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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not want to go to Cyprus?

35 replies

MrsPresley · 13/02/2011 20:38

My lovely inlaws are paying for my DP and our daughter to go to Cyprus for 2 weeks.

Usually MIL comes over here stays with us for a week, takes daughter back for 2 weeks, then brings her back and stays another week before going back, then they come back here and spend about 3 months (they have a caravan here).

I think due to their age (they're now in their early 70's) they're finding it a bit much coming back and forth, so this will be the last time daughter goes over, so they said they would pay for 1 of us to go and I think it should be DP, it would be good for him to spend some time with his parents.

Anyway, DP was off work sick for 3 days in January, he asked his boss if he could take it as holidays but his boss said he couldnt afford to pay him and now we're worried that he's not going to get paid the 2 weeks in April (boss has said he will get paid, but who know what will happen)

Anyway DP said it would be cheaper for me to take 2 weeks unpaid leave and TBH it probably wouldnt be a problem.

But I dont want to go!! I like my inlaws, but I dont like the heat and we've been to Cyprus 3 times before and it was too hot for me (even in April and October) plus (and please dont laugh).........

Inlaws have moved house and it's next to a farm that grows bananas and a couple of times MIL has said she has got up in the morning and found a snake in the house, apparently they're harmless (she chucks them out)but I would die if I saw one, it's the only thing I have a full blown phobia about, I just cant go.

DP and inlaws dont seem to understand my fear and DP says I'm selfish as we cant afford to lose 2 weeks wages, but I say we just make cuts elsewhere and as long as the rents paid we'll manage after all if he went off sick for 2 weeks or more we'd have to manage!

And if he does get paid, then no problem!

AIBU?

OP posts:
A1980 · 13/02/2011 20:48

No YANBU

I have real issues with heat too. I went on a red sea holiday last year. My firends thought I was made as I didn't enjoy it at all. It was meant to be in the low 30's but we arrived in the middle of a heat wave and it was 42c. Lizards in the bathroom, camels all over the roads eating rubbish, litter everywhere, salt water in the taps. I couldn't wait to get home.

I see how you feel eaxctly.

hardhatdonned · 13/02/2011 20:50

I just have issues with Cyprus in general so without reading the whole post i'd go with YANBU :o hth

AllGoodNamesGone · 13/02/2011 21:29

YANBU.

I love my in-laws but the thought of going and staying with them (or anyone for that matter) for two weeks in an unfamiliar country would bring me out in a cold sweat!

I am phobic of spiders so know how you feel regarding the snakes and a place in Cyprus near a banana farm would probably be a bit of a nightmare for me too!

Surely your DH is entitled to some holiday pay?

ChaoticAngelofAnarchy · 13/02/2011 21:32

YANBU

Snakes in the house ShockShockShock

AllGoodNamesGone · 13/02/2011 21:34

Also, could it be that your DH doesn't really fancy going himself and would rather like a fortnight on his xbox own at home?!

curlymama · 13/02/2011 21:35

YANBU. You don't even have to justify a reason not to go to another country for two weeks. If you don't want to go, you don't want to go. That's really all there is to it.

Deaddei · 13/02/2011 21:37

YADNBU.
Do not go.

Original poster
MrsPresley · 13/02/2011 21:37

Sorry just got back from walking the dog and getting daughter to bed.

Cyprus itself doesnt bother me I think it's lovely there but....

The heat

The probably slim chance of seeing a snake, I know she's only seen one twice since being in that house (about a year) but it's twice too much for me.

Feeling like I'm taking DP's time with his parents from him.

I really like my inlaws but dont know if I really want to spend 2 weeks with them

Also DP works away all week so my 17 year old son would left on his own, ok so he's capable, can cook and I trust him but what if something happened to him?

And I've been looking forward to some time with just son and me (well when he's not off out elsewhere)

No I just dont want to go Grin

OP posts:
susiedaisy · 13/02/2011 21:40

no YANBU your DP has just projected the problem onto you, its his parents he needs to sort it out, good luck

Original poster
MrsPresley · 13/02/2011 21:44

allgoodnamesgone My DP wouldnt even know how to switch an Xbox on never mind play one Grin

I dont know if he's "entitled" to holiday pay, it's just a small firm, 3 drivers (he's a long distance lorry driver) and a few weeks ago his boss was thinking of closing the company because of fuel prices, so ATM we're just grateful he has a job. But if his boss cant/wont pay there's not much we can do about it Sad

DP is looking for another job, but not much around just now Sad

OP posts:
claig · 13/02/2011 21:54

YANBU

AllGoodNamesGone · 13/02/2011 21:59

Ah, I see, it was seeming a bit mean (and I was wondering if the boss was being a bit unreasonable) that the poor bloke might not be getting any paid holiday but I see the problem.

And he wouldn't be getting a quiet fortnight of evenings at home if he's away driving for most of it, so that's not why he wants you to go!

Still, I think as long as he wouldn't actually lose his job if he takes some unpaid leave then your reasons for wanting it to be him who goes to Cyprus are perfectly valid.

MosEisley · 13/02/2011 22:03

YANBU. I went to Cyprus once. Never again. Hideous place.

Aren't you worried about your daughter with the snakes, though?!

MsKLo · 13/02/2011 22:07

hardhat

Am very curious as to what your issues are?!

hardhatdonned · 13/02/2011 22:08

Bad family holiday MsKLo, nothing more :) well that and the part we went to was just a giant unfinished concrete carpark i can't say as it was the best holiday I have ever experienced.

Personal experience as I say :)

stressheaderic · 13/02/2011 22:10

All those saying Cyprus = hideous, I'm shocked. It was without doubt one of the nicest holiday destinations I've ever visited. I thougt it very civilised and the locals super friendly.

hardhatdonned · 13/02/2011 22:11

Where abouts did you stay Stressheaderic?

woollyideas · 13/02/2011 22:14

April in Cyprus will not be that hot. Believe me. I used to live not a million miles from there. If you can bear to be in England in, say, June/early July, you can stand to be in Cyprus in April.
But that'not not really why you don't want to go, is it?!

Original poster
MrsPresley · 13/02/2011 22:16

MosEisley Not really, apparently they are quite small and harmless and MIL has only seen one twice so it's not a common thing but I'm so phobic I honestly think I would have have a heart attack if I saw one. I cant even look at pictures of them Sad

Anyway she'll have her big brave daddy with her Grin

OP posts:
grumpyhairbear · 13/02/2011 22:20

Hardhat
What a shame as there are some gorgeous places to stay in Cyprus - where did you stay?! Maybe you need some good recommendations! But don't write off the whole place because of your hol experience!

Me too am surprised at how many people saying they don't like
But I am biased being Greek-Cypriot an all! Grin

Original poster
MrsPresley · 13/02/2011 22:21

woollyideas I've been before in April and October and it was still too hot for me, It's fine at the beach but in the town was murder!

I really hate summer, I'm much better suited to a colder climate like Scotland and even then I try to stay indoors as much as possible when we get our 2 days of summer Grin.

The heats not the only reason, nor the main one, which I've already said.

OP posts:
hardhatdonned · 13/02/2011 22:22

We stayed in Polis but also did a tour of the island starting in Paphos up into the Troodos and Kyykos mountains to a little village near there and also were frequently in Latchi.

grumpyhairbear · 13/02/2011 22:26

Mrs Presley
If you don't want to go don't feel pressured!

Hardhat

What a shame you didn't enjoy - maybe paralimni/protaras would have been nicer for you

Where's your favourite hol destination? Don't say Turkey! Not to me anyhow! Grin

hardhatdonned · 13/02/2011 22:27

Ha ha ha so far its been New York :)

tigitigi · 13/02/2011 22:35

how old is your daughter could she fly on her own. Most airlines will look after kids pretty well, keep a stewardess with them from check in to their seat on the plane, keep an eye on them on the plane and take them through customs and deliver them to family at the other end. Its safe and I think they do it from 8 ish (I know people who have travelled alone from that age)

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