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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

All those clever SAHM who feel undervalued

74 replies

jonicomelately · 20/01/2011 10:21

I've put in AIBU for attention.

Perhaps I should let the dust settle over the Riven story but...

I just want to say that there are lots of amazing, clever, savvy women on here and yet we have thread after thread about people feeling useless and how our talents, lives are going to waste.

The Riven story demonstrates the immense responsibility of Local Governments and the power they have to change lives.

When the time arises I want to ask all of you out there to consider standing as Councillors. Only then will we have a chance of getting the society we want. It will be tough and time-consuming but I see a lot of people on here with better ideas and a damn sight more humanity than many of the local politicians I've encountered.

That's all really.

OP posts:
Lonnie · 20/01/2011 10:23

I Would stand but then I would have all theese MNfriends whom would want me to do a load of stuff Shock

Original poster
jonicomelately · 20/01/2011 10:25
Grin
OP posts:
BuzzLightBeer · 20/01/2011 10:35

You still have the problems of childcare though, don't you?

Original poster
jonicomelately · 20/01/2011 10:45

Yes, but some of the work can be done from home or in the evenings when the kids are in bed.
As I said, it's time-consuming and therefore not for everyone Smile

OP posts:
ManicMother7777 · 20/01/2011 19:56

But you'd have to be committed to a particular political party wouldn't you? I couldn't do it for that reason.

BeerTricksPotter · 20/01/2011 20:02

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
jonicomelately · 20/01/2011 20:10

Yes you can stand as an Independent. They are quite common in Local Govt and the beauty is you can vote impartially on any issue.

OP posts:
Original poster
jonicomelately · 20/01/2011 20:11

Btw I started this thread ages ago.

I know there have been a recent spate of Riven threads....

OP posts:
BeerTricksPotter · 20/01/2011 20:22

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Xenia · 20/01/2011 20:41

The answer is don't be mugs, don't be slaves, don't be servants. Get out there not as unpaid councillors but go out and run BP, run the cabinet, be a top QC, a leading surgeon and leave men to clean up at home. As long as women are prepared to do worthless tasks for no pay society will not ensure there is proper help. Don't be a whipping boy and martyr mother - do as men do and get yourself economically valued and out earn the men. It's huge fun and better for everyone all round.

LemonDifficult · 20/01/2011 20:45

Joni - are you a councillor?

(Good OP btw, I agree)

HerBeX · 20/01/2011 20:47

Is being a councillor worthless then Xenia?

Loopymumsy · 20/01/2011 20:48

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
jonicomelately · 20/01/2011 20:56

Can't women be Captains of Industry, top lawyers etc and involved in local politics Xenia? Lots of men do precisely that.

Lemon. I'm not a Councillor atm but I am a polital animal and I believe local issues are something more of us should try to get involved in, despite the fact it isn't as glamorous as the Westminster Village.

OP posts:
lifeinlimbo · 20/01/2011 21:44

I like Xenia's posts. She is always original and always provides a controversial viewpoint - good for debate!

Although what do you do with all your earnings Xenia, and what does that have in common with running BP and running the country? - You decide how to spend it. I dont know the value of local authority budgets but Im sure its not small, and has a huge impact on your environment, surroundings and your area's ability to be successful, prosperous and happy.

Also, being a councillor gives a good introduction to politics and is a step up to being an MP - Diane Abbott started off as a local councillor, and that led to her running for leadership of the labour party!

I always thought being a councillor was a paid job though?

DuplicitousBitch · 20/01/2011 21:46

you do get paid

Xenia · 20/01/2011 21:57

Yes, but it's not high. We need many more women out earning their husbands before we will inch towards a modicum of equality in this country, not mroe woemn at home earning nothing cleaning children's bottoms. Leave all that to the men until we've 80% of positions of real economic power held by women and then I'll let a few of you skulk back into kitchens if you really feel you belong there.

whoknowswhatthefutureholds · 20/01/2011 22:06

xenia - you are dull.

lifeinlimbo · 20/01/2011 22:10

Um, we're talking about running a county or city, not bottoms!

Anyone know how much? Dupli?

It is a position with real economic power Xenia, thats exactly what Im saying. Also, women have different priorities to men, and thats why its important they are represented in government - that includes how children are raised, the environment etc.

lifeinlimbo · 20/01/2011 22:14

Also its the council deciding how much 'womens work' and 'mens work' should be paid. This led to the suing of (birmingham??) council because they had such a huge inequality, such as paying bonuses to men and not women. Men ended up being paid £50,000 for bin-collecting, and women got only £9,000 for things like teaching special needs children and being care workers.

Original poster
jonicomelately · 20/01/2011 22:35

Dealing with local government issues is a massive job. The responsibilities and budgets are huge.
I know you mean well Xenia but the kind of thing I'm talking about here isn't sitting on a parish council talking about whether or not to replace the bus shelter.

OP posts:
lifeinlimbo · 20/01/2011 22:45

Whether children are fed good freshly cooked food or turkey twizzlers for school dinners also came down to councils iirc.

Countries with more equal government representation become more equal as a whole, and fairer and more prosperous to boot :)

duchesse · 20/01/2011 22:53

I think that the reason most women don't go out and run BP or the country once they have children is that they simply don't trust any man to look after their children properly. And actually I think they have a point. Even my very egalitarian DH is prone to letting the baby stay up till 11pm because he's busy watching telly, forgets to feed her and prefers to cook junk than fresh food. We are trapped by our love for our children. I don't know what the solution is.

I always wanted to run BP but I also wanted children. I now earn a tiny fraction of my earning potential at 23. I don't regret having the children but it has been the death of any ambition I may once have had.

TheHeathenOfSuburbia · 20/01/2011 22:58

It's not that easy to be elected as a councillor, though, is it? You have to be selected by a party in a winnable ward, and then you have to campaign in the ward and get lots of people to vote for you.
Obviously you can run as an independent, but you're unlikely to get elected unless you have v high profile for some other reason.

And frankly, 'let's pay higher council tax so we can have better services for the disabled' isn't a message that gets you elected.

But fair play to you, it's a good suggestion. If you want to change the world, you have to start somewhere!

(Lib Dem member, sometime campaigner here)

(I used to say that with pride Blush)

Alibabaandthe40nappies · 20/01/2011 23:05

Xenia you often speak sense, but your idea of what a SAHM does is stuck about 25-30 years ago.

I am at home because I want to raise my child, I believe I am the best person for that job.

I spend very little of my time in the kitchen, in fact DH spends more time in there than I do. It isn't all frilly pinnys and having the dinner on the table you know Wink

I am educated, qualified, and when the time is right for me and us as a family I will go back to work. It isn't an either/or situation.