To wonder if my idea of foreplay is too much?

[NeedsAGoodSeeingTo]

Test!

OOOOOO

If it's as short as that then you will not be dissapointed

Disclaimer:
Ok...I have name changed and am not a pervert...cubed poo, pirate sex voices,funny/toddler food at dinner parties=Pombears.

DH and I have a not bad sex life..both in our late 30s...he USED to be much better with foreplay and now I think he can't be bothered.

He's loving and nice usually..but to get turned on I need to be stroked for a while...I don't mind the odd quickie at all...sometimes they're great....but for a proper session I need to be relaxed...and that involves stroking me anyhwere BUT my fanjo or boobs...if I'm a bit tense to begin with I get all jumpy when he goes in for the kill and grabs me on the money.

Just had a mini row because I'm too demanding in that I want stroking...it's not ALL the time ffs!

I understand he's tired whatever..but I don't want to get battered by his bloody battering ram tacticts when I am tired too!

So AIBU and do other women need what I need?

If it is the same as mine then possibly:

Dh cleans house from top to bottom while I read magazine in bath and eat a flake. Then I do my feet, nails blow dry hair, moisturise from top to bottom and watch tv on the bed while he gets showered.

Now that's foreplay!

No you are not being unreasonable if you reciprocate his enjoyment in return.

Sounds like you enjoy the teasing. Can you do some of this yourself too? Buy an electric massager for instance and get yourself going.

Quickies aside, I don't really consider it foreplay unless I have at least one (preferably 2) orgasams prior to doing the actual deed.

Or maybe I'm just a selfish demanding bitch?

Disclaimer to above post - its been that bloody long now though I'd probably just be grateful for anything I got.

Sometimes I think DH's idea of foreplay is sticking a finger in to see if I am wet enough

We've got a bloody bag full of "massagers and toys" maggots...we're quite adventurous...I think it's crap that I have to do it my bloody self! I go dwn on him all the time...which I like and does he...but I dont like oral sex on me...so why can't I choose another option!

Oh crisp!

That is where I differ gaff, I like the build up but my orgasms are overwhelming. I have on occasion fainted, burst into tears or just rolled over in exhaustion. My hubby knows that once we are at this point it's a done deal so it ends up as a race to the finish post

Strangely I also get a craving sometimes for a cup of hot, sweet tea. dh always appreciates my demanding that he "wash himself up, and get the kettle on"

Faff not gaff bloody predictive text sorry!

you don't get to come in till you've knocked on the door.

maggots I'm the same...I NEED a long build up or the sex is crap...I dont want sex much unless it's going to result in an orgasm...I don't like it and it bloody hurts!

Then you are NBU so stop sucking him off if he gets whingy.

Can't you lie on your side propped up on pillows and give him head (he can kneel by your face) while he strokes your back and bum cheeks?

YANBU - stroking or back kissing is a prerequisite or he doesn't get it. He moans but then I don't always get / reach an orgasm - but I still enjoy it.

But he LITERALLY knocks on it PenelopeT!

Bang, bang, bang!

I might get a bell fitted then at least there'd be a vibration!

Maggots...he will sometimes do that but often he expects to lie like the king on his back!

He could use a feather or a big blusher brush, that is lovely!

Why not suggest getting in a Male Swedish 6 ft blonde masseur to get you going before the sex. I'm sure he'll change his viewpoint.

No, I don't think YABU at all! Most women aren't turned on by going straight for the boobs or fanjo Of course he needs to pay attention to other areas first. Is he perhaps turned on as soon as he has a sexy thought, and that's why he expects you to be too?

I do the jumpy thing too and I think it stems from exes being too over eager and jumping in when I wasn't ready.

He thinks you're "demanding" because you want some touching elsewhere than your genitals?

I orgasm quie easly cereal...IF I have been properly "prepared".

No YANBU- quickies are lovely but for me, they're all about me taking pleasure from his pleasure....

But for me to get off, I need foreplay.

And I so agree- if you caress my back and kiss me for a while, then my nipples become supercharged little spark plugs of desire- connected to my nethers by an invisible twanging elastic band.

Go in for the grab, and my nipples become ...well let's not even bother with what my nips become- I become a super-sensitive vaginally- dried up ball of tense-ity.

when he is sat watching telly, flacid. go sit on his lap and gyrate all over him.

just as he gets a hard on fake an orgasm(or have one)

When he tries it on say no sorry im done now.

Do this again a few days later.

When he moans you can point out that it is the same as him having sex without you

Wait... you don't like sex, and it hurts? He's doing something wrong here. It sounds like he's doing it way before you're ready. It shouldn't hurt, at all.

I like the idea of the big Swesh Maseur Maggots! I really wish I could do that...t'would be worthit for the shock factor!

Bertie it IS memories of clumsy exes!