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Original poster

... to hate the phrase "I've worked hard all my life..."

77 replies

woollyideas · 27/01/2011 23:05

Why do people say it? I don't like it and think people who say it should have an immediate custodial sentence.

I mean, what IS their point? Confused

OP posts:
OTheHugeManatee · 28/01/2011 10:13

Some people don't do a job, but look after elderly or disabled relatives etc. Of course I don't judge that.

But I know at least one person who doesn't work, but is independently wealthy and just swans around being neurotic and a bit useless. And I at least one person who doesn't work for a living nor is caring for anyone vulnerable, and has everything paid for by the state. In both cases, I reserve the right to be a bit judgy. So shoot me.

potplant · 28/01/2011 10:15

My dad says this a lot, usually followed by a rant about the NHS and single mothers and plasma TVs.

I think a lot of people like my Dad who were around in the early days of the NHS were sold the idea that we all contribute and we all benefit. He finds it a little unfair that he has 'worked hard all his life' and still has to wait for treatment when there's a single mother/illegal immigrant living in a 15 bedroom mansion with a plasma TV on every wall (guess what his daily paper of choice is?)

I like to remind him that if you only take out what you pay in then my sister wouldn't be entitled to the 15 years of mental health care she has received or that his 55 YO downs brother should be chucked out of the state funded care home he lives in.

IntergalacticHussy · 28/01/2011 10:20

of course there will always be individuals who work the system (Philip Green, anyone?), but i do think the number of cases is exaggerated out of all proportion by the newspaper you mention and others, in order to blame the poor rather than the economic system which prefers to put people out of work in the name of profit.

ISNT · 28/01/2011 10:21

This phrase (when used in reference to what people have got) also reinforces the idea that only paid work is worth anything ie looking after children, housework, caring for relatives, all of that stuff isn't "hard work".

Starbear · 28/01/2011 10:44

BluddyMoFo That's why the phrase 'Live for the moment' is sometimes worth using. It has stuck in my mind many years ago that a colleague died 7 DAYS! after retiring Shock
My DH really works too hard and even on holiday can't relax. I now have a theme song for him 'Slow down you move to fast, you've got to let the morning last, kicking stones.... etc.
I do judge people who don't contribute to the common good e.g not look after their children and family, not have paid work with no good reason not to,not do volunteer work.
I also judge the wealth that moan about the poor then don't pay their taxes or fair wages to their staff. Must get on with some housework now Blush

Starbear · 28/01/2011 10:45

Sorry for grammer & spelling mistakes Blush

LifeInTheSlowLane · 28/01/2011 10:52

BluddyMoFo- my parents are in a similar situation, they worked really hard all their lives, had their own business. Finally retired and my mum got early-onset dementia, followed by my dad getting cancer. Instead of having a golden retirement swanning about spending all their hard-earned money, most of it went on my mum's care which isn't covered by the NHS (luckily my dad's care was, and he's recovered now). My dad is now on his own and is determined to spend what little is left having a good time!

KalokiMallow · 28/01/2011 10:57

It does seem to be used mainly as a stick to beat others with.

There are exceptions as Bluddy has mentioned, but most people who say it do tend to end it with mention of what others are perceived to be not doing.

KnittedBreast · 28/01/2011 10:59

this phrase is usually followed by some mumbelings about foreigners and the state of this country, then about the war etc...

KalokiMallow · 28/01/2011 10:59

ISNT Exactly. For example, I think I can safely say "I have worked hard all my life", it's just that for the last few years that hard work has been physio and trying to work out how to live on very little money. But somehow I don't think that's quite what the phrase is usually meant to be about.. Hmm

bikermoll · 28/01/2011 11:14

Right up there with " I fought in the war you know " in annoyingness!

hobbgoblin · 28/01/2011 11:28

Aww blimey, these tales of people becoming ill and unable to enjoy their retirement are very sad. What's that movie where the old man's wife dies and they (him and boy) tie a balloon to the house and go on an adventure or similar? I cried at that and it is an aniamtion fgs!

Bluddy, would/could the elderly man go on his own if his wife was cared for?

southeastastra · 28/01/2011 11:29

blimey some of your are sour

KalokiMallow · 28/01/2011 12:14

Hobb Do you mean Up? Is it good?

BluddyMoFo · 28/01/2011 12:21

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

duchesse · 28/01/2011 12:38

I personally know very few people who have "worked hard all their life". What most people do is work. They still have time to relax, do the things they want to do, see friends, tinker with things in the house, travel.

To my mind, "working hard" means you don't have time to do these things- ie working 14+ hour days. You couldn't sustain that level of work long-term. The people I know who have worked hard at times certainly do not not- doctor friends who as junior registrars did 110 hour weeks, teachers and city workers and lawyers doing 70-90 hour weeks, people setting up their own empires businesses doing up to or more 20 hours a day. All these people worked hard doing these things.

To my mind, doing 8 hour days for 40 years (unless you're down a coal mine or on a trawler) is not "working hard" in the sense of being able to feel smuggy smug about it. It's just a job. It doesn't make you special. imo Some jobs are more special than others but that's another issue.

Starbear · 28/01/2011 13:19

BluddyMoFo That's what I plan to do in my old age, write letters to The Times, have a good old moan about young people, take a flask and biscuits to MP's surgeries and take him/her to task. I might take up 'causes' and fight for the rights of others. Oh! I quite fancy a good demo too. Due to my job I can't get involved in poltical Demo's so I'm looking forward to it. If I pop up clogs while doing it so much the better. I have also discussed with my sister that we are going hill walking on days, where local pubs do discount for pensioners, have my hair done on Tuesdays at discount in pink or blue. I also want to cycle with my basket at the front, very slowly around town. Smile The when I get knocked off I probably will get to the front of the NHS queue

Wordsonascreen · 28/01/2011 13:29

Bikermoll

Yeah those war veterans.. what a bunch of moaning bastards eh?

FFS

hobbgoblin · 28/01/2011 14:38

Kaloki, yes! That's it, Up. Is a wonderful thing and I hate the animated genre as a rule. I really recommend.

Bluddy, that is a real shame. :(

I'd be moany if I had those health problems. I'm quite moany now.

monkeyflippers · 28/01/2011 14:55

Ah BluddyMoFo - just read you post on page one . . . so sad!

clevercloggs · 28/01/2011 15:01

I suppose when you started work at 14, and worked till you were 65, you feel entitled to say you worked hard. Im sure most of those years probably gave less than 2 weeks holiday a year, and no top up credits, benefits, handouts or other such like

when you did your duty for your country without a second thought and then see yourself getting shoved on the scrapheap with minimal pension (thats if you live past retirement), I suppose some might say you have a right to be miffed

FlipFlop32 · 28/01/2011 15:09

A woman on question time said this last night - wasn't even related to the question that they were discussing!

Original poster
woollyideas · 28/01/2011 16:10

Yeah Flipflop, it was her that inspired me to post this rant open this debate. On Question Time they were talking about the sports commentators' sacking and she actually said 'I'm a businesswoman. I've worked hard all my life and I don't think the lineswoman should have been targeted like that...'

I mean, WTF?

OP posts:
Starbear · 29/01/2011 15:50

LOL Smile I will never go on 'Question Time' I would play that over and over again and hate myself for coming across so dumb.... on the other hand good way to free entertainment. Hmm, might add that to things I will do when I retire, make silly comments on T.V debates Smile

HecateQueenOfWitches · 29/01/2011 16:08

I think it means that they didn't imagine being in whatever situation they are in. That they had plans or an idea of the future that has not worked out.

eg my grandad. Who did work bloody hard all his life. As did my grandma. They worked, and saved, paid off their mortgage, saved loads for their retirement. Planned to enjoy it.

My grandma got altzheimers and my grandad lost much of his sight due to glaucoma and much of his hearing due to working in a very noisy environment for many years. Eventually my grandad could no longer care for my grandma (even with all of our help) and she went into a home. Then she died.

he lived alone in that house, missing her with all his heart. deaf. blind. refusing to come live with my parents. refusing to have anyone live with him. He died of cancer recently.

He said that if he had his time again, he wouldn't bother working so hard or buying his house, or saving. He'd just have spent it as he earned it.

He was a lovely man and I miss him so much. But he was mad as hell about how his and my grandma's life ended. It wasn't what they'd planned for, hoped for, dreamed of.

Now I know none of us get any guarantees in life, but I don't think you can blame someone for being upset when it all goes so badly.

My grandad certainly felt that he'd wasted his time working so hard, saving for a retirement that he never got to enjoy.

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