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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Dad pronouncing my DD's name incorrectly

68 replies

JoanFontaine · 13/01/2011 21:37

I've namechanged as am about to divulge the names of my DCs.

My DD is called Esmé. That is, Esmé pronounced Ez-May rather than Ez-mee.

When we chose it, DH and I agreed that it as it is one of those names which have two common pronounciations, we would just swallow that fact and not get all het up about people saying it "wrong" because life is too short.

However we did choose to use the accent as a pointer to our preferred prounciation (and also 'cause Salinger's charcter has an accent and we chose the name partly because of that because we love it.)

Anyway...My dad insists on calling her Ez-mee. It pisses me off royally. Because while I don't expect random teachers etc to get it right all the time, I think her grandfather could make a bloody effort to say her name correctly. He speaks good French too, so he knows what the accent is for!

I've said, "It's Ez-MAY, dad" several times but it just doesn't seem to sink in, and he behaves as though I'm being insanely picky for mentioning it.

DH thinks I'm not being totally U, but reminds me that we agreed that we weren't going to get wound up about it. I think I'm right to be annoyed.

What do you think, AIBU?

OP posts:
thisisyesterday · 13/01/2011 21:38

it's annoying, but if you've told him before i am not sure there is much else you can do

i would try and ignore... when she is old enough i'm sure she'll tell him herself and then maybe he'll listen Smile

BringOnTheGoat · 13/01/2011 21:40

YANBU - your dad should get it right - agree with point about strangers - not family - odd!

Rannaldini · 13/01/2011 21:40

yabu

maybe you should change the way you say it?

GreenEyesandHam · 13/01/2011 21:40

No I'd be peed off with my dad as well.

And I've never heard it pronounced Ez-mee at all

ItsMeMo · 13/01/2011 21:41

I've never heard it pronounced Ez-mee either.

KirstyAllsoap · 13/01/2011 21:42

YANBU

Start calling him something annoying to drive the point home.

ENormaSnob · 13/01/2011 21:45

Yanbu

fluffygal · 13/01/2011 21:48

YANBU. My FiL gets my DD's name wrong all the time, he pronounces it with a long a like aaaarghh rather then a short a. He knows it drives me mental so I think he does it on purpose, lol.

aPixieInMyCaramelLatte · 13/01/2011 21:49

Another one that's never heard it pronounced Ez-Mee.

My mum can pronounce but not spell my ds2's name. It's not hard. It's a 5 letter name and 4 of the letters are the same. Argggg.

Yanbu.

leafinthewind · 13/01/2011 21:49

Can he hear the difference?

Katey1010 · 13/01/2011 21:49

YANBU. Ez-may is definitely the right pronunciation.

Although in our case, my Dad pronounced DDs name differently, everyone liked it more, DH asked if we could change and now we use the new pronunciation.

This was a name where there were two distinct forms and DH just liked his version more.

aPixieInMyCaramelLatte · 13/01/2011 21:50

I meant 2 lots of 2 letters not all 4 letters.

Never mind, i'll shut up now.

ChickensFlyingUnderTheRadar · 13/01/2011 21:51

YANBU to be irritated, but maybe it'd help if you change your perspective. See it as his nickname/pet name for her. My Dad calls my eldest an elongated version of his name. It's special between them. Also, does he just have an accent that makes the Ez-mee pronounciation more logical to him?

Muira · 13/01/2011 21:55

YANBU ...in your case, because the final e has the acute accent on it, the only pronunciation is Ez-May.

ohnoshedittant · 13/01/2011 22:00

pixie I'm glad you clarified that I was thinking what name has 5 letters, where four are the same?

xMrsSx · 13/01/2011 22:00

I'm glad you pointed that out aPixie - I have just spent 10 mins tryinkg to work out what 5 letter name has 4 letters the same Blush until I scrolled down!

kittybuttoon · 13/01/2011 22:04

I can't help calling my nephew 'Jakey'. His father hates it, but little Jake seems to like it, so I'm carrying on.

My Dad used to deliberately pronounce my name wrong, as a gesture of affection.

Maybe your Dad is developing a more intimate relationship with Esme, by pronouncing her name 'his' way.

IneedacleanerIamalazyslattern · 13/01/2011 22:05

Some people just don't hear the difference though.
To you it is a massive difference but if me personally says the name out loud there is not a huge sounding difference but if I say them in my head I can make them sound very different.

TheSecondComing · 13/01/2011 22:06

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

coldtits · 13/01/2011 22:07

I KNEW your daughter's name would be esme before I opened this thread. I just KNEW.

said · 13/01/2011 22:09

I knew this would be about Esme. Only one I've known was Ez mee so yab a bit u

Onetoomanycornettos · 13/01/2011 22:09

My father has mispronounced my husband's name which is a common one, (spelt differently), for seven years. After a while you just stop banging your head on a wall pronouncing it VERY CLEARLY all the time and give up. You have obviously not reached this stage yet!

chitchatinsantasear · 13/01/2011 22:10

Kittybutton - if you were my sis or SIL I'd throttle you!

My DSs have names that can be shortened/changed and we have made it perfectly clear that they are not to be to all the family.

GwendolineMaryLacey · 13/01/2011 22:14

I've only ever heard Ez-mee as well

troisgarcons · 13/01/2011 22:21

Frankly - if you give pretentious names to children - expect them to go through life being pissed off becaus no one can pronounce it correctly! YOU! have given your child a burden to bear .....and from your OP ....random teachers generally have something like 200 names per year group to memorise ..... so exatly why do you think you are special?

I'm surprised the registrar didn't councel you against a ridiculous name.