to think that school gate politics is worse than school playground politics

[rickymummy]

I am a 39 years old woman, and was pleased to have left playground politics behind many many years ago.

Now I find myself in a postion where one of the mums at school is "not talking" to me. No idea why, can't think of any reason why it started and, when I approached her and asked why, she just said she didn't want to talk about it.

As far as I am aware, there are three other mums she is also "not talking" to.

I am, of course, rising above it, and trying my hardest not avoid gossip etc, but I see her every day; she comes and talks to whoever I am chatting to but blanks me. Pulls her child away if our children try and walk together....

I know it's her and it shouldn't get to me, but I just needed an rant.

How weird, I've only been doing the school run for 2 weeks and have made a resolution to smile and say hello to people I don't know, after 37 years of being too terrified to approach people because i assume they won't like me and probably missing out on lots of friends as a result . I am my own worst enemy.

YANBU, she sounds paranoid and a it nasty and attention seeking with a very small life. I never "don't speak" though...I can't handle it. If people piss me off i stay out of their way or am superficially polite!

Hi OP same thing happened to me a few years ago, it was really unpleasant and nasty. Then thankfully the crazy lady moved her kids to a new school and I no longer had to encounter her. I wonder if it was your school she went to, she pulled this shit with loads of people. I feel for you

I don't talk to a woman who had a massive rant at me and my dc in the playground for a trivial playground incident. Have you ranted at anybody recently? I also avoid the jellyfish woman (think Bridget Jones). Comes up all cheery and makes some competitive snubby comment - leaving you aghast and reeling. Or the woman who over praises her dc in a very loud voice. Or the woman who tells everyone in town you look so bad because your mother's just died. If you don't do any of these things it's her. Otherwise it's you.

Not guilty of any Of any of those! Try to be friendly to everybody!

In that case yanbu.

Had a mother at my DS school say to me, "I haven't seen you this term have I chickydoo, your DS must be in the other class, that's good as I won't have to speak to you anymore"
Jaw dropped open, hardly spoke to her anyway she has a DD,and our kids never mixed. Spoke to her once at a parents get together, we were never going to be each others cup of tea....but to be so rude....I hate the playground, wish my DS could go elsewhere.....probably be the same though.

Should be in the MN Advice to Parents of FirstBorns: Avoid School Gates Always.

yanbu, I hate school gates politics too - but ignore, ignore, ignore! I wouldn't have even asked her why she wasn't talking to me tbh - playing right into her hands.

I'm friendly to all, have a few good friends but refuse to join cliques/squabbles and gossips. As a result I'm always the last to know everything but there you go. The PTA at our school is an absolute bitchfest

Thank you all!!!
I will be strong and keep smilling!!!

I was an older Mother with DD2 and all the playground pettiness just washed over me. It only lasts a few years and then you hardly see other parents when your child goes to secondary school.

I think when I started a conversation with someone elseI'd casually mention that this is happening.
"You know, XXX is mad with me, don't know why. But whenever I'm talking to someone at the gate she has to come over and talk to them and make a point of ignoring me."
Of course that might be the one time she doesn't come over.