to think friends DD is a lying little tell tale and deliberately wanted to get DS into trouble!

[superv1xen]

had my friends and their DD round this afternoon for lunch and so the kids could play etc.

friends DD and my DS are both 4. they play nicely generally but she is a bit princessy and whiny and cries easily, IMO, for attention, as, if she so much as makes one whinge slightly unhappy sound her mum snaps to attention, "ooooh dear whats the matter darling" kind of thing.

well they were playing in DS's room and after a while she came downstairs whinging about something and kind of, pretend crying. and when asked whats the matter by her mum, she said "DS has hit me" but i could tell by her face she was making it up, and if he HAD have hit her, she would have been hysterical as thats how she is. you could just tell how she was telling the story she was making it up as she went along. And if you all knew DS, you would know he is not the type to "hit" people, he is a placid, gentle, loving little boy, and if anyone is the hitting, bullying type, its her. in fact not only have i seen her bully DS, i have seen her aim sly kicks and pushes at my youngest (19 months) when she thinks no one is looking

so i called DS down and asked him what happened, and he said he hadn't hit her, but it was blatantly obvious my friends didnt believe him, they believed their precious DD, so i felt obliged to tell him off to kind of keep the peace and send him back to his room for time out :( and i am so angry at myself for doing that. esp as brat friends dd carried on crowing about what a "naughty boy" DS was etc for about half an hour afterwards.

i love my friend but i really disliked her DD today and their attitude towards DS :(

Since they have been thoughtfully provided by the OP, it may be said that they not only provide the possibility of RL identification of the child in question, but also the possibility of taking your own position on how seriously to take the OP's opinions as to this girl's character. Bless.

what is this supposed to mean animula ? if you have something to say, just come out with it.

lol well i didnt understand it either vixen - nice dance pole though!

Telling off your son when you think he was in the right is incredibly mean.

If he hadn't done it then he probably now thinks that you'll disbelieve him all the time.

Poor little guy. I hope you've apologised and made it up to him and told him you believe him.

My parents blamed me for things as a child that I hadn't done. It stays with you and it still irks me when I think of it.

My heart breaks for your son.

:(

i shouldnt have pictures on my profile really. i think i will take them off. either that or i should have name changed for this.

This: What does it feel like to have someone treading the line between mn and RL and being a bitch about you? Making judgments, and broadcasting them all over the internet.

Your pix are still up, so someone, somewhere out there, is reading this, and laughing, or thinking "Oh yes!". About you. And you may already know them. Or you may meet them next week, next year, or tomorrow.

Not a nice feeling.

And that's what you've done/are doing, to a 4 year old, and her mother.

Poor behaviour, in my book.

Good point Moongirl, and I bet that's what's really riled the OP.

Forget the side show about whether it's ok or not to dislike someone who's behaving badly just because they're child and talk to your son about this.

Explain that you made a bad call as the situation didn't give you enough time to think and that you feel that you've told him off in error.

That's the big deal in this situation and your DS needs to hear it.

And do you understand that I don't actually give a shit, on account of the fact that said mother and said child would probably have to be sherlock fecking holmes to put two and two together and identify themselves. I woudlnt dream of saying those things if i thought it would get back to my friend. I think Supervixen might have made a slight error of judgement there but then i wouldnt put pics of my children mnet anyway - simply so i can say what i like as no one knows me! Readable by anyone forever? If anyone is still interested in this thread next month i'll be surprised, forever? Really?? you think? nah.

Of course some children are ghastly, and I didn't attack the OP for not liking this little girl. We've all been there. But I do think it's a bit questionable to describe her in the way she has, as though she is a particular TYPE of child rather than a child who is going through a particularly unpleasant phase. And I do really question the other posters weighing in with their own views of her.

My dd has a difficult time with one of the girls in her class, who often attacks her. The scenarios I play out inside my skull about what I could do to this kid are not pretty... so of course I keep them firmly inside my head. We've been asked to do playdates with this girl and I've said no - my job is to protect my dd. But the one thing I won't do is slag her off to the other parents in the class, and spread the word about how vile she is. Because this time next year she may have blossomed into a great kid, and it's just not fair to label her to other people at the age of four.

That's the distinction, I think.

I think its absolutely ok to say what we like about a third party on here. So long as there is never a likelihood of it getting back to third party.

No, we absolutely cannot say what we like when its about people on here, TO people on here or about issues likely to cause offense or hurt. That is the distinction.

You are entitled of course to form your own opinion about me, which of course, is totally wrong you understand

okk animula i take your point. thats completely fair what you have said.

i thought you were making a judgement based on how i looked or that you knew me in RL or something

but have now removed pics. well i hope its worked anyway

Ha ha ha I came on here and called my cousin's three devilspawn DCs cunts after they ransacked my home and bullied my lovely DS. I got my buns toasted that day, I can tell you.

loooool bupcakes :o

bupcakes, i likes you! lolol

I think that is the thing though, it is when the behaviour has been directed at your child you will be vitriolic about the perpetrator.

I like you too, brightlights. Let's share a gin and a fag.

There are saints on MN who never lose their temper, who never say mean things about children, who never do a shit that doesn't smell like Chanel No.5. There are mere mortals on here that make the mistake of speaking in the heat of the moment and get branded the next Myra Hindley for being a bit rude about an unruly kid. That's life on MN.

can i join you and bright in a gin and a fag too?? actually make mine a jd n coke

Erm, make mine a straight brandy and i'm sorry girls, but if you are going to smoke you are going to have to go and stand in the street!

superv1xen - your photos were nice, in all honesty. and you looked like an adoring mother (in a good way).

Hope the next time they all come over to play it goes better.

kicks cupcakes up the bunting, never never and thrice never! now drink this brandy it will do you good!

LOL at bupcakes. She wins

thanks animula :)