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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To think the Mormons aren't that bad?

64 replies

FreddyTeddy · 11/02/2011 21:54

I live in the same area as a Mormon church, a pretty big one and have been avoiding them since I moved here after hearing horror stories of them never leaving you alone.

Well, I ended up being asked if they could come for a chat, I didn't want to be rude so said they could, they came today.

They were here ages, we chatted about all sorts, they were polite and interesting and weren't pushy at all. I explained I have no interest in joining any religion, not just theirs, and that I am an atheist and they seemed fine with this, saying they are just happy to have people listen to them.

I thanked them for telling me about their religion, that I felt I knew more about them now but that there was no need to come again. So the big question is, are they going to come back?

I told my DH and he thinks they will camp out on the doorstep or something!! I thought I was just being polite and they weren't aggressively recruiting or anything. AIBU to think they were just happy to have someone listen or am I just a naive fool??

OP posts:

Bunbaker · 12/02/2011 09:13

When I first left home I shared a flat with a couple of Mormons. They were the lovliest, kindest people you could meet. We discussed their religion of course, but at no point were they evangelistic about it. One of my cousins is a Mormon, but it is a personal thing for her and again, she never pushes her beliefs on to anyone else.

I am old enough to be an original Osmond fan, and admit that was when I first heard about Mormons.

claig · 12/02/2011 09:45

I think your DH is right. I think they probably will come back. In the past, I have made the mistake of engaging with Jehovah's Witnesses at the door. I was then lucky enough to receive a number of visits over the years, which my neighbours seemed to avoid. My guess is that they note down addresses where people are open to discussion, and then revisit in the hope of gaining a convert. Best not to let them get a foot in, in my opinion.

MikeStand · 12/02/2011 09:55

Our previous neighbours were Mormons. They were very nice and never really mentioned their religion to us. I think they realised we were not up for conversion. However they did have 11 children over a 25 year span not sure if that's because they were mormons or just liked having children. All the boys did have a passing resemblance to the osmunds. I did make the hot drink faux par and offered her a coffee.

duchesse · 12/02/2011 10:03

My university friend used to drink Coke until we pointed out to him (rather cruelly- we were 18/19) that there was caffeine in it.

twolittlemonkeys · 12/02/2011 10:10

There isn't a norm in terms of political beliefs amongst Mormons, some are very Conservative, some extremely liberal. As for the number of children I know a couple of families like Mikestand mentions with lots of children, but on the whole most families I know at church have fewer children (we, for example are ttc#3 but will stop there!). My DH served a mission with Donny Osmond's nephew, Justin

thekidsmom · 12/02/2011 10:39

onimolap - I cant beleive you didnt get an immediate rush of 50 year old women rushing to reminise about the Osmonds...

I loved them (and still do!) I never saw them when I wa a teenaged but have seen Donny and or the brothers 5 times in the last few years.

If ever there was an advert for a religion, it has to be them. You couldnt meet a nicer, more grounded group of people.

KnittedBreast · 12/02/2011 10:42

I think it would be lovely if the islamic faith also offered to come to peoples homes to discuss their faith. this would mean that more people have personal experiences of muslims and may get rid of preconceptions

edam · 12/02/2011 11:08

The Mormons do a jolly good service for anyone tracing their family history. Something to do with baptising dead people so their souls can be saved, so they've built up a huge repository of death certificates (and possibly birth and marriage) in Salt Lake City or somewhere that you can check online. Afraid I forget the details.

Not too keen on JWs. Half dh's family are and they have some very dodgy opinions. Women are definitely supposed to be under their husband's rule - dh's cousin once asked him, in tones of horror 'why do you let your wife smoke'? Although tbh they did send us a lovely present when we got married, even though they turned down the invite on the grounds that they didn't feel able to attend our choice of service. (Bit of a result as it meant we got to invite more of our actual friends instead of rellies dh doesn't see from one year to the rest.)

Poor old MIL is still scarred by her parents converting to be JWs when she was a child - their lives, and so hers, were ruled by the ruddy church ordering them around. Made her parents move to Cornwall to start a new Kingdom Hall down there, even though they were both in ill-health and needed their then-adult children's help.

ThePosieParker · 12/02/2011 12:23

Knitted....Islam is far too prescriptive and doesn't take outside questions well at all.

zazizoma · 12/02/2011 13:16

I'm almost caught up on HBO's 'Big Love,' very entertaining and all about Mormonism and the polygamy thing.

Never met a Mormon myself who wasn't lovely, but the whole LDS thing is certainly not my cup of tea. To each his own, though my preference is that they not marry me into a Mormon family after I'm dead.

Bearskinwoolies · 12/02/2011 14:18

TLM The mormon church likes to state that polygamy ended in 1890, however the current mormon prophet of the time Wilford Woodruff had 10 living wives, and the church leader after him, Joseph F Smith had 5 living wives.

The Utah census 1840-1850 and all church records state that men outnumbered women in the church and in Utah. At the time church leaders NEVER taught that polygamy was because of a lack of men.

I know a hell of a lot of the proper history of the mormon church, which if you are interested, is available in your wards library.

Bearskinwoolies · 12/02/2011 14:20

Msklo I resigned my membership in the mormon church after studying the mormon church and its early history.

I am not willing to be a member of such an organisation.

Original poster

FreddyTeddy · 12/02/2011 14:50

Wow, a lot of posts since last night. I am hoping that as nice as they were, I won't have any more visits. Though my DH thinks they'll keep coming back every so often to see if they can make any headway with me.

I tried to make it clear that there is no chance of me becoming religious in anyway, I was just happy to talk and find out about them because they are badly thought of in the area and I didn't just want to follow the crowd and hate them on sight, if that makes sense.

They challenged me on why I wasn't religious, I said that there was a time I needed support from my faith but there was nothing there, no god, no anything. They didn't have any answer to that really.

The lads that came were just lovely, friendly young lads but I have to say that the mormon faith is a very special brand of crazy crazy. Mind you, I think most religions are pretty crazy.

I didn't think to ask about polygamy, I asked about homosexuality and they said they understood people had those feelings but to be part of the church they would be expected not to act on those feelings as it is the action that they believe is the sin. One of them has a gay cousin who is part of the church but abstains from sex.

OP posts:

Bearskinwoolies · 12/02/2011 15:42

Freddy You may have to be quite firm - they are selling you their religion and don't like to take no for an answer.

As for homosexuality, the mormon church in the states was very (and illegally) politically active in the Prop 8 debate in California. I have a good number of former mormon (homosexual and otherwise) friends who left the mormons because this and their treatment of homosexuals.

Unfortunately the young men who visited you will know very little about their church, and will parrot what they've been taught without thinking about it.

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