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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To think, that from a young age children should be taught to behave properly around dogs?

102 replies

webbygeek91 · 20/02/2011 17:04

We are expected to be responsible dog owners, pick up, train them and keep them under control/well cared for, why don't parents teach their kids not to run screaming around dogs or run over to them and start trying to tug their tails/ride on them?

Also, to expect that kids should not be walking dogs on their own or at a significant distance from their parents with a dog that is:

A) Heavier than them
B) Has serious behaviour issues
C) A & B combined means said child has no control over dog.

OP posts:

BooyFuckingHoo · 20/02/2011 17:06

YANBU at all, i think everyone should have basic awareness of how to behave around dogs if only for the fact that there are so many dogs so they will at some point come into contact with them.

LadyOfTheManor · 20/02/2011 17:07

Perhaps dogs should be trained to be around children?

Can of worms comes to mind.

squeakytoy · 20/02/2011 17:09

YANBU.

I was outside the supermarket the other day and a small child who couldnt have been more than 7 was desperately trying to keep control of a very bouncy labrador. The dog was only being friendly, but wanted to lunge at anyone who walked by.

The parent had vanished in the shop.

A woman with a small child of about 2yrs old almost pulled her kids arms out of its sockets to keep it away from the dog, then screamed at the poor little boy to control it, and then as I was the nearest adult, glared at me too!

I distracted the dog by stroking it, and asked the child where his dad was. And I showed the boy how to wrap the lead around his wrist so that he wouldnt let the dog free.

I was fuming at the parent for leaving this child and dog like this. And I felt I was having to put myself into an awkward position by talking to this child, who shouldnt be encouraged to talk to strangers.. but equally I felt I had to help rather than see an accident happen.

BooyFuckingHoo · 20/02/2011 17:09

responsible dog owners do socialise their dogs properly lady and those that aren't good with children shouldn't be around them.

BooyFuckingHoo · 20/02/2011 17:11

gosh squeaky that was a terrible responsibility the parent was putting on the child and not very nice for him to have been screamed at by a stranger.

LadyOfTheManor · 20/02/2011 17:11

The key word is responsible.

My ds is 1 and my mum has an Alsation and two Westies, he has been badgered into not smacking the dogs in the face, pulling their tails etc. Responsible parenting comes into it too though, if you don't want a dog to maul your child, don't leave a child with a dog.

I hate it when I see photographs of people and their children, with the child "balanced" on the dog in some description

My dh won't allow us to have a dog until ds is at least 18 months old.

Notalone · 20/02/2011 17:13

YADNBU. We have a lovely border collie - fantastic around our Ds and visiting children but when outside on a lead he hates children running up to him screaming or prodding him. We have taught our Ds from a young ages that if you want to stroke a dog you ask their owner first, that you don't approach a dog without an owner present (ie tied up outside a shop etc), that you don't annoy / prod / poke any dog and that you don't interrupt a sleeping or eating dog. However the amount of children who have run up to our dog screaming (which to a dog seems aggressive) or who have stroked him without asking us first. It doesn't matter whether you have a dog or not - ALL kids will meet dogs at some point in their lives. We teach them road sense, strange danger etc and I feel training then on how to behave around dogs is also very important.

LadyoftheManor - what a ridiculous comment. The debate is not whether dogs should be trained - that is a no brainer.

OmniaParatus · 20/02/2011 17:14

I teach my kids to behave round dogs, but have trouble because we don't have a dog! We visit my niece sometimes, she has a bulldog cross and it is helpful for both her dogs and my kids to get used to each other.

Perhaps the solution is play dates?

BooyFuckingHoo · 20/02/2011 17:14

it is right that he is told not to smack them and pull their tails, that is i think what OP is referring to. children need to know that poking and pulling is dangerous and they could get hurt. also agree that DCs shouldn't be alone with dogs.

MogadoredMemoo · 20/02/2011 17:15

I disagree tbh and I am a dog owner. You're the one who decided to get a dog and so the responsibility lies with you.

GnomeDePlume · 20/02/2011 17:15

Even if taught, young children forget things in the heat of the moment. A child can run near a dog to collect a ball. The child is not necessarily aware of the dog so wont know to modify their behaviour.

I agree that children should not be put in charge of a dog they cannot control. If the dog has behaviour problems then it should be muzzled in public. This is the fault of the parents not the child.

Plonker · 20/02/2011 17:15

YANBU

It's a life skill like many others as far as I'm concerned.

IMO, by the same tone, owners of dogs raised in households without children (therefore not a natural progression of socialisation) should make a concerted effort to ensure that their dogs have been properly socialised and taught how to be around children.

Blackduck · 20/02/2011 17:16

Noatalone - exactly what I was going to say. Ds has been brought up with a dog, but he knows not to approach/touch another dog without checking with the owner first. Not all dogs are friendly and not all dogs liked to be stroked - this can be for all sorts of reasons (including them being badly treated previously). Dogs are not toys and should not be treated as such.

BooyFuckingHoo · 20/02/2011 17:17

mogadore would you take repsonsibility for you dog snapping at a child who had pulled it's tail and screamed in it's ear?

Notalone · 20/02/2011 17:18

Mog - ALL dogs should be trained. Every single one. But I have seen children do some ridiculous things around dogs and I have also seen some adults who think it is ok for their child to climb all over dogs or treat them as a toy. This can put the child at risk because even the most trained, placid dog can bite back if they are being hurt or "ridden" like a horse. Children should be taught how to behave in all types of situations and being around a dog is one such situation imo.

PeeringIntoTheWintryVoid · 20/02/2011 17:19

YANBU!

Notalone · 20/02/2011 17:19

Blackduck

Vallhala · 20/02/2011 17:22

YADamnWellNBU!

Lady, you're not wrong, we had a thread on the DogHouse not so long ago about someone complaining about the dog... having admitted to allowing the child to "climb all over" the poor bloody creature.

I must say though that if I were in your shoes I'd be a divorcee by now. There is no way I'd be told that I wasn't allowed to have a dog! :o

MogadoredMemoo · 20/02/2011 17:24

I have a dog and 5 dc. The dog would not snap, bite ect no matter what because it has been trained not to. If you choose to take your dog out in public it needs to know how to behave in public and around children who might behave badly.

southeastastra · 20/02/2011 17:24

it's easy to say but hard in reality (at least in my experience) some dogs just look dead scary and even if they're soppy things kids just can't help being scared of them.

also there are far too many bad owners now so a little caution isn't surprising is it..

BooyFuckingHoo · 20/02/2011 17:27

mogador your dog being trained is no guarantee and you are naive if you think his non snapping status is a permanent one. you are not allowing for days when your dog is feeling off form/ill/tired/over stimulated etc. you don't know when he might have had enough one day as some strange child pokes his eye. to think he will never bite when provoked is a dangerous attitude TBH.

Notalone · 20/02/2011 17:29

Agree Booy - I have heard of dogs who have been lovely and placid for years and then one day snapping because they are under the weather and someone (usually a child) has poked them, pulled their tail or stuck a finger in their ear. Children should be aware for their own protection. A dog is ALWAYS an unknown quantity.

LadyOfTheManor · 20/02/2011 17:30

Notalone Sun 20-Feb-11 17:18:33
Mog - ALL dogs should be trained. Every single one

LadyoftheManor - what a ridiculous comment. The debate is not whether dogs should be trained - that is a no brainer.

MogadoredMemoo · 20/02/2011 17:33

I get your point booy, And Tbh think any parent who doesn't teach their dc not to run over to strange dogs and poke them etc is a bit stupid really. My own dc all really love dogs but I stillake sure that they understand how to behave around them.

BooyFuckingHoo · 20/02/2011 17:35

i agree mog, which is why i think parents should take teh responsibility of their children's behaviour for their DC's own safety. i have taught my dcs how to cross the road, because as careful as all drivers may be, a child darting onto teh road makes a dangerous situation.

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