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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

I am being precious. But I still wanna go "'urgh you are disgusting"

100 replies

Pancakeflipper · 20/01/2011 12:06

I am being precious.

I work 3 days a week. I sit next to a colleague. It is very obvious whose desk is whose.

They insist on chucking their banana skins ( I hate bananas even with my kids I am cringing cutting up a banana and handling the skins), apple cores, sweet wrappings ( don't mind that easy to pick up) and used teaspoons they used for their yoghurts. With all the lick marks on.

And I want scream " stop chucking it on my desk you gross person. "

But I think I am being precious. So I remove the debris myself shuddering.

Every Monday there are stains on my desk which I have to clean cos' my imagination will go into overdrive on what it is.

I put a in-tray between us last week. It was gone this Monday. He said "there was no room for me coffee, hope you don't mind". Our desks are massive and he has no clutter on his.

I don't want to fall out with him. But how do I get over myself? I need to loosen up.

OP posts:
TheVisitor · 20/01/2011 12:34

I'd say in a jokey tone "Urgh, get your minging banana off my desk.

Get to your own side!"

tethersend · 20/01/2011 12:36

Bring in a basket of dirty washing and tip it on his desk whilst he's typing. Say nothing; sit down and continue working.

tethersend · 20/01/2011 12:37

Or tip the bin.

MissBeehiving · 20/01/2011 12:41

How disgusting and you are not being precious. I'd spit in his coffee, in front of him. Or perhaps leave a urine sample on his desk to demonstrate the joys of sharing desks. Urine is sterile you know, so probably more hygienic than his banana skin.

fel1x · 20/01/2011 12:44

Could you ask him to do you a favour and keep an eye out on the days when you are not in the office as you keep finding banana skins and other crap on your desk and you're not sure who it is? If he spots who it is, can he tell them its disgusting? thanks Wink

SecretNutellaFix · 20/01/2011 13:02

Get an apple core and grind it into their desk.
Hide the teaspoons in a drawer.
Stuff the sweet wrappers in their coat pockets.

Banana skin? Again, drop it into a drawer.

If he's too fucking lazy to put it in a bin, he deserves to have his fingers stapled to the desk.

peanutbutterkid · 20/01/2011 13:08

LOL @ Tethersend.
That is minging, OP, you are so not being precious or U, and this from someone who normally think most MN threads about minging personal habits are completely prissy nonsense, but your office-mate is so out of order.

I suppose FloridaLover's idea is the right tactic.

bumperella · 20/01/2011 13:15

He's trying it on to proove what a Big Man he is. Stop clearing up HIS rubbish, tell him (politely) "please put your rubbish in the bin, not on my desk". Don't be nicey-nice about it, just tell him straight.
The guy is an arse.

EricNorthmansMistress · 20/01/2011 13:19

I don't understand. He leaves rubbish on your desk? And you haven't told him to do one? Are you a doormat? FFS!

researchinmotion · 20/01/2011 13:19

I'm with SecretNutellaFix that is what I would do - infact I was just typing almost the very same thing.

Tell him straight.

What would happen if you knocked his coffee cup all over his work. Shock

FindingStuffToChuckOut · 20/01/2011 13:23

Throw it back, or tell him to grow up & take care of his own stuff. If he puts his coffee on your desk put it back on his desk one time. If he puts it on your desk again, throw coffee down sink & his cup in the bin.

Or even better just confront him, tell him is pissing you off big time & please stop it NOW!

Pixieonthemoor · 20/01/2011 13:24

For the other days, are you at home with wee ones? Are they in nappies? Take in a nappy sack of dirty (not just wet) nappies and dump it on his desk. When he protests, say "well, you leave your sh*t all over MY desk so I thought I would do the same". Grin

RunawayFishWife · 20/01/2011 13:25

Put the in tray back and if he moves it tell him you do mind .

Or just drop a used tampax or two on his desk

ScarlettWalking · 20/01/2011 13:26

He is trying to intimidate you and rank his status. It is actually quite serious.

You are SO not being precious. Tell him straight to his face that he needs to stop pushing his garbage on your desk - seriously take the bull firmly by the horns here.

Deciduousblonde · 20/01/2011 13:30

Am I being unreasonable to really want to crap in a sandwich bag and leave it on his desk?

Because really, if it wasn't for DNA testing I would.

What a scumbag!

Pancakeflipper · 20/01/2011 13:33

I have been doing my unattractive snort-laugh at some of these responses..... Hilarious....

Those who refer to him etching his Top Dog status, I think you have hit on something I have missed. I was Top Dog. But reduce my hours greatly and my status has reduced. I am ok with it.... It's not an issue to me do Zi didn't spot it. My choice and I like the reduced stress levels. Is this him telling me " hey little lady, this is my domain now, now clean up chick.."

I shall have to brave about the yucky rubbish on my desk. Stop being chicken...

OP posts:
GrendelsMum · 20/01/2011 13:41

No, don't do any of this passive-agressive stuff. I think that what Kitty said above is spot on when she said 'Please don't litter my desk with your stuff, Bob - I need to keep my work area clean and tidy'

No 'sorry', no excuses. If he does it again, you point it out again, in the same words.

bobbityboo · 20/01/2011 13:42

The fact that he moved your in tray from your own desk is really cheeky.
If it was me at work (we used to hot-desk across shifts and everyone was very territorial about their desk area) I would take control by telling him that he may use your desk for his coffee when you are not there, but that he must keep his rubbish to his own desk.

lifeinlimbo · 20/01/2011 13:42

I agree with all the other posters here and you should carry out every suggestion. Especially this one "Go and slap him round the face with his old banana skin, then report back asap. " Grin

But if he puts cups of coffee on your desk, this is a good thing you should encourage. Drink it and thank him for being thoughtful for once.

lifeinlimbo · 20/01/2011 13:46

And always put all the crap back on HIS desk, its not yours to put in the bin. Shout BIN at him if he still doesnt get it.

aStarWithHerOwnWays · 20/01/2011 13:56

'Put your rubbish in the bin you disgusting imbecile, were you born in a barn or something?' Accompanied by withering look of scorn at his lack of manners.

Or just take a shit on his desk.

(Seriously though, I agree that he is trying to be Top Bollock and put one over on the little lady, which means you need to assert yourself in firm and professional manner. Tell him once, tell him twice and tell him that you will involve management if he persists in behaving like an oaf.)

GrimmaTheNome · 20/01/2011 14:01

Just be glad he's not a dog. He'd be cocking his leg - at least marking with banana skins isn't quite that bad! Grin

OK, its 2pm - where are the remains of todays lunch? Where is his coffee cup? If they're on your desk we will be very cross with you.

nickelbabysnatcher · 20/01/2011 14:12

You're being a doormat.

Tell him, like the others have said, that He must not put his rubbish on your desk, nor use your desk as extension of yours.

If you find coffee mug stains on your desk, you mus tell him that he's made a mess on your desk and he must clean it up.
Do this every single time he makes a mess, of whatever kind.

Be firm and polite, and if you have to ask him for more than a week, tell your boss.

Plumm · 20/01/2011 14:14

You're not precious at all. As everyone else has said, move anything (rubbish, coffee cups, anything) he leaves on your desk back to his desk, and don't let him move things around/off of your desk.

Pancakeflipper · 20/01/2011 14:46

Grimma - I am not working today... I'll let you know Monday on the how disgusting my desk is. I feel I disappoint you. In fact what are you doing Monday - fancy some banana skin chucking?

I thought I might be not be seeing things with a sense of perspective. Cos' why do it if vile....?

But next week - standards, there will be standards at our desks.....

OP posts: