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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be annoyed when "vegetarians" eat fish?

293 replies

purpleandpink · 28/01/2011 12:29

It cannot just be me who finds this irritating?

Someone who eats no meat, but does eat fish is a pescetarian. As a fully fledged vegetarian it bugs the HELL out of me when people say "I'm a veggie, but I eat fish" Or even worse "but I eat fish AND CHICKEN".....Angry

The problem is there are now so many of these "fish eating vegetarians" that people seem to assume all veggies eat fish, and when I eat out and ask what veggie choices there are, I get offered fish and the "true" veggie options are limited to perhaps 1 or 2 dishes.

I have no problem with people eating just fish but PLEASE do not call yourself a veggie when you clearly aren't one! I don't know why people do it, whether they think it's trendy or they are just lazy or confused about what they are.

I know this is a BIG rant but it really really annoys me. If I am a veggie and someone ask me "do you eat fish?" I practically rip their heads off (which I know is unreasonable but there you go Wink )

But AIBU to ask that people only call themselves vegetarians if they actually are one???

OP posts:
cerealqueen · 29/01/2011 00:18

Randomana, do you do that? Eat what you can kill yourself? I've had this discussion before with vegetarians - is it about yes you do it, fish it kill it gut it etc, or that you think you would or could but don't?

Lizzabadger · 29/01/2011 00:40

Yanbu. I went on a vegetarian cookery course where they cooked with fish! When I protested they announced "Oh Lizza's a STRICT vegetarian". Grr... Mind you, I get annoyed when I see "vegetarians" eating Haribo...

CakeandRoses · 29/01/2011 00:46

yanbu

i think it annoys me more just cos i'm greedy competitive around food though Smile

Several times I've been at weddings, conferences or whatever and just as i think i'm all safely entitled to 'hog' all the lovely veggie option (as i'm the one who has made an ethical choice to reduce animal suffering, save the planet, blah, blah) - and then over walks another 'vegetarian' smoked salmon in one hand and then with the other plucks a choice morsel from my veggie platter. Angry Grin

CakeandRoses · 29/01/2011 00:47

lizza that's incredible! Shock who were the organisation running the course?

Lizzabadger · 29/01/2011 07:18

Camden council adult ed. Japanese "vegetarian" cookery circa 1998. Name and shame. Hopefully they are a bit more enlightened now.

EmmaBemma · 29/01/2011 07:18

I used to be a vegetarian, but now I eat fish. If I'm being served the vegetarian or fish-based option at a dinner I often get people triumphantly saying "oho! how can you call yourself a vegetarian when you eat fish?"; when I say "I don't", it takes the wind right out of their pompous sails.

Lamorna · 29/01/2011 08:10

' I recently had to cater for a vegetarian for a whole weekend. Sorry no tomatoes, sorry no olives, sorry no peppers. Oh sorry, did I not mention,, not that keen on eggs.'

That person might as well give up saying they are anything and just say 'I am a fussy eater'. I am quite happy to cater for vegetarians,I have many meat/fish free meals, I just don't expect to be further restricted on vegetables, pulses, nuts etc it destroys the whole joy of cooking!

'Do you get annoyed by meat-eaters that don't like every kind of meat?'

Not annoyed but irritated. I can't stand picky eaters! I can cope with people having a few things that they ask you to avoid but not if it makes cooking a simple meal a mine field of problems!!

Actually I don't mind that much as long as they are honest from the beginning and don't put labels on it but just say 'sorry, I am a very fussy eater and have a restricted diet-here is a list of things that I don't eat', rather than say 'I am a vegan' and then drip feed you the fact they don't eat cabbage, tomatoes, chick peas etc

TyraG · 29/01/2011 08:14

Yeah it makes me nuts when people say that. I'm not a vegetarian or vegan but I think it's kind of a slap in the face of vegetarians everywhere as it's making a mockery of their chosen lifestyle.

cory · 29/01/2011 09:44

I think there are perfectly valid reasons for being a pescetarian. My SIL finds meat disagrees with her. Others may be troubled by conditions of intensive farming. And it is just as possible for a carnivore to be a fussy eater.

cherrysodalover · 29/01/2011 10:07

YABU

It is just shorthand often to avoid a big boring conversation about what and why you may eat fish.

Many countries/people have no idea what the term pescatarian means so saying you are veggie is simpler- i often do and i eat certain fish.

I had 2 PE teachers lay into me over this once- they were unrelenting. Very tedious and I really wondered what character flaw caused such inquistion.

It is none of your business how people identify themselves- how many 'socialists' do you know who...well scratch the surface of their lives and you begin to wonder how their principles are reflected in their lives....or some religious people.

The fact you are irked by it says a lot about where you put your energies frankly.

Are there not real issues to be irked by in this life.

But hec you must be a pedant and possibly a certain personality that just fixates on things like this.

You want to watch that because I once had a boss like that and she was a nightmare to co exist by.

Life is too short- give up the bone little pup.THERE IS NO MEAT ON IT.;)

cherrysodalover · 29/01/2011 10:20

just noticed there are some real vegetarian haters on this thread.

There is an argument out there that claims within 100 years everyone will have become vegetarian and that it is currently an indicator of a sign of higher intelligence.

Some of the comments on here are quite boorish but gives me an insight into some of the awkward gits over the years I have had to encounter- like the ones who almost go out of their way to serve a total meat based meal, knowing you are veggie.

My ( in other ways) lovely sil does this and I now ask to go and cook my own sauce or turn up with frozen veggie burgers to ensure some source of protein over the stay, when I visit annually) when she offers me a bowl of naked spagetti with" I thought we could grate some carrot on it". Mmmm thanks for the effort- that will be great for my milk supply for my 5 month baby.I have to say that that irked me- it is a lack of effort and we usually make an effort for people we care about.

Clearly some people just have a problem with people making different choices to them, especially when there is a claimed ethical basis.

Hec when i have guests who eat meat, i cook some kind of meat option.

Hey look now I have taken up a different bone- I just can't bear petty peeps and pedants who bully people about their choices.

brightlightsandpromise · 29/01/2011 10:36

i dont eat meat, but i eat fish and chicken and the occasional sausage. I used to not eat meat and only eat fish, i didnt call myself anything other than my name. I think that it is possibly more useful from an animal welfare point of view to insist on meat that has been raised happy and healthy and treated with respect. I have the occasional free rage organic chicken and have discovered some outdoor reared, free range organic pork sausages. This sort of meat is expensive so we only eat once or twice a week.

bamboostalks · 29/01/2011 10:48

"I don't eat meat but I eat chicken and sausages." That has given me the best laugh of the day.

BuzzLightBeer · 29/01/2011 10:49

yes people can call themselves what they want, s'only words innit?
So you can tell me you're a vegetarian while eating your cod and chips, I can tell you you're a twat, for example.

LadyOfTheManor · 29/01/2011 10:50

My sister is a vegetarian. Who eats sausages and chicken.

How bizarre.

BuzzLightBeer · 29/01/2011 10:54

brightlights of course you eat meat, chicken is not a vegetable.

vagolaJahooli · 29/01/2011 10:56

Cherry very true. Over the years I've been baffled as to why my mentioning I'm vegetarian seems to be a battle sign. I get it from meat eaters and vegans. My DH finally worked out what you describe a few years back (he is veg too and gets grief for it). He worked out that by choosing one way to live your life you are implying to the other person that the way they have chosen is wrong.

Now to the point of this thread. I do find the whole vegetarian but I eat fish thing annoying. I once met a girl who described herself as a 'selective vegetarian' because she ate fish and chicken. However, what I find more annoying is the implication that because I am vegetarian and want to start a fight.

brightlightsandpromise · 29/01/2011 11:00

i know buzz, i was just making a point - we have only just started eating chicken again however so we are now just bog standard carnivores who are a bit choosy where our meat comes from. When i was only eating fish, i just used to say i dont eat meat - but OTHER PEOPLE used to call me a vegetarian! not me

whatagradeA · 29/01/2011 11:01

DH and I (neither of us are veggie) had this conversation the other day. I said that vegetarians don't eat fish. He insisted that they do because he's known loads of vegetarians who eat fish Why can't people just say 'I don't eat meat'?

BuzzLightBeer · 29/01/2011 11:04

I see.

nobody really needs the label these days do they? You go somewhere, you pick what you want to eat. Its the ones who want to shout loudly about being a vegetarian and then eat fish (or sausages!) that piss people off. I don't care what anyone chooses to eat, but I care about people who think words can be used to suit themselves. Words have meaning so we can all understand each other, and "vegetarian" means you do not eat any meat or fish. You can't just change the meanings of words because you feel like it.

madhairday · 29/01/2011 11:27

YANBU

I was at a hotel last week and got offered fish when I said I was veggie Angry

I'm not ranting and raving about it but do get annoyed, because it does seem to limit the menu options for real veggies, and to be frank they're already limited enough.

mutznutz · 29/01/2011 11:41

I still do what I can to minimise the dairy I eat/drink and make sure my milk and eggs come from an ethical a source as I can

Annie what is an ethical source?

mobilis · 29/01/2011 12:00

For those who find it difficult to explain what a pescetarian is - surely only an imbecile or a pedant would misunderstand if you said "I only eat fish" without having to identify yourself as any kind of "arian"?

hoovercraft · 29/01/2011 12:02

I cringe inside when I get vegetarian clients

GabbyLoggon · 29/01/2011 12:29

I still eat some meats but not others: Like, say, Lamb and Rabbit. Fish is ok for me.
But they were talking about eating bambi on tv last night. Dont fancy venision and kangeroo jumps off the plate. cheers "Gabby"