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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to ask that he shuts the bloody en suite door

39 replies

Pupudushku · 22/01/2011 22:39

when he goes for nocturnal wees? It's completely tiled and the sound of his echoey pissing wakes me up, generally about 15 minutes after I have managed to fall asleep. If he would just shut the bathroom door it wouldn't be a problem.

I have asked him and asked him to close the door but he just won't.

Ended up with a blazing row last night and he stomped off to sleep in the spare room, yelling at me on the way for "nagging", and me lying awake until after 2am feeling upset and angry.

I hate the bloody en suite! We only have it because the house came with it. I'd love to do away with it.

OP posts:
MrIckle · 22/01/2011 22:41

YANBU - how sodding inconsiderate! Do you shut the door?

OutrageousFlavourLikeFreesias · 22/01/2011 22:43

YANBU, but based on the evidence, neither asking nicely or getting mad are going to make him shut the door. And it's not good for either of you to be having massive rows about a door at 2am. More creativity required.

Next time he does it, get out of bed and moon him through the door. Possibly while humming a tune very loudly. If nothing else, it'll make you feel better. :)

Original poster
Pupudushku · 22/01/2011 22:46

Yes I do shut the door!

Splosh, splosh, splosh. Pause. Has he finished? No! Splosh, splosh, splosh. Schlop, schlop, schlop. No flush. Back to bed.

I was thinking maybe I should start putting the bedside light on when I go to the bathroom? That could be a fair swap?

OP posts:
GreenEyesandHam · 22/01/2011 22:48

I have a similar issue.

My hubby (ok, MANshape, whatever) uses the en suite then leaves the door open, meaning I have to lie in bed, FEET I tell you, FEET from all the toilet fumes emanating from within.

Similar to the issue of public loos, when you have to enter the cubicle immediately after someone vacates. It's not about 'poo smell', just breathing in someone elses...vapour

Confused
abenstille · 22/01/2011 22:49

put one of those door closers on, like they have on fire doors Wink

Karaishere · 22/01/2011 22:50

That would annoy me too

You should turn it into a walk in wardrobe Grin I would love one of those...

Original poster
Pupudushku · 22/01/2011 22:53

I'd love one too. Bathrooms galore but no storage space. I would just move the door so that you'd enter via the landing rather than the bedroom but we just had the sodding thing retiled when we moved in and it would bugger all that up.

Honestly. Why would you want a bog in the bedroom? Nasty.

OP posts:
Original poster
Pupudushku · 22/01/2011 22:55

GreenEyes, so what happens if you get up and shut it yourself? Does he have a go at you? Mine would take that as a dig. Can't win!

OP posts:
GreenEyesandHam · 22/01/2011 22:59

I totally agree, en suites are one of the most shittest ideas ever.

Toilet smells? Let's introduce them to the bedroom!

Caught short in the middle of the night? Wake your partner, to 'share'!

'Lying in' in bed of a morning, let's listen to the sounds...gentle breeze, birdsong, ah yes! The sound of teeth-brushing and simultaneous gagging

Hrumph

FairhairedandFrustrated · 22/01/2011 23:02

Mine trips over a shoe box at the end of the bed every night.... then mutters...

If he doesn't have the sense to move it then I certainly am not going to do it for him Grin

GreenEyesandHam · 22/01/2011 23:02

Soz, lost internet connection lol

I make a total point of shutting myself, he usually mumbles 'sorry....zzzzzzz'

Carrotsandcelery · 22/01/2011 23:03

Mine does this, and leaves it open when he gets up hugely early for work and showers, when he knows I have been up half the night and don't have to get up for another hour.
It would be sooooo easy for them just to shut the door.
He also leaves the wardrobe door open, which is on my side of the bed. The fuse box is in there so when the dcs get up and put on all the lights I get woken by the box gently buzzing away. He is a gentle man but gets strangely hostile when I ask him to slide it shut at night.
Can you put some paper down the loo before you go to bed? Would that mask the noise?
You have my total sympathy.

thenightsky · 22/01/2011 23:12

See now, I prefer him to leave the door open as it is the shutting the door noise that wakes me Grin

Your fundamental mistake OP, if I may say so, was fully tiling the ensuite and, in the process, making it into an echo chamber.

Carrotsandcelery · 22/01/2011 23:18

Time for a few towels and a bathmat and some tapestries on the wall.
You are right nightsky the door closing would wake me too.
Maybe a lock on the loo is the answer, assuming there is another one close at hand. Grin

rupert1 · 23/01/2011 00:43

That is horrible being woken up hearing that tinkle tinkle, by the way there has always been a Men sit down to wee notice in toilets in our house and it works also never a splash of urine.This works very well with young boys they cannot aim into the toilet.Anyway your husband is a rude pig not respecting your wishes.Unfortunately en suites are too close to bedrooms sometimes built for people that like there own smells too much and cant be bothered to walk very far,be very careful here the next move of your lazy husband could be to sleep beside you on a commode seat how revolting.Tell him there have been a few changes round here padlock the en suite door tell him he must use another toilet or he is going to have to leave home, do it nicely maybe over a cup of coffee

FaffTastic · 23/01/2011 00:46

YANBU.

He really is taking the piss

Wink

and Blush at such a bad cheesy joke.

tallwivglasses · 23/01/2011 00:52

Can't get over being Envy that you've got an en suite.

Dre-e-eam, dream...dream dream dre-eeam...

midori1999 · 23/01/2011 01:27

Can't you ask if he'd consider sitting down to wee instead of standing up if he won't shut the door? That would be quieter.

Our en-suite door can't shut, it has my long cardigans hung over the corner (they are too long for our silly built in wardrove that has an odd shelf about 18" off the ground for shoes) but it would take more than DH using the en-suite to wake me up. It is his alarm set for an hour before I need to get up and 30 mins before he needs to just so he can press 'snooze' that annoys me...

OnlyMeUK · 23/01/2011 02:04

Mine does this partially (1/2 shut), but aren't we all on a sorta half sleep autopilot when piddling mid-sleep. Argueing 'till your blue in the face won't help any, just make sure everyone is wide awake!

researchinmotion · 23/01/2011 02:09

Take a mild laxative.

Go to bed.

Wake him up just before it takes 'effect'.

Go to the loo.

Leave the door open.

Grin
WimpleOfTheBallet · 23/01/2011 02:18

This is why I HATE them...we had one in ourold house and I just think it's too close to the bedroom for shit and piss!

DH used to poo in ours and ..well...I don't want to smell THAT when I am lying in my bed

HORRID!

diddl · 23/01/2011 09:17

Depending on his age, if he´s getting up for a wee everynight I´d send him to the Dr.

My husband has D&V atm.
I´m so glad we don´t have an ensuite..!

ledkr · 23/01/2011 09:40

mine uses the en suite at 6am too,i am 39 wks pg and not sleeping too well so last half hr before i get up is annoying.Also had an orange nocturnal piss and doesnt flush "in case it wakes me" i think the sound of a fire hose being directed down the toilet has already done that,god knows what it will be like when baby in our room Hmm

Carrotsandcelery · 23/01/2011 09:45

I also experience the alarm an hour before he has to get up which he presses snooze for and promptly goes back to sleep while I lie there awake worrying about stuff, unable to get back to sleep. Pffft!

purepurple · 23/01/2011 09:59

This is why I am never having an ensuite.

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