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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

in wanting a tattoo or is my Mum

58 replies

lauraloo09 · 23/02/2011 21:48

hiya

this sounds a bit silly and immature, as i'm 27, but wondering what you would do.
i have always fancied getting a tattoo on the back of my shoulder and, although sometimes I've wanted things like a love heart or shamrock, I would love the logo for the karate organisation I have been a member of for 16 years. However my mum has told me tonight not to get a tattoo of something so silly and tattoos are horrible. The logo is very tasteful www.shotobudo.org (I think, its just the black figures in the link provided) and wouldnt look too bad. I do respect my mums opinion as we have a wonderful relationship but i dont know what to do :( any help would be great!

OP posts:
jalopy · 23/02/2011 22:39

Your mum's got sense. Listen to her.

mellicauli · 23/02/2011 22:42

Wny do you want a tattoo?

PaisleyLeaf · 23/02/2011 22:45

It'd look more tasteful if the character on the left wasn't fiddling with their crotch.

CarnivalBizarre · 23/02/2011 22:50

You are old enough to please yourself - your body and all that blah blah blah but I would just like to make the point that my son had a large tattoo which he absolutely loved on his upper arm when he was 18, didn't like it by the time he was 19 and now at 20 he is looking into having it removed by laser .....just something to consider

NoSuchThingAsSociety · 23/02/2011 22:57

Your body, your decision.

Very common, though.

monkeyjamtart · 23/02/2011 23:08

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Joolyjoolyjoo · 23/02/2011 23:09

It depends. I have 2 tattoos, and , if I'm honest, I probably wouldn't choose to have those particular two tattoos again, but I still love them. I love them because they are a snapshot reminder of the times in my life when I had them done. Noone really sees them unless I want them to, but they are part of me that will always be 21/25, and I have no real regrets. They certainly have not blighted my life in any way. In a way, they are just like the birthmark I have behind my knee- not necessarily my best feature, but just part of me.

My mum was like yours, and didn't know about my first tattoo for 2 years. She only saw it because I was just out of the shower, and started giving me a lecture about how only "stupid" people have tattoos. I pointed out that I was not stupid, and if having a tatto suddenly turned me stupid, she would surely have noticed my dramatic decrease in brainpower 2 years earlier! I also pointed out that even if her continued rant DID manage to change my mind, there was nothing either of us could do about it, and suggested she try to forget it.

And yeah, blah blah, by the time I'm in a nursing home etc....By the time I am resigned to having to have my saggy old droopy body lowered into a bath by someone, I think honestly my tattoos will be pretty low on my list of worries!

Agree you should think about it, but don't agree it needs to be a big deal. If it's not going to be visible all the time, you won't even remember it's there half the time.

But then, i'm dead common me Wink

Edinburghlass · 24/02/2011 20:38

Please don't. I know a few people with tattoos and most of them regret it. Just think what it'll look like when you're old and saggy........

worraliberty · 24/02/2011 20:44

Oh no and especially not on the back of your shoulder Sad

I was one of 4 bridesmaids last year and the only one including the bride who didn't have a tattoo. We walked down the aisle with beautiful, tasteful designer dresses and all I could see in front of me was Winnie the Pooh, Dolphins, barb wire and a Chinese symbol that for all the bridesmaid new could have meant 'chicken chow mein and pork balls'

It spoilt the whole look to be honest and chav was an understatment.

SunshineisSorry · 24/02/2011 20:52

I have several tattoos, if i had my life over again i wouldn't neccesarily have the ones i have now, i would have put ALOT more thought into them. I don't regret them for a second, i have my breast tattood, my arm, my shoulder and my thigh - they remind me that once upon a time, i was a bit of a rebel Grin and i am fond of them.

They do make me look a bit chavvy but i don't care - judge me? Then you aint worth my time anyway. My tattoos are not visible, apart from the one on the top of my arm but i never feel the need to hide it, but i do, because i hide my bingo wings!!!

My DD has tattoos, she has a tattoo on her neck Hmm and i was Sad that she got this, but its her body, her choice - I don't think she will regret it. Whats the point? Its part of who she is now and im pretty bloody proud of my feisty headstrong DD, one day im hoping she will look back and think - yaaay rock n roll, when she is busy with nappies and M&T small talk!

I say go for it - just dont tell yer mum lol x

2rebecca · 24/02/2011 21:26

If I had a tattoo I'd have it somewhere hidden as I agree with worraliberty.
My opinion however should be irrelevent to you if you really want a tattoo, as should everyone else's opinion here and your mum's.
If you are that unsure about it don't have one.
Having a tattoo should be like getting married, having a baby and getting sterilised. Something you do when you are sure you want to do it, not something you get opinions on.

Blatherskite · 24/02/2011 21:43

Tattoo fine but not that one and not in that place.

As others have said a) that logo looks like someone giving a lesson on where a clit is and b) your shoulder is a very 'public' place. Never again will you be able to wear a swimming costume, vest top or posh dress without showing the world your tattoo - and inviting thier opinion.

Hint from a friend though - low down on your tummy is not a good spot either. 2 kids later and her japanese order for egg fried rice design doesn't look so pretty anymore :)

Flisspaps · 24/02/2011 21:43

YABU for asking. You are 27. If you want it get it.

QuinionsRainbow · 25/02/2011 12:10

"The logo is very tasteful , , and wouldn't look too bad."

I think I would want a tattoo to look rather better than "not too bad" before going for one!

EauRouge · 25/02/2011 12:23

You don't sound like you're sure about it so I wouldn't do it. I agree that the logo looks like the one on the left is fiddling with its crotch. Not good.

Suchffun · 25/02/2011 12:30

PMSL at the crotch fiddling logo! I wouldn't have noticed but as soon as someone points it out its all you can see. (Like the Olympic 2012 = Lisa Simpson performing a BJ.)

I don't really like tattoos although I used to. Back of your shoulder seems daft as you'll never see it (unless you have a lot of mirrors or a giraffe neck).

But at the end of the day its up to you not your mum. I'd like my DD to respect my opinion even when she's 27 though and I think its great that you respect your mum that way. I bet she is very proud Smile

LeroyJethroGibbs · 25/02/2011 12:31

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

allsquareknickersnofurcoat · 25/02/2011 12:33

"And yeah, blah blah, by the time I'm in a nursing home etc....By the time I am resigned to having to have my saggy old droopy body lowered into a bath by someone, I think honestly my tattoos will be pretty low on my list of worries!"

Hear hear Jooly !!

I have a large tattoo on my back and am getting another one soon. I would say it doesnt hurt as much as you think, but I think I have a high pain threshold? To me it felt like being rubbed with sandpaper...

If you want it, do it, its nothing to do with your mum. But you have to be positive that you want it, and I dont think you are, or you wouldnt be posting

TobyLerone · 25/02/2011 12:38

I love my tattoos and have never regretted having them done. But the fact that you have changed your mind in the past about what you want is a slight concern. How sure are you that you won't change your mind again?

Mine are all in places I can easily cover unless I'm wearing a bikini/underwear. Any future tattoos I might get will be equally easy to cover if need be.

And it hurts! Not unbearably -- I quite like it, in fact. But like a burning, scratching pain. What you're considering looks like an hour's work or less (depending on how big you want it), but be prepared for it to hurt more than you had expected.

I agree, though. Your mother has no say in this unless she provides a roof over your head and food on your table.

Granny23 · 25/02/2011 12:40

If in doubt, do nout!

privategodfrey · 25/02/2011 12:43

I've got 3 tattoos (arm, shoulder, wrist) and the only one I regret is the one on my arm which I had done when I was 14 (yeah, I know).

I've since had that one covered up however I'm still a bit about it and wish I'd never had it done in the first place.

The one on my shoulder is a small red rose which was done 25 years ago. I had it re-coloured and outlined a few years ago so it still looks fresh.

The one on my wrist I had done a few months ago after my Mum died. It's her name in Manchurian script (probably says Bob or Ting Tong but hey, it's symbolic to me!) and I love it, I honestly don't think I will ever regret it.

Having said that, I don't personally like the design you have chosen and you certainly don't sound very sure that you like it that much either.

paulapantsdown · 25/02/2011 12:47

you are 27 - do what you like

tatoos are ugly and common though

OTheHugeManatee · 25/02/2011 12:48

I think tattoos are naffola. But it's your skin, why should your mother have any say in how you adorn it?

randomimposter · 25/02/2011 12:51

Tattoos can look lovely.

Mostly though IMO they look a bit cheap, a bit "look at me" and a bit "I'm a sheep".

They last forever, and to be frank I've never seen them look good on an older skin.

But as someone else said, my opinion matters even less than your mum's. FWIW I would listen to your mum in this scenario. But I'm not you. Obviously.

GloriaSmut · 25/02/2011 13:04

If you are uncertain about getting a tattoo then you really shouldn't have one done. I'm not overly taken with the suggested design either.

I'm not against tattoos and I like mine very much indeed but it was carefully chosen and placed. I'm increasingly not liking the fashion for tattooing your tits - it makes people look like transvestite mariners - and I'm afraid it doesn't look "rock chick" or whatever, it looks sold gold chav.