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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

In being surprised that apparently 98% of UK women under 25 have no pubic hair at all?

849 replies

Longstocking2 · 04/01/2011 23:52

Is that true?

A friend who is a practice nurse says she presumes it's just a fashion. None of her women under 25 who come for smear tests have any pubic hair.. all shaved, shorn, waxed to nada.

Obviously that's fine but it seems a little universal to me. Aren't there any rebels out there?
Is it just for the boys they do it?

Does the image not come from porn originally?

{shock]
Confused
would love to be enlightened!
Clearly I'm over 25 Grin

OP posts:
ifancyashandy · 05/01/2011 12:55

Up your (hairy) bum Dittany. I do not need you to critique my committment to feminism as I am secure in my beliefs. I shave because sex feels great. The 'hips' comment was tongue in cheek Hmm

And SWC, your comment of:

Who on earth would do something as irrational as waxing their public hair "for themselves" unless they were completely bonkers? You may not be doing it for any particualr man, but that doesn;t mean you're doing it for yourself I again ask, what about gay women who are hair free? Both you and Dittany have conveniently ignored this point.

Also, why do you both want women to feel bad about taking care of their appearance? Do you not put any thought into the clothes you wear? Regardless of whether you care (and I am not saying you should) of what others think of your clothing / hair / nails, by putting any thought (be it 'I won't conform') you both know you are making a statement - just the same os those women who do want to be noticed by men / other women.

ifancyashandy · 05/01/2011 12:57

Oh, and if I don't reply for a while, it's not because I am unable to continue the debate, but because I'm off for a haircut. And a job interview as a project manager of 20 people and a budget of half a million.

Because looking (what I deem to be) good and using my brain are not mutually exclusive. Grin.

SnowyGonzalez · 05/01/2011 12:58

Yankees, yes re pits, as I said earlier. It makes armpits look like a child's. And I do shave my pits, though not fanatically. That doesn't preclude me from thinking bare muffs on women look weird. Have a read through the rest of the thread - there's something about beards, too.

sungirltan · 05/01/2011 12:59

ohhh. is there a specific appearance requirement to being a feminist.....ohhhhhhh (penny drops)

piprabbit · 05/01/2011 12:59

When I was growing up the boys would apply pressure to girls - 'If you love me then you will...'. But when the boys finally managed to get a look at a female body, they were bloody grateful most of the time. I don't think that the sort of magazines available in the early 80s, or playing a video (on the one and only player in the living room at home) gave many people much opportunity to get over-familiar with pornographic images.

Now they look at pictures, watch film at home, in their bedrooms, at school on their phones, very frequently. And being cocky little know-it-alls they think that they know how women look, how women behave and what turns women on. The pressure that is applied to girls now is that they must meet the boys' expectations, shave themselves, kiss other girls, have anal sex, enjoy rough sex. And if you don't conform - well that's where cyber bullying can be so effective.

I am very glad to be old - but genuinely scared for my DD's future.

piprabbit · 05/01/2011 13:01

(Oh, and the other girls are also pretty good at applying pressure to conform - especially if it makes them feel better about the choices they are tentatively starting to make in their own life).

TheFeministParent · 05/01/2011 13:03

As far as I remember legs, armpits are not cock attractions and are not solely for sexual attraction.

Libero · 05/01/2011 13:03

But a few people seem to be focused on the idea that it is solely to do with men/porn.

What I am saying is that there are a variety of reasons and I think their existence should be acknowledged, if not respected. Sensory usually (but not exclusively) has little to do with one's culture.

My frame of mind was - hey, there's stuff happening to my body. It's not unpleasant, but I'm not sure if I like it yet. Why don't I try changing it and see how it feels? There have been occasions where laziness has prevented me from depilating - in the main, I have not liked the way being hairy felt, so I generally choose not to be. However, there is no arguing that I am not a child anymore and never will be. That is certainly not what I believed I was trying to achieve and I do not think any differently now that I am older. I quite like being hairfree - my real hair has also mainly been and still is closely cropped (think a no.1 shave), but I doubt SnowyGonzalez, that you would say that that was due to wanting to remain in a baby-like/foetal state with little hair. It's just a personal preference. Dare I also say that a thread with a fixed number of MNetters (as influential as we think we are) is not a fully accurate representation of English/British culture as a whole?

People will like what they like and there are always a multitude of reasons to explain how they feel, and they are free to find people who are happy to agree with them. As a non-hair related example, an ex-boyfriend of mine preferred his girlfriends not to use deodorant as he preferred how they smelt naturally. I told him that using deodorant was a part of my personal grooming I was not willing to compromise, so he was free to stay with me on that basis or find someone else who thought the same as he did and/or would be happy to conform. Some might have called him a freak (and I would concede that he probably could be defined as "different", in more ways than one Wink), but I would never call him a freak because he was entitled to think the way he did, as long as it was not to another person's detriment.

Depilating doesn't hurt anyone other than oneself. It may change the general consensus on what people think is acceptable or the norm, but not everyone follows or has to follow fashion, be that general or alternative. If I were to have a daughter, I would raise her to know that there are several options out there and, like her mother, she may do with her body as she pleases. If she wants to conform to an ideal that she feels she is forced to by society, I will always let her know that she has a choice and that choice is hers alone.

I'm just surprised that hair elicits such a strong reaction from people - it's only hair. Why care to label negatively how someone chooses to keep it and the reasons behind that?

KerryMumbles · 05/01/2011 13:05

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ifancyashandy · 05/01/2011 13:06

ohhh. is there a specific appearance requirement to being a feminist.....ohhhhhhh (penny drops)

Well, it seems to be you can't be hair free and a feminist....

KerryMumbles · 05/01/2011 13:06

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Tortington · 05/01/2011 13:09

what reason? plaiting?

i had a minge afro that would have put the jackson 5 to shame.

dittany · 05/01/2011 13:11

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KerryMumbles · 05/01/2011 13:13

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nurseblade · 05/01/2011 13:17

"Which is why we've heard about a litany of men on this thread who suggested it to their partners"

I posted about my experience of the opposite. My man wants me to grow my bush back. I've compromised and gone for a brazilian rather than a hollywood, but I still prefer a hollywood.

TheFeministParent · 05/01/2011 13:18

How on earth is sex better without any hair....have had all sorts of ways btw...

emmyloulou · 05/01/2011 13:20

Extreme feminism and excuse for other women to bully and patronise other women about their choices.

Women ordering saying how other women should feel, why the feel it and what they should be doing with their personal grooming.

Don't you just love the irony.

QueenofAllWildThings · 05/01/2011 13:22

just adding my 2p - I'm 36, shave armpits when I get a chance (say, 2x a week?), shave legs less often in the winter (!) and trim the lady-garden when it threatens to block out the sun. Am quite 'abundant' in that area so can imagine waxing would REALLY HURT! Occasionally pluck out a few stragglers at the sides, but use nail scissors on the rest... cannot imagine getting rid of it all, seems weird to me, but each to their own.

dittany · 05/01/2011 13:22

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dittany · 05/01/2011 13:23

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smallwhitecat · 05/01/2011 13:24

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dittany · 05/01/2011 13:25

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CatIsSleepy · 05/01/2011 13:27

i am well over 25 and generously endowed in the pubes department

i like them
i don't think I'd like the look of myself bald down there, it would be seriously freaky

don't get the obsession with ripping out pubes

TheFeministParent · 05/01/2011 13:28

Bully and patronise? Really? It's called disagreeing, a grown up disagreement with adults and whether they are feminists or not has naff all to do with it.

It is factual wrong to say that women's appearance isn't shaped by men, men in porn, men in fashion and men in our own homes. Shaving your legs, dying your hair, slapping on the slap, breast implants, arse bleaching are all things that women do predominantly. To deny this is stupid, but to assert that shaving an armpit (which is a generation old at least) is the same as the new shaven haven is ridiculous. The free hardcore porn available at little or no effort and the rise of the lads mags is a little to coincidental for me to think one has nothing to do with the other.

CatIsSleepy · 05/01/2011 13:28

pretty soon blokes are going to faint at the sight of a decent muff