call in an emergency, illness, death etc. I hate it when people text in the night.

But don't panic - she's said ok and hopefully that'll be it.

fangbanger · 25/02/2011 21:23

what was she texting you at such ridiculous times?
Unless it was important i would be surprised to receive a text after about 10pm unless it was part of a conversation i had already been having.

itsalarf · 25/02/2011 21:54

Would an emergency not come to your landline? Obviously, if you don't have one, it is different. However texts sometimes take forever to come through, so if your phone is on at night, they can arrive anyway.

HelenBaaBaaBlackSheep · 25/02/2011 22:06

I ta nnoys me a bit whne people text very late because I usually forget to turn my phone off but I think it's my responsibility to do it.

You can turn texts to silent and still have calls ringing out.

COCKadoodledooo · 25/02/2011 22:08

Meh. Leave your phone on silent overnight.

Hope she sent her reply inside permitted hours!

PickleSarnie · 25/02/2011 22:18

YANBU.

What need is there to send a text after 11pm? unless there's an emergency. In which case you would want phone on to hear calls.

freebreeze · 25/02/2011 23:01

O well it's really no big deal, is it? Move on girl!!

BaroqueAroundTheClock · 25/02/2011 23:04

All 3 of the phones in this house can be switched off and the alarm still goes off, likewise on "silent" - the alarm clock still works - but texts are silent.

Pancakeflipper · 26/02/2011 10:36

Baroque - same in our household. I don't think I have the most technically adavanced top of the range mobile facilities.... I presume most are capable of this.

I generally have loads of texts in the morning due to family and friends abroad - rather than phoning and waking me up...

BaroqueAroundTheClock · 26/02/2011 10:37

I know one of ours isn't techincall advanced - it'as a Nokia 1208 Grin

squeakytoy · 26/02/2011 10:43

switch the sound off on texts

piprabbit · 26/02/2011 10:44

I'd always apologise if I unknowingly woke someone, it would seem to be the courteous thing to do. When our babies were small, I'd sometimes catch a friend having an afternoon nap - completely unpredictable time, but I'd still say 'Oh, I'm sorry for waking you'.

I assume that you can put ringtones on silent overnight - but still have your alarm clock functioning as normal?

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