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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To be angry about how long it took to be discharged from hospital yesterday?

84 replies

Kirisox · 05/02/2011 06:22

Gave birth to DS last Saturday afternoon via emcs and both he and I had further complications resulting in a stay in hospital. I was told by both of our doctors at 11am on Friday that they were happy for us to be discharged today, but I would just need to wait for my notes and prescription.
My poor, supportive, amazing DP and I were still waiting to leave with very few updates at 6 pm and eventually left at 7. I can honestly say today was the low point of what was otherwise a reasonable post natal care experience.
The main delay was caused by the labour ward failing to have written up my notes when I left there for the post natal care, and when this was done my attending midwife was unsure of how to use the relevant computer system to transfer the notes (or something like that...). This is the same labour ward who failed to recognise how much blood i lost during surgery which meant i needed a transfusion on Monday.
AIBU to think it's being unreasonable to wait this long for discharge paperwork?

OP posts:

CrapBag · 05/02/2011 19:26

This is normal I'm afraid. Not good enough, but it is normal.

I knew that I was going home at 9.30am the day I was discharged after I had DS. They finally let me go between 5 and 6 o clock. I had no visitors that day as I told people we were coming home. One time a MW came in to finally start the paperwork earlish afternoon, then left in a hurry saying "oh I have to go now, a woman is waiting to be discharged"

Then at 4 o clock they came in and said the computer systems were down and they had to do all the paperwork by hand so did I want to stay another night. Funnily enough, I didn't want to.

I'm having an ELCS on Monday and the MW at my pre op warned me that they day I am discharged, it may take a while. If they take too long I am going to tell them I am just walking out.

breatheslowly · 05/02/2011 20:41

I'd say the transfusion thing is normal. It happened to me and a friend. I think it is hard to judge how much blood has been lost when it is all over the floor. I found going into shock a strangely pleasurable experience.

BalloonSlayer · 05/02/2011 20:58

Where I had my last 2 DCs they won't discharge after nightfall, so they tend to try hard to get you out before tea time.

When I had DS2, DH suggested that whichever day I wanted to be discharged on, that I try to do it earlier in the day, ie arrive home in the afternoon, with time to settle down athome and get acclimatised. And he was right I think . . . and that was my third DC, so I wasn't particularly fazed at arriving home with a new baby.

I really do agree that it's a really bad idea to discharge a mother with a new baby late in the day.

JetLi · 05/02/2011 21:01

Similar happened to me. Said at 9:30am that I was being discharged. They cancelled all my meals & we started waiting...... and waiting, and waiting. At 8:30pm I got dressed & marched into the MW coffee room & told them I was going home. 10 minutes later the paperwork was done & we were out of there. It still rankles TBH. It'd been a really good experience up until that point.

JetLi · 05/02/2011 21:03

Oh & JB, you would probably be astonished to find that they don't actually deliver any babies on the postnatal ward. Funnily enough that happens in the delivery suite

jadziadax · 05/02/2011 21:20

Agree with pp saying just go.

As said earlier, a hospital is not a prison.

When I had DD I stayed in overnight, in the morning said I was leaving at 11 o'clock and if things weren't ready I would take DD to GP for checks and they could mail paperwork to me.
Said matter-of-factly, calmly, and with a smile.

DD was checked and paperwork ready to go for me at 10:45.

BTW, I'm a nurse, so I well know that things can get busy, and also that, like in any job, some staff are lazy faffers.

JetLi · 05/02/2011 21:27

Thats a great tip jadziadax - I'll remember that DC2 is due imminently

porcamiseria · 05/02/2011 21:27

congrats

but YABU to be pissed off, its a stretched NHS my love! emergencies and all that! Not the Portland!

JaquesTouatte · 05/02/2011 22:22

jadziadax wrote"... said I was leaving at 11 o'clock and if things weren't ready I would take DD to GP for checks and they could mail paperwork to me.
Said matter-of-factly, calmly, and with a smile."

That's what I meant by "not flouncing out" jadziadax put it much better.

igetmorelovefromthecat · 05/02/2011 22:37

I had dd2 in July, bit of a horror story with no midwife there until 12 mins before she was born so no pain relief at all. I just wanted to go as soon as she was born so they didn't even put me on the ward, but I still had to sit around for 5 hours while they did their paperwork.

Quite enjoyed the precious time with my baby though, it was a lovely summers evening and my doula stayed with us until we left, we sat chatting and taking it in turns to hold dd.

I was knackered and wanted to go home to my bed though! Pleased when they let us go. did contemplate just leaving, I guess there's not much they could do if you did that.

Louii · 05/02/2011 22:43

I just told them I was leaving at lunchtime and just left.

jadziadax · 05/02/2011 23:51

Hope everything goes smoothly for you JetLi

Morloth · 06/02/2011 07:16

It is annoying but probably unavoidable, staff are stretched and there are far more important things for them to be doing.

Like Louii I let them know I would be leaving at lunch time (well after lunch actually never pass up a free meal!). Then did so.

They did sort it out for me, but if they hadn't I would still have picked up DS2 and just left. We were both fine, no reason for us to be there anymore.

pippitysqueakity · 06/02/2011 07:49

1st DD, EMCS, told at 8.00am would be discharged v soon...12 hours later... 2nd DD EMCS told would be discharged that day, thought 'oh yeh' still in pj's 10 mins later, told to go! Luck of the draw I think. Was discharged with no pain relief tho' just thought cash strapped NHS didn't do it any more (baby brain) till MW came and despatched DH back to hospital for pills PDQ!

pippitysqueakity · 06/02/2011 07:51

P.S. EMCS means emergency, not elective, right? Not that makes much difference in scheme of things.

manchestermummy · 06/02/2011 11:11

YANBU to be annoyed but I think that's the way it happens.

When I was 28 weeks pg I stayed a night in hospital. They kept we waiting all day for a scan until at 5 I realised it wasn't happening. They told me I couldn't leave until I'd seen a doctor: the doctor wouldn't see me until I'd had a scan and the nurse told me I could be waiting a few days for one. I walked out. I'd had no sleep which was making my morning sickness bad, DD1 was at home and DH was struggling. Good job as I found out the following day that they had never intended to do a scan at all!

BoffinMum · 06/02/2011 11:22

TBH I don't know why people don't just walk out if they want to leave. It's not a prison. I have done this on a number of occasions. Paperwork/meds can always follow.

PenguinInStilettos · 06/02/2011 11:31

With ds I was kept waiting for ages for paperwork.

I know hospital wards are not the greatest but with hindsight I wish, o God I wish I'd just taken the opportunity to sleep!

BrandyAlexander · 06/02/2011 11:43

Hi BoffinMum, it's a good point but in my case I think I didn't walk out because as a new mum and feeling quite vulnerable and unsure of myself, I wasn't quite sure what to do. I am pregnant again and it's funny how much more vocal and "myself" I have been this time around in order to ensure that the crap care I got all the way through the pregnancy and post birth doesn't happen again. I would definitely walk out next time.

BoffinMum · 06/02/2011 11:58

Well, I am a stroppy cow and when this was tried on after I had my first at 19, I thought to myself:

This place is filthy.
I get more tlc at home
Ergo no point at all in staying in

And then booked a taxi. They were a bit surprised but had to go along with it and the GP popped round later to check on me. Everything was fine.

BrandyAlexander · 06/02/2011 12:02

I can be a stroppy cow too, as I said I am much more myself this time round. . I do look back and think "who was that person". I actually find it very reassuring to have heard so many people (including the nurse) saying they walked out, or just tell them politely when you're going to walk out. I won't feel like I am being unreasonable if/when I do it myself.

Onetoomanycornettos · 06/02/2011 12:09

The crazy thing is they need the beds, and there's this constant block in the system in getting people discharged (I've had it after giving birth, after operations, in A & E). There's a real problem with people not flowing through, everything is chaotic, not enough staff etc. I'm not sure it's a priority, tbh, perhaps not the subject of a target, I have the feeling that if it was the subject of a target, everyone would pay that attention.

I don't say this to criticise the staff, they are so busy and stressed by the chaos, but the systems in place are really poor and those waiting for discharge are pretty much forgotten about til they start fussing or just go.

KayM · 06/02/2011 12:11

YABU - midwives do not have one lady / baby to look after, your midwife may also haev been delivering a stillborn, twins or who knows what? Be grateful you & your baby were able to be discharged.

eviscerateyourmemory · 06/02/2011 12:12

Midwives on the postnatal ward are not delivering babies.

WhyMeWhyNot · 06/02/2011 12:37

eviscerateyourmemory Sadly our postnatal ward routinely has ante natal patients due to lack of beds, babies are indeed born there sometimes, not ideal but better than a trolley somewhere in a corridor.

Paperwork is a legal condition, drugs administered to take out need checking by 2 members of staff,hence the apparent slowness of it all, roll on the days when the system can go paperless, and Mum's can just be given a prescription to take to their local chemist on the way home for their meds.

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