To hope my baby will sleep better with formula?

[vinocollapso]

I know this is an emotive issue, and an age old one, but after almost 6 months of EBF, I need some advice about moving over to formula. I need to be sure I'm doing it for the right reasons.

DS wakes at night, generally every two hours. He is almost 6 months old. I don't care about this - babies wake up, they need you, I'm happy to comfort him.

But I'm tired. And worse than that I'm worried I'm encouraging a bad habit, that he's waking up because he knows he'll get a feed. I try and leave him a few minutes each time to see if he'll self-settle (sometimes he does), but 95% of the time it's boob and back to bed for him.

In the day he'll go 3 - 4 hours without eating, so he doesn't 'need' to eat at night. But you know how it is, you're tired at 2am and just want the fastest solution.

Should I throw in a bottle of formula now, and start to wean him off the boob? Will formula help him sleep longer? Or is the issue just that he's not settling? I feel that at 6 months I've done my best by EBF.

Any help or experience warmly received.

DD1 was like this. Some babies just don't sleep that well--I don't think formula would have made one bit of difference. Starting weaning helped a bit but she didn't sleep through for ages and at 4.5 still gets up some nights and wants cuddles. (Not often!)

On the other hand, I had some trouble feeding DD2. She was a good sleeper from birth but around 6 months started waking all the time. Wouldn't have solid food, I couldn't get my supply up so introduced some formula and in about 2 weeks she was sleeping through again.

My point is, if he's always been a restless sleeper, formula isn't likely to help. But if he is suddenly waking up hungry it might. Good luck with it, formula isn't poison and if you feel it will give you a break then go ahead and try it!

He'll be weaning very soon - maybe see how things are after a couple of weeks of having meals.

I didn't try formula but in my v. small sample size of 2 both started to wake much less frequently when I stopped breastfeeding in the night and either I or dh settled without feeding. pain in the arse for a few days as much harder to settle but then they stopped trying to feed when waking and then stopped waking gradually. Did this around 7 months with each. Def easier if your partner does it as it is very hard not to just feed them for a quick fix when knackered.

We give a ff just before bed for this reason, DD is bf the rest of the time. She does seem to sleep better after it, for about four hours, then she wants more milk. I resorted to this after lack of sleep brought back my migraines and, while I'd prefer ebf, I think it's a good compromise. Being a sleep deprived, exhausted mummy is not fun

When DD got to this stage, we started sending DH to settle her at night. He didn't smell of milk so she tended to settle back to sleep faster for him and didn't need the feed.

I think sometimes they just need to be resettled and then Mummy comes along smelling of delicious milk and they think "while I'm here..."

We tried formula for a while. Made no difference whatsoever so we went back to EBF. You could always try it and see what happens?

FF both of mine and they were both hopeless sleepers! Are you weaning yet? My youngest is 5 now so am not up to date on current weaning advice but why not talk to your hv about maybe something a little more filling later in the day? My 2 started to sleep much better after starting on solids.
Good luck xx

Haha,definitely agree with the smelling of milk thing, dh is much better at settling her then I am! (She says while feeding 5 mo old dd cause she won't relax for a much needed nap...)

Hmmm - I think I'd try weaning first then sleep training. EBF mixed with baby rice etc. Bottle feeding might fill his tummy but not as good as breast milk (speaking as someone who has used both). I entirely breastfed my eldest: she started waking every two hours for a feed from about 4 to 8 months, and we went for sleep training in the end. I agonised about it for weeks before we did it and had to sleep downstairs when we finally tried. My DH went to her every 15 mins or so and said "It's okay darling. Not time to get up yet". Took three nights. She's slept fine ever since (now 4). Had no qualms about sleep training the second one at 6 months. I had however started mixing in the odd bottle while he was at nursery from about 6 months, which I quite regret. He still needs a bottle of formula to go to sleep at nearly 3 and gave up BF at one year, while DD kept on till 2.
Good luck!

I dont think formula keeps them asleep longer than breast milk BUT I do think the difference is giving a bottle at the last feed before you go to bed vs breastfeeding.

I reckon it's because I generally have to wake DS for this feed, he's tired, so if I put him on the boob, he doesn't really do much, just has a few oz and drops off, whereas with the bottle of EBM he will take 5oz.

On the occasion I've given formula at that feed (if I've maybe had a few drinks or whatever) it hasn't made any difference to how long he sleeps so the difference for me is definitely the delivery method.

At about 10 weeks I also got tough on pre 3am wakings in that I would make myself try to resettle without feeding for at least 15 mins . It worked in 3 days. He switched to 4am earliest.

From my experience only, both my DCs slept longer when I introduce a formula feed a 10pm- I did this at about 4 months but carried in BFing for all other feeds.

However at nearly 6 months it is highly likely your baby is hungry for food. I would definitely star weening.

DW and I alternate nights with DS and on the nights I have him he doesn't get fed and still settles fine. Whereas when DW has him he can take 2 or 3 overnight feeds.

I think a big part of it is about DS knowing that it is 'available' and not really about hunger at all and if I'm there then he knows its not going to happen...

Having said that he's 20 months now and earlier on there were a number of times where he wouldn't settle for me without a feed (from DW!). So at 6 months he's probably too young to go all night without a feed yet - but he may not actually be hungry for all of the wakings.

If you have a partner and he can do some nights you will get a better picture of hungry wakings vs. other wakings.

Research shows that combination fed/ff babies are less likely to have sleep problems than ebf babies. Whether it will make a difference for your baby you won't know however till you try.

I found combination feeding did help massively.

Does your baby have reflux? That may explain the frequent waking, and treatment may help him sleep.

Research shows that combination fed/ff babies are less likely to have sleep problems than ebf babies. Whether it will make a difference for your baby you won't know however till you try.

I found combination feeding did help massively.

Does your baby have reflux? That may explain the frequent waking, and treatment may help him sleep.

People (like me only a few years ago) used to wean at around 4 months, it's now 6 months. I would crack on with weaning, and I don't personally see the big deal about introducing a bottle of formula if you want to, given that weaning means eating solid food, so why not formula? Lots of preprepared jars and so on have all kinds of milk products in them. By six/seven months, my two were eating quite a bit of baby rice, veggies, fruit, bread sticks and so on, that plus a hearty bottle (I also had a very low supply in the evening even after six months) meant I felt I could get the sleeping sorted without worrying they were hungry. I carried on breastfeeding though, in the days and it was always there as an option at night.

That's why I like around six months in, you have more options!

Have 3dc.
First was always v grouchy and didn't sleep at night. Started mixed feeding with idea it would calm things / give me a break. Didn't work. Finally slept through 10/11 months with me trying to get him to go longer between night feeds and trying to fob him off with water. Was a loooong slog though. Daytime calmed down around this time (think he was permanently over-tired).
Second very settled and decided to sleep through from 6 weeks. Ebfed until 17.5 months.
Third just like first but didn't ever start with bottles. ( I find them quite a faff.) Slept through 10/11 months after a (slightly less long/painful) stint of persuading her she maybe wasn't hungry and just wanted a cuddle/pat on the bum/nightshow/teddy .... Daytime clamed down around that time too. Ebfed until 17 months.

You know it's not all or nothing? You could always try giving a night time bottle of formula to see how he reacts. Then if it makes no difference you could go back to full breastfeeding again if that is what you want, or leave the evening feed as a bottle, or indeed switch over completely - whatever works best for your family.

Just wanted to add that the night time milks they sell often have added cereal which you may or may not agree with. You might know this already but I thought I'd mention it just in case.

Good luck, I hope he starts sleeping better soon!

Once weaning is underway and getting properly established, you might be able to night wean succesfully on the basis that though baby might be waking due to genuine hunger, if you can fob him off for just one or two nights, that hunger might rebound to give him a lovely big appetite for his solid food and he might then take to that rather well, thus eliminating the night eating.

Take the advice that sings to you and makes the most sense and I reckon by 8 or 9 months it will be pretty sorted.

Firstly, a great big thank you to everyone for taking the time to reply and share your experiences - this was exactly what I was after and it's really helped me to think it all through again.

We started weaning almost three weeks ago, and it's not made much difference tbh, he doesn't seem wildly excited about what I offer him. A bit here and there is what he'll have, and I'm trying not push it.I guess he'll get into the swing of that more once he's able to get more involved, I think. Still, we're doing two meals a day, and all additional calories, no matter how small, all help, right?

My instincts are to just keep going for a bit longer and see where we are at 7 months. He has a dummy and I always try to just cuddle and settle him if it's been less that three hours since he last fed. Though of course, this doesn't happen every time.

He's pretty good at self-settling, and he goes into his cot for his naps, so I'm quite pleased with that aspect.

I'm getting pressure from DP, that's the main issue, he feels we should be moving him on to formula, that it will solve all of the issues. He will not read or accept anything to the contrary. The big thing is that I can't trust DP to do the settling - he has a habit of doing weird and random things to get DS back to sleep (turning on the lights at 4am in case DS was frightened of the dark was the latest f* up) - he is not doing this to get out of it, he just seems to think it's ok to do this kind of thing! It's like he takes my advice and then runs in the opposite direction with it.

I actually tried a bottle of formula this morning, just to see if he'd take it. No, was the answer. And tbh, I just don't have the energy to embark on another new routine (new teats, different temperature, different whatever). I really, really don't want to go down the ff route yet, though I see no harm in the odd bottle, esp as I'll be going back to work in July. Provided he takes it, of course.

I'm glad people agree that I haven't started a bad habit, that was my worst fear.

Ultimately I just feel that I can only try my best, we'll get there in the end, and I'm so grateful to everyone for taking the time to share their thoughts. There's a little bit of good advice on every reply.

Apologies btw for posting this in the wrong place - that's sleep deprivation for you!

xxx

I think you need to step back and let dp do the settling, even if he does it "wrong" at first!

Is your Ds having protein at lunch? That is meant to help stop them waking in the night.

My DD was EFF and slept through from 5 weeks. My DNephew was EFF and still doesn't sleep through at 20 months old.

So, it's all down to the child I think as opposed to whether they are FF or BF so I don't suppose mixed feeding would make any difference.

What is going on with your DP? Who made him the god of all things baby related that he won't read or accept any advice? Does he choose to completely ignore that the world-wide health org recommend bf fir two years for good reason?! ( I am nit saying you should do that by the way, just that it is a recommendation by the organisation )

Yes six months is great but if you want tO carry on the benefits are enormous and help with all kinds of things like teething, colds etc

He needs to start change his attitude

My midwife told me that babies need feeding more often with breast milk as it is more easily absorbed by the babies stomach, whereas formula is a bit 'heavier' and fills them up for longer.

Don't know if she told me this as I was having a shit time breastfeeding, but it worked in my case.