Ds is 14, and imo a great kid.
He's doing well at an ok comp, and is forecast 'A' in every subject he's taking. I've had teachers come to me to say how impressed with how well he works despite there being a lot of very disruptive kids in his class.
He plays for a football team, plays basketball for fun and is in the cadets. He has recently stopped going to badminton (not enjoying it) and athletics (has to wait a ridiculous amount of time in the cold to get the bus home). He does volunteer work with sn kids in the holidays.
When left to his own devices at home, he is prone to spend large amounts of time on the x-box. I have no problem with telling him to turn it off when it gets out of hand.
Dh seems to have got it into his head though that ds will grow up to be identical to the son next door who literally never leaves the house, plays games consoles continuously and generally just sponges off his mum. He's in his early twenties.
He says ds is immature because he makes fart jokes, leaves his stuff around, never reads apart from for school, and generally plays a bit too much x-box. Is this not quite normal for a 14yo? I don't quite get the jump from there to complete recluse. He forgets to hand in homework occasionally (maybe once a month, I know because they send emails)for which he knows the sanctions. For dh though this is a symptom of how extremely unmotivated he is and won't do anything with his life.
It's getting very tiring, because it's coming up more and more as dh is genuinely getting more and more concerned for his future, and I know he's only doing it because he cares, but i really feel like his view is massively unreasonable.
If it's relevant, dh is not ds's father.