leaving baby alone in car

[monkeyfeet]

Last night I was walking through retail centre carpark with my son and saw a car with a baby asleep in a child seat in the back of the car. I had a look around there was no one about ant the car was a fair way from the shops so i tried doors they were locked. I didnt have my mobile phone on me so went into the nearest shop and told the manager to phone the police or make an announcement, so we went out again to get the registration and confirm the car was still there it was. Then we went back into the shop to phone I decided i would go back out and see if anyone showed up but by this time I saw the car driving away. All of this was over the course of about 15 mins no one had been keeping an eye on the car or they would have seen me trying to get in the store manager trying to get in and come over. It was freezing outside and the baby looked to be about 6 months old.

So the store manager decided not to ring the police as they had gone but when i got home I rang the non emergency line to make a report. Hopefully it was someone being thoughtless and not negligent and a visit from the polce could make them understand what is not appropriate.

But AIBU to report this to the police?

[MollieO]

I don't think being a lone parent is a let off clause at all.

[floridalover]

CARS CAN AND DO GO ON FIRE WHEN THE ENGINE IS SWITCHED OFF. I HAVE PERSONAL EXPERIENCE OF THIS. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES SHOULD CHILDREN BE LEFT IN CARS UNATTENDED

[seeker]

It is a bloody sight more dangerous to be driving along with your children in the car than leaving them in it with the door locked for 15 minutes!


Children die every day in moving cars. I have never hear of one dying in a stationary one. Unless it's parked on the hard shouldrer of a motorway. Which I presume this one wasn't.


People have seriously skewed ideas about relative risk, the really do.

[BuzzLightBeer]

and another

[Teaandcakeplease]

I live in a 3rd floor flat and if I've been out for the day and when I return they're both asleep, I have to carry them upstairs one at a time and then return for the other, as I'm not strong enough to carry them both at the same time. So that is also a situation where one of them is briefly left in the car sometimes. Not often though.

I wasn't saying being a lone parent is a let off clause though, I spent a long time writing my original post in the hope of trying to state how I felt, but that wasn't what I was trying to say, but I'm not articulate enough for AIBU I think so I'll bow out at this point and leaving it there.

[annoyingdevil]

Although, I wouldn't leave a baby for 15 mins, I cannot believe that a woman was hassled by police for leaving a 10 and 12 year old in the car. This is absolute madness.

I sometimes leave my 4 and half year old in the car for a few mins whilst I drop his sister at school. This is his choice, when the weather is bad. Ditto when paying for petrol.

As for those that say, cars can spontaneously combust, well I'm sure they can, in the same way I could get struck by lightening whilst paying for petrol.

[BreconBeBuggered]

I think the OP did the right thing in this instance. But there's surely a distinction between popping out to pay for petrol, move one child out of the vehicle at a time etc when the clear intention is to return immediately to the car, and swanning off to do a spot of shopping without knowing how long it might take.

[BlueCollie]

YANBU hoever, to all those that think you can't leave a child under 16 alone in a car...are you mad???? So I take it your child is never allowed to go out on their bike or to the park on their own??? Or out with their friends anywhere??? Really not teaching your child to be independant then or even showing them you trust them to be sensible in a locked car.....jesus what do you think is going to happen to an older child in locked car.

[HappySeven]

I find some of the comments on here quite scary. I have left my children in the car and have always weighed up the various risks before doing so. To say that no child under 12 should be left is bizarre - those same children could be married in 4 years (or parents themselves soon?) and yet aren't to be trusted to behave in a car?

I am not condoning leaving a baby/child as in the OP but there has to be some balance.

[Onetoomanycornettos]

Cupcakes, I have had the same situation in both the properties I've lived with with children, the garage/parking space is not within sight of the front door and so to move one child (or take one child and strap them in) you have to briefly leave the other.

Mostly they can come together, especially now they are walking, but there have been times when that's not possible (e.g. both sleeping and have to be carried in, one been sick, and so on).

Personally, I've always left mine in the car at the petrol pumps and locked the door on the basis that toddlers crossing busy forecourts is much more dangerous than sitting in a locked car.

I do agree though that babies should not be left for long, a minute or two is one thing and if anything bad happened, you would see it on your quick return. 20 min or longer is not ok IMO.

[Onetoomanycornettos]

I do leave my children in the car, though, sometimes, if one goes into ballet and the other (seven year old) is reading, I've allowed her to stay in the car for five min on her own. I'm sure not all parents would do this, but personally I feel it's fine. Longer than that and I take her with me.

[Pesha]

They're going to set themselves alight with an aerosol Bluecollie, didn't you read the link below?!

I often leave my dc in the car for a few minutes while nipping into a small shop/paying for petrol etc. Although I wouldn't leave the youngest if going into a supermarket as it seems a much further distance and you never know how long the queues will be etc, think I did leave the older 2 (7 and 10) once wathcing a dvd in the car for about 20 mins after they pleaded with me to let them! My reasons for not leaving the youngest would be more about him getting upset for some reason and busybodys reporting me than any outside risk.

Have also left them asleep in the car on the driveway many a time for ages. I can see them easily from my window and check frequently. Never occurred to me there was any more risk than leaving them upstairs asleep or inside while I'm in the garden. Had forgotten the risks of spontaneous combustion obviously!

[faeriefruitcake]

Go to Morrison's i have found at on at least 6 occasions young children and babies left in cars.

When I complained to the store in writing they basically said it wasn't their problem as did the manager of Lidle when i saw on e there.

I just phone the police now

[BuzzLightBeer]

busybody

[JockTamsonsBairns]

What exactly is it that you're afraid might happen in those couple of minutes though? Nobody has offered any answer to that genuine question - other than the car might burst into flames. Really? I've been a motorist for 21 years, and I've never witnessed a car spontaneously catch fire. If your DH/DP is with you, does the whole family go in to pay for the petrol then?

[BuzzLightBeer]

its the peedos lurking on every street corner and supermarket car-park innit Jock?

[wheredidyoulastseeit]

cars can catch fire, my childminders did years ago. after the event she said she almost left the kids (hers and mine) in the car as she was only going to be away for a couple of minutes but decided not to and went through the hassle of getting them out and walking them round the corner for a school pick up. thank goodness she decided not to leave them unattended for even a couple of minutes

[theevildead2]

jock

Car could be stolen.

Child could overheat. (which where I am from is a sad and frequent enough occurence)

CHild could freeze to death.

The point is yes, you may think you are popping in for 5 mins but if something happens (emergency) 5 mins can turn in to a very long time and if no one knows you have a child in the car that could be deadly.

[theevildead2]

Jeez was just trying to find some statistics on children dying in cars when I found this article

here

Apparently half of the parents who lost their children this way forgot they had them in the car!

[researchinmotion]

Never mind forgetting them in the car theevildead2 .

I had a little girl lost christmas week and her mother had driven home without her. She rang about half an hour later asking if we had her.

Perhaps if she had left her in the car that wouldn't haven been so traumatic for the child

[theevildead2]

No! did you not notice she was still in the house?

[IWantToBeAFairyWhenIGrowUp]

I's sure I read a story in the UK about a woman that went to work and parked her car outside with her 2 year old in. When she went back he'd died because he'd overheated. She said she'd thought she'd already dropped him off at nursery or something. Effing nonsense, how can you FORGET your child?

OP - YANBU.

[BuzzLightBeer]

Its well documented that it happens, much more than you think. Its not "effing nonsense"

[Bramshott]

OP - YANBU - 15 mins is a long time.

However, everyone saying that it's never acceptable to leave your children alone in a car even for a second - please, get a grip.

Stapling your children to your side at all times is not the best way to ensure their safety. There are many scenarios where getting out of the car, crossing the road (probably with a parent carrying shopping, so no hands free) is much, much more dangerous than staying in the car.