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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

.... in telling friends and family not to kiss DD on her cheeks?

34 replies

BennyMoore · 30/01/2011 11:16

DD is nearly 7 months and has eczema on her cheeks. Recently I started telling then to stop kissing and squeezing her cheeks as it will make the eczema worse. They are not happy with this and often gives me funny looks.

OP posts:
rubyslippers · 30/01/2011 11:17

Does kissing make it worse?

Squeezing I can kind of get but a peck on the cheek ...

bubblewrapped · 30/01/2011 11:19

are they all slobbery kissers?

I dont think a peck on the cheek will make her eczema worse at all.

purepurple · 30/01/2011 11:19

Just tell them it's impetigo. That'll stop them Grin

Bonsoir · 30/01/2011 11:20

You need to keep bacteria away from eczema - so yes, the OP is completely right, people shouldn't be kissing and touching her DD.

HecateQueenOfWitches · 30/01/2011 11:21

I can see how pinching and squeezing the skin could irritate, but kissing also irritates the skin? You have observed a clear and direct link between a kiss on the cheek and an eczema flare up? What happens to her cheek after a kiss?

fair enough. if it does, it does. tell them that. You have seen that after a kiss, x, y, z happens and it is quite painful for her. If they carry on after that, then they are being selfish.

Or put thick cream on her cheeks - they probably won't want to kiss them then Grin

Cyb · 30/01/2011 11:22

How often is your child getting kissed and pinched?

Hk13 · 30/01/2011 11:26

my sister had a similar problem, esp with the mil who wears LOTS of makeup and strong perfume, each time she visited the eczema got worse so she asked her not to kiss the baby. Predictably mil got huffy about it but my sister stood her ground and basically told her to 'deal with it'! Smile

PepperMoonchild · 30/01/2011 11:27

You've told them so they should respect that. DS has multiple intolerances and allergies, people are always offering him food he can't have (which is a lot of food) and when I say no and explain why they give me these looks as well, like I've invented a cows milk allergy just to hurt their feelings Hmm

Original poster
BennyMoore · 30/01/2011 11:55

The reason why I think that their actions will worsen the eczema is that the skin on her cheeks are broken which can get infected through contact. Its for their own and DD interest. My family does not listen to me.

OP posts:
HecateQueenOfWitches · 30/01/2011 11:57

Thick white cream on both cheeks.

If they want to kiss her through that, I'll eat my hat.

But yes, they should be listening to you. It is unacceptable that they are not.

GwendolineMaryLacey · 30/01/2011 12:05

Damn. I hate threads like this. I come on all ready to say you're being utterly ridiculous. Then I read the op and go oh...er...no YANBU. :o

Bonsoir · 30/01/2011 12:05

This non-prescription cream does wonders for my DD's eczema - soothes and heals very fast, and isn't visible to the naked eye.

StuffingGoldBrass · 30/01/2011 12:09

You are right OP. The human mouth is actually amazingly dirty and full of bacteria, and it's not at all a good idea to kiss broken skin. Just keep saying 'Please don't kiss her face, it makes her eczema worse'.

mamas12 · 30/01/2011 12:09

hmm what a trial having to fend off the rellies who just won't listen.

Ask them if they want to harm or hurt your dd and wait for an answer for that is what they are doing.
Otherwise get a bib or a t shirt printed with a simple message along the lines of
Please do not kiss me as it will make my cheeks worse.
Give them all a hand out printed out with their own name on it each.

breatheslowly · 30/01/2011 13:33

Watch out for people with cold sores kissing your DD's eczema as that is a possible route for infection and can have a very bad effect.

kaid100 · 30/01/2011 14:02

Since there is a genuine medical reason for this, YANBU.

Original poster
BennyMoore · 30/01/2011 14:21

Bonsoir, do you know if the Cicabion Creme can be used on babies. My experience wit non prescription cream is that they are too hash on babies skin especially on the face. The onces that I have tried, leaves the area looking try and dark. Its very distressing and it would not bother me so much if the eczema was on other part of her body and not on her face.

OP posts:
aimingforthesky · 30/01/2011 14:41

You could suggest a kiss to top of the head- but I think the issue is getting friends and relatives to take your concerns seriously.

breatheslowly- my DD1 caught cold sore virus from my mum- she was mortified and had not realised how infectious it is.

fairybubbles · 30/01/2011 14:44

YANBU- I had to do this at one point too, my DS had terrible skin as a baby and any sort of contact, if his skin was already inflamed, would make it sore. It would annoy me especially when people wearing strong perfume/aftershafe would try to cuddle up to him, he made his skin so red.

I once told off inlaws for using perfumed baby wipes on his face, and i made sure when he started nursery they knew not to do this either.

FFIW other than a few occasional flare-ups DS has almost outgrown, though we still have to be carefull.

Bonsoir · 30/01/2011 17:48

BennyMoore - my DD is 6 and has ultra-fine, super sensitive skin. She cannot use many off-the-shelf creams with any strength at all (she yells in pain), but has found the Cicabio incredibly good - she is actually keen to use it as it is so soothing, but it really does heal as well as soothe. I wouldn't hesitate to try it on a baby's skin.

Rhadegunde · 30/01/2011 17:54

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Bonsoir · 30/01/2011 18:02

BennyMoore - you can try this body wash if your DD is prone to eczema - great stuff. The whole ABCDerm baby range is great.

WimpleOfTheBallet · 30/01/2011 18:29

When they next go to do it, pinch their cheeks firmly before they get to her. I would. Poor baby. She doesn't need idiots making her cheeks more sore!

If they complain tell them "I warned you not to...she's not putting up with that...you're making her cheeks more sensitive!"

unfitmother · 30/01/2011 18:40

YANBU

2rebecca · 30/01/2011 20:25

Is the cheek pinching a local thing? Has never occurred to me to pinch anyone on the cheek.
I recall seeing someone on TV pinching a kid's face and going "coochy coochy coo" but have never seen a real person do it.
Agree ask them to kiss her hand or top of head instead, or just give her a hug.