to hav felt physically sick at this desplay in Poundland?

[MrsFruitcake]

Only popped in because it's DS's birthday next week and someone told me they sell big bags of balloons in there.

Get a pack, and approach the till area with DD (who is 7). On the till end, in clear view to everyone queing, is a display of Condoms and pink vibrating 'love-rings' - cock rings I suppose they would be better known as.

The pinkness of the boxes they are in and the word 'ring' catches DDs attention and she wants to know what they are for. There was definite sniggering from the couple behind us as I struggled to find the right words. I told her they were for grown ups to wear, which wasn't a lie, but she kept pressing me on it and I had to tell her to be quiet in the end.

DD is totally clueless about sex, but even if she weren't, I still don't think I'd like to have to explain what they are for.

I am no prude - but am I right to be angry about the fact that Poundland display them in such a prominent position, exactly where the sweets would normally be? It's wrong on so many levels IMO. I will be writing to them tomorrow.

You see i personally draw a hge line between sexualisation via clothing / porn / anything thatb protrays females (usually) as simple objects for sexual gratification and items that genuinely don;t have any real nastines- it is juts something to play with if you are a couple.

And boxed I think it can be dealt with pretty effectively adn easily tbh. In fact I feel sad that people do think it's disgusting- move to the toiletries arguments fine, no issuues with that, but ones about hiding behind counters or banning from the shop sadden me.

Has anyone suggested hiding them behind counters or banning from shops?That's certainly not been my argument and I didn't notice it when skimming the thread at all.

Of course a distinction can be made between sexualisation that objectifies woman and more general sexualisation, but that doesn't mean sexualisation which doesn't objectify woman is OK for kids. Surely?

Sex for adults is wonderful in it's many forms and expressions and varied pleasures, but should parents be forced into feeling they have to lie about that at the counter in Poundland?

Some things are for discovering when your an adult, this seems to be viewed as terribly old fashioned here, but I find the assumption that any explicit sexual knowledge (which is sexualisation) is OK for 7 yr olds, quite frankly disturbing.

Blondes - juat think - you could have had 18 of them if only you'd shopped wisely ...

Fizzy I agree - Morrisons do seem to be onto something there!!

I think yabu. Once children can read you need to be prepared for all sorts of awkward conversations. My boys (7&8) came out of the toilet the other week asking for some money to put in the "sweetie machine". I just told them those aren't sweets but things that grown ups might need. When they questioned further I simply said when they were old enough to need them they would know what they were. Hardly rocket science......

Mordechai yes there were those suggestions but please forgive, can't be bothered to read entire thread again.

But didn;t imagine it, aprticualrly the behind counters bit- that was explicit- whsilt the banning may well ahve been implicit.

No need to reread the entire thread Peachy I believe you. I only skim read or myself so am likely to have missed stuff.

The general impression I got was the so what, it's just sex, lie to her type response, but Im sure the more hardline hide them far away type response was there too if you say so.

I like to think Im occupying the middle ground .

To be fair though, the vibrating cock rings are an absolute bargain, and work a treat!

Oh fgs all been blown out of proportion in just half a day!

No one said that the op should sit down and explain sex toys or give a bloody demonstration.. Stop skimming threads and read properly if you are going to get holier than thou.

I was surprised that the op had told her dd nothing about sex. Not even where babies come from? Seriously? She doesn't even ask how she came to be? How babies get in a mum's tummy? She got to 7 without even asking? My son asked at 4 and we purchased some age appropriate books and explained the science, we didn't take him to Amsterdam to peruse the windows or discuss sexual techniques. It is a biology lesson. No one was judging they were just a little bit shocked that the dd hadn't asked.

I found a condom packet in the lane behind our house at 6 and heard the most ridiculous explanations from the other kids. We grew up with the Sunday Sport, page 3, Big D nuts topless models but i'm not a sexual deviant. My niece saw an advert for condoms and safe sex on the local bus and asked me what they were. She got a scientific explanation about preventing unwanted pregnancy, not a look of horror and a plea to protect her special flower. Get a bloody grip.

That is all I said, as did some others to the op. Perhaps explaining things scientifically and being rational would stop her being physically sick in pound land. All she needed to say was grown up things.

Granted no one is saying they shouldn't have been there, they are more agape at the Julie Andrews reaction in the title. What do you expect from bloody pound land - it's hardly got a reputation for being a class act has it.

The strongest reaction would be to put your money where your mouth is, and put the items you wanted on the till, complain, and walk out without paying.

Or were they too busy getting the smelling salts out....

I did actually sit with ds1 and do the whole condom thing today; yes he is older but he has ASD and simply could not have comprehended before- pretty much on a par.

And good that I did, becuase I meant and simply for got so this thread has prompted me.

it wasn;t ahrd; it wasn't uncomfy. I decided to skip periods as he can only take in a bit at a time but will go there next few weeks.

I'd much rather my kids be the cool ones in the playground with the accurate knowledge than the try-hards making up crap about mars bar wrappers or whatever.

Though ds1 did ask if you couldn;t just use poundland balloons to save cash: after this thread, I did laugh somewhat.

I just happen to be going to pound land tomorrow now, Exeter branch,if they don't have a washing up bowl and scouring pads. I would like to know what branch you shopped in ,it sounds well stocked I'm dam well out for a bargain now.

YANBU

I believe in telling dcs about sex when they ask questions. I wouldn't have found that embarrassing and would just have made something up but a lot of people (like OP) would. They are in a prominent place where you're stood waiting which gives dcs time to see them.

I'm certainly no prude, my dcs know the facts of life but they're 10 and 13 not 7. Why can't children have any innocence nowadays?

How cool to discuss cock rings and the like with your DCs (condoms a different matter entirely btw - a form of contraception which can be explained in an age-appropriate manner).

What next - butt plugs at Mothercare? Vibrators in Waitrose?

But they need to know about this stuff - it's all out there, after all eh?

To me this is totally on a par with lads' mags on display at supermarkets - nothing to do with prudishness, I just don't see why it should be shoved in my DCs' faces.

And I know it's not the same as the said mags' objectification of women, I object to it as part of the pornification of society and the assumption that the young 'know what it's all about.'

And the OP inbu.

It's probably been said before but YABVVVVVVVU for setting foot in Poundland!!

But YANBU for taking offense at overt display of something really quite gross.

I made a policy of never lying to my first child, she's 11 now. So in that situation I would have said "it's hard to explain, let me see if I can think of how to explain and if I can I will talk to you again about it".

She's just about to start her periods now and not in the least bit self-concious and I honestly think it's because I never babied her about anything rude. If I couldn't answer her questions that's exactly what I told her.

ha ha ha!!!

I'd have told my kids they were for cocks. Male hens.

Just a little update.

I e-mailed Poundland on Monday and they responded very quickly by saying they would get the offended items removed from that area of the store immediately, with apologies for it offending me. It seems they may have been displayed there without following the correct store procedure and product placement plan.

Makes me wonder if anyone else complained now.

I haven't been in to see if they have been moved though!

What, prey tell is a cock ring? Is it jewellery in the shape of a male chicken or decoration for a penis? If it's for a penis, isn't it a bit exhibitionistic for men to be dressing up their do-dah's in this way? And does it fall off when it's cold outside?

Good outcome MF

Perhaps they put them by the till because they are the stock that gets pinched a lot

Well done OP!

Wow I had to join in and comment on how much you lot just cheered me up and made my day fruitcake sorry to make light coz I get ur dilemma but.. catsmama and memo. Ha ha ur funny . She's all distraught and out raged like a veins gonna pop and u go how much .u bargain .ha ha and icing on the cake is annielobeseder with well it is pound land hardly know for being classy

Where's the ZOMBIE ALERT gone?

So...someone Google 'cock ring' then...