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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

in thinking valentines day is one piece of shit?

44 replies

ssd · 14/02/2011 20:50

no I'm not single or unhappy, just married, happy and getting on with it

but the older I get the more I hate valentines day, the tackiness, the pathetic cards, the all round rip off

we love each other, we don't need a £2.50 card from clintons to prove it

so IABU?

OP posts:
mozette · 14/02/2011 20:52

YANBU - load of old commercialised tosh

Buda · 14/02/2011 20:54

Well no Yanbu. I like to mark it but just with an extra kiss and a hug really. Sent DH an email this morning but he couldn't open it!

It has gotten ridiculous.

So over-commercialized.

Flojo1979 · 14/02/2011 21:04

Awwww were is your fun, next you'll want to ban xmas!!
YABU!!

fluffy91 · 14/02/2011 22:43

Yabu.
Its a bit of fun, one day a year to make a public announcement how much you love your DH/DP.

Yeah its commercialized but if the commercial stuff offends you so much make something or do something together privately instead.

Its only one day a year and i think its nice to make a big effort and reassure your other half you still appreciate them...

splashyy · 14/02/2011 23:05

yanbu in that yes it is a just another way of getting ripped off. the amount of tosh that sainsbury's et al sell!!

but yabu in that the original sentiment is worthwhile

maighdlin · 14/02/2011 23:14

YANBU me and DH only "do" valentines because its an excuse to eat. If it didn't have the nice meal attached to it we probably wouldn't bother. We don't go out, (bunged in restaurant charging twice as much for a crap set menu? no thanks) we just get our favourite things in a watch a movie.

ShowOfHands · 14/02/2011 23:17

Aah but fluffy, we make the effort to show each other we love and appreciate each other every day. Doing it because of the date on the calendar would seem ridiculous to me. And that sounds stupidly smug but it isn't meant to.

galletti · 14/02/2011 23:32

Don't think you abu, but I am of the school of thought that loves a special day - be it valentines, mothers/father's day, birthdays etc. Just days when you can have a bit of fun, and take a bit of time out. As a family we made Valentine's biscuits at the weekend, and tonight what was going to be a bit of a romantic dinner turned into special dinner for 4 - 2 adults, 2 11 yr olds, gave them a special treat of coke with their meal, whilst we opened a bottle of champagne we hade been given for Christmas. It was a lovely evening. Not bad for a Monday. Smile

BellaMagnificat · 14/02/2011 23:41

YANBU. Just a load of American-influenced commercialised crap. Like Halloween has become. And, yes Christmas. I hate that too.

sjm123 · 14/02/2011 23:48

I've always hated valentines day. When I was in a relationship I didn't need a specifically designated day to do nice things for the person I loved, and I find it all a bit tacky.

Now I've recently come out of a long term relationship, where it's all still a bit raw it's just a bit horrible and depressing.

Nasty tacky plastic day imo.

Grandmar · 14/02/2011 23:51

I hated Valentines, but today I awoke to a lovely card and a dozen red roses and the most romantic day (really this is a first in twenty years) I adored it. Romance is not in most men's nature, so perhaps they need a reminder! Viva chocs, sex, champagne, diamonds. Sorry, but these are my 'one' weakness.

allsquareknickersnofurcoat · 14/02/2011 23:52

YANBU, me and DH have done nothing this year, and I dont think we did last year...

How come it took til 8.50 for someone to start this thread though? Wink

BluddyMoFo · 14/02/2011 23:53

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Grandmar · 15/02/2011 00:04

Darling it's taken me three marriages

A1980 · 15/02/2011 00:08

YANBU

It's pile of S.H.I.T.E

Grin
fluffy91 · 15/02/2011 00:28

showofhands It doesn't sound smug and I do too, but i don't get to eat pink fondant fancies and an assortment of other cakes and biscuits and fattening foods, get/give flowers, books, photo almbums, romantic things, walk through foil balloons everyday etc.

I love Valetines Grin

GloriaSmut · 15/02/2011 00:30

YA so NBU!

It's nauseating, commercialised shyte.

StuffingGoldBrass · 15/02/2011 00:35

I am utterly indifferent to it. I remember being as obsessed as most teenagers are when I was a teenager, and in later years had a certain amount of fun with choosing cards to send to friends for maximum wind-up potential,but these days it's about as relevant to me as Diwali, Ramadan or Cup Final Day.

Psammead · 15/02/2011 08:14

I like it!

I love giving and receiving presents. Any excuse! We don't do the commercial thing - hand made stuff mainly. Like any couple in a good relationship, we do show each other every day that we love each other, but a day just to celebrate it overtly? I can't resist.

DizzyKipper · 15/02/2011 08:19

YANBU with your opinion, so long as you're not extending your opinion to slagging it off to the people which is does mean something to, then you would be. I'm of the same view as you, I prefer spontaneous gestures throughout the year rather than some dictated gesture on one particular day.

MummieHunnie · 15/02/2011 08:25

YANB, I think some people find the social pressure to conform and it can cause hurt in many different ways.

I will never forget the valentines just a few weeks before my exh left, he wrote me a beautiful expensive card with lots of gushing words he wrote about how happy I made him and how much he loved me, he left a few weeks later, after telling everyone else first, for another woman, apparently a few years later in court documents how he had never been happy with me and had never loved me Hmm and was professing undying love for ow.

AlexaMulberry · 15/02/2011 08:28

YANBU

Tacky, tacky, tacky.

ShowOfHands · 15/02/2011 09:56

fluffy, like I said we do that all year. DH buys books for me like other people buy flowers and chocolates. We go out on walks, make breakfast in bed, hold hands, have lovely meals together, cook for each other etc. He writes notes to me and leaves them on the pillow etc. And he does this all year round.

I have nowt against other people celebrating it but it's largely irrelevant to us.

StuffingGoldBrass · 15/02/2011 10:03

I have no problem with other people doing as they wish on the day as long as they don't inconvenience me (eg if I had wanted to go out for a meal with friends or with DS I would have not wanted to pay extra for special menus or be surrounded by heteromonogamous conformist mundanes either ostentatiously slobbering on each other or having a row.)

Chil1234 · 15/02/2011 10:05

People we're missing the whole point. This is not about love, romance or expression of devotion in barbie-pink, naff, Jackie Magazine style. Valentine's Day is a charity event when we show our largesse to the mass downtrodden workers of China and say a big licky 'thank you' by purchasing the acres of tat that they go blind painstakingly producing for our shelves..... surely?

So remember.... it's not for DH/DP/DW.... it's for the Chinese children....