Materialism - sick of it

[Smartieismycat]

Since OH was made redundant in October I've been in denial, which finally came to light when I checked my bank balance after New Year. I think I have had a denouement; realise that the things I thought could make me happy have not. NowI long to just pay my bills on time, pay the mortgage without worrying and occasionally go out to cinema/for a meal with OH and enjoy spending time with my DD.
However it's tough, likeI'm not allowed to just be happy with that. Even reading my favourite magazines -0 Grazia and Marie Claire - left me feeling hollow and empty.
I'm going to have to reconcile my feelings with what is around me. How do I do that?

I found that spending cash really helped me see that money was real, in a way that debit cards didn't. It cuts down my spending without me feeling deprived. I just tend to decide that a smoothie isn't worth £2 and I'd be equally happy with a glass of tap water.

YANBU OP. I spent over ten pounds in Costa coffee yesterday! OVER TEN POUNDS! DP and I have just put down a large deposit on our summer holiday and we have got to pay the rest by March so its austerity times in this house for a while. And Im looking forward to it! Went to Asda and because I have ben through my cupboards beforehand and know exactly what Ive got in, we spent more than £30 less than we usually do. And we arent going out AT ALL before our hols are paid for, so we are going to find ways of havin fun at home ;)

Im starting with cleaning out my cupboards.

ProfYaffle OH is into foraging, we have loads of blackberries in the fridge. I guess because I work in the city, I go back to work tomorrow after extending my Christmas break, I'm trying to bolster myself to facing it all again. x

Jodiesmummy OH is making menu plans so we have next 10 days of food sorted. Using leftovers this evening. Back at work tomorrow so am going to have to take in packed lunch. Although I do have £10 M&S credit notes (given by friend) that I could buy things - homous/bread etc- with and keep in office fridge for week. Hmmm - see my resolve going already

Quite agree with the hating of materialism. We used to go to Bluewater for fun and spend loads of money we didn't have. I hate going there now and the only bits I like are John Lewis and Yo Sushi. I sit there staring at the hoards of people buying the must have item with their credit cards that will run out one day......... Can you see that I have been there done that!

We now love bargain hunting with a passion and look at others we know and think that they are mad!

Yanbu, we have so much crap we don't actually need and many times, there is a cheap or free substitute.

Instead of buying books, get a library card
Instead of buying the paper, main headlines are on the web.
Instead of a brand, buy something cheaper.

There are many ways to economise, you just have to be a bit creative.

rampant materialism is part of why I moved out of the city to the country. our nearest shops are 30 mins drive away and everyone avoids them as much as possible. it's a real relief just to be away from it all. and most of the people round here feel similarly - just about everyone hates shopping. they much prefer walking/running/cyling.

I'd love to move out of the city - I'm sick to the back teeth of the materialism. I try not to buy into it, and say "no" to more request for stuff than I say yes to, but I still buy far more than I need and then find myself taking it to the recycling point to make way for new stuff. It's not right. I hate it.

trouble is, being skint and cutting right back can be new and exciting, seeing ways in which you can save money/don't buy what you don't need/do without/buy secondhand........when you've been doing nothing else for years and years it becomes depressing and a right pain in the arse

(sorry to burst anyone's bubble)

very true ssd - similarly making a choice to opt out (at least partially) - and having options open to you that help you do that is very different from having no choices

When we were really skint, I used to make it a shopping priority to find lovely things that were under £5 and posted them on a blog. It allowed me to go to all my favorite shops with an aim in mind, I was doing research (which I love), and sharing it with other people. Great fun, no money spent.

My favourite and cheapest thing is a trip to the library and then having lots of lovely free books to enjoy. I really think they are one of the best things in society. Also music. Really uplifting and distracting. Drop the mags and get the library books and tunes.

I agree ssd. If I won the lotto I would have no trouble coping with consumerism!

There is a difference between having to cut back and rejecting consumerism. One could have no worries re: mortgage and bills and buy nice food, but not get sucked in by materialistic wants. I often think that it is other people who do not want a person to reject a materialistic lifestyle because it is less fun for them. You know, friends won't go shopping, go for nights out, spend on lavish holidays, pay for travel to visit them.

Agree with lovelyopaque. Dh and I are not skint, we choose our lifestyle because it's what we enjoy. Being on the bones of your arse is a different matter entirely.

Am so glad I put up this thread, because it's also shown me that I'm not the only one who has problems reconciling the 21 century me with the one who wants to live a simple life.
Today I've lived a bit more cheaply, although I bought dinner in our work canteen (£2 for chips, salad and soup) so am making a small start. x

Go for it Smartie. I often feel the same way. It is hard though when surrounded by others who want to "sabotage"

Learn. Become a geek - they have the last laugh

Go to charity shops and pick up cheap books (some shops are much cheaper than others - I go to one where the books are never more than 50p)

Walk. Find out about the local buildings/landmarks/wildlife at the library (if Dave hasn't closed it) and enrich the walks.

Making finding out about freebies an enjoyable sport

Get a squirt of expensive scent at Boots before you go out

Join Love Films and do 'seasons' of genres, like Kitchen Sink dramas or those by a certain director

Beans on toast isn't as bad as you think!

The difficulty is when you don't have enough money for white goods or bare essentials. Not fun

If you have been a shopper in the past, become a seller : ) This past fall, using EBay and Kijiji I have sold off exercise equipment I don't use anymore, books I have finished with, electronics I no longer use, brides maid dresses that got worn once, and such, and cleared close to 300$.
The kids decided to sell their old game systems and games that they had "beaten" and raised another $300 for themselves. It is easy to set up, no one needs to know, you get more space in your house (yay more space) you are recycling and making the moolah! Then next time you see something you want to buy, take a quick photo of it. Check back in a month, and see if you still really want it. I was a sucker for impulse shopping, finding deals and stuff, when what I really needed to do was just slow down, and stop giving in to every temptation : )
It is a slow process, but it is worth it : )