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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to have never owned a baby monitor nor a thermometer?

78 replies

TheLogLadyMBE · 04/01/2011 17:04

monitor - don't get it. either a baby is close enough for you to hear or you'd rather not hear at all.

thermometer - if a baby/child has a temperature it's fairly obvious.

AIBU?

OP posts:
classydiva · 04/01/2011 17:41

didnt have a thermometer until a few years ago, my kids are 22 and 17.

Even when my eldest had febrile convulsions at the age of 1 never had one, you can tell when a baby or child is hot.

Never has a monitor either, baby always with me when young.

clayre · 04/01/2011 17:42

I only used the baby monitors when we moved to a house from a flat so I could hear them playing upstairs Blush

Carrie06 · 04/01/2011 17:43

I've found both of these two of the most useful baby items I own. We don't have a big house but we have a coldish house so don't like sitting with doors open. In saying that sometimes if we are sitting watching tv with volume up, you would miss a quiet and possibly significant noise on the monitor unless you had it to your ear. Ours also had visual indicators but again, if you weren't looking at it, you might miss those too. Nothing replaces going to check on your child periodically. Ear Thermometer - am rubbish at knowing if DS has a temp. Great to have. I don't think yabu not to have one - each to their own but I'd recommend them based on my own experience. Both were gifts in my case.

anonandlikeit · 04/01/2011 17:44

ds1 didn't have either. Ds2 was sent home from hospital on various monitors/alarms so we did use a baby monitor with him.
Also used an underarm thermometer for ds2 as a baby but nothing since he has been old enough to wriggle!
YANBU but each to their own!

JarethTheGoblinKing · 04/01/2011 17:45

We still use a montitor, DS is 3yo!

We have good reason though - we genuinely can't hear him from downstairs if the TV and/or washing machine is on, and we sleep on a different floor to him so wouldn't be able to hear him at night either.

sarah293 · 04/01/2011 17:46

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backwardpossom · 04/01/2011 17:47

I've not bothered with either, but I can understand why people do.

GetOrfMoiLand · 04/01/2011 17:48

"I don't actually know what the normal number is supposed to be"

Lol, I am the same. It's under 40, innit? Grin

Christ it is a miracle dd is still alive, evidently!

pickyourbattles · 04/01/2011 17:49

We use a monitor in the evenings when the boys are in bed. Not at night cos we're across the corridor from them and could hear everything.

Hilarious to think I would actually be a better mother if I kept my exhausted boys downstairs with me until I went to bed just to avoid the heinous crime of using a monitor Hmm.

otchayaniye · 04/01/2011 17:51

Whoah, you crazy, living-on-the-edge mother!

But yes, I haven't had either. Or a pram or stroller. Or a cot. I do have a baby, honestly

EdgarAleNPie · 04/01/2011 17:53

monitor unnecessary - my kids are healthy and whilst tiny were in our room anyway.

sadly a child quietly perishing is unlikely to be picked up by a standard monitor.

thermometer is useful - you can tell th difference between 'hot' and 'even hotter, A&E quicksmart' for definite. telling temperature relative to your own body temp is not a good indicator of this.

missismonky · 04/01/2011 18:05

I'm worried, the only reference to 'bad mother' I could find on this thread was mine. I wasn't being serious. I most certainly would never say that Riven was a bad anything! I apologise if anyone was offended by my post Sad

PrincessScrumpy · 04/01/2011 18:05

I bought an ear thermometer when dd had slapped cheek at 20 months and NHS direct wanted to know her temp. Has been useful for when dd (now 2.10) tries it on with the "I'm poorly mummy".

Monitor - yes, we have a 3-storey townhouse and couldn't hear her in her bedroom when we were asleep upstairs - dd liked to have her door shut and they are fire doors. Also my parents house is big so couldn't hear her when we stayed over.

Can understand not having a monitor though. Our first one was hopeless as we live in a bad signal area.

sarah293 · 04/01/2011 18:08

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ragged · 04/01/2011 18:31

Not a bad mother to have them, but not a bad mother to not have them, either... iyswim. A baby/tot with unacceptably high temp manifests it in a great many ways, I've found.

All the times I've phoned NHS direct about DC and it never seemed an issue that I didn't know exactly what DC temp was. I guess they're trained to deal with all sorts of nutjobs. Grin

I would have struggled to manage without a pram, though; I'd put that right near the top of my Essential equipment list, only below correct size clothes and nappies, I suppose.

stLucia · 04/01/2011 18:42

My DDs are teenagers and I've never owned a thermometer.

However, we do have some funny paper strips that you stick to the forehead.
DD2 will stick her head on the radiator in the morning and say "Mum, look, proper ill me, Mum. Swine flu, I reckon. I'll just get back in bed."
I had her twigged after the second time though! :o not too shabby.

lucky1979 · 04/01/2011 18:45

I had video monitor until DD was about 7 months, presumably that makes me an even worse mother?

It made me a considerably less stressed mother though (PFB) as I didn't have to run upstairs every 5 mins to check she was still alive for the first few weeks.

bubbleymummy · 04/01/2011 18:51

We bought a monitor for DS1 but we hardly used it because he was always in the room with us when he was small!

We also have an ear thermometer but I can tell if they have a fever by doing the 'kiss test' on their forehead. TBH I think some people can get a bit too tied up with the numbers on the thermometer. If they have a fever, they have a fever - it's more important to look at how the child is acting/responding rather than what the numbers are.

TattyDevine · 04/01/2011 18:53

With the monitor thing, fine, but they have their uses. I have used ours very little at home in the normal routine, yet when I go and stay at in-laws etc for Christmas I'd be lost without it. As a general use, at home, in my house, I dont have a great use for it but it comes into its own when visiting different houses with diffferent sleeping arrangements.

I'm not big on thermometers really either, though I recently bought a bog standard digital oral jobby as I was having to report back to my GP if my temp spiked as I am dying of manflu really suffering with bronchitis and on antibiotics.

So yeah, all great in theory if you dont visit people with weird 3 storey houses and 21 rooms and if you never ring the NHS direct who will ask you what your child's temp is and if you can't tell them it generates an email to social services to get them placed ASAP with someone not quite so mind-bogglingly lax Grin

TheOldestCat · 04/01/2011 19:01

Same as TattyDevine, we really only use the monitor when at the in-laws' etc.

But I got roundly told off at our local minor injuries unit when I took DS in (turns out he had bronchiolitis) and the nurse noticed DD as poorly too. I thought she just felt 'a bit hot'; turns out her temp was 40.6.

I have now bought an ear thermometer.

Tysonandthehouseelves86 · 04/01/2011 19:01

I cant hear dd in front room, its only a 3 bed council house and she cries very loudly! I havent got a monitor as cant afford one, i sold ds monitor as didnt think id have more children. Thermometers are important though, even if for the reason of not wasting the doctors time, i would of took ds into the emergency docs alot of times if it werent for my thermometer. :)

octopusinabox · 04/01/2011 19:02

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Message withdrawn at poster's request.

midori1999 · 04/01/2011 19:15

YABU, I never used or owned wither. My DC seem to have survived/be suviving so I can't be that much of a bad mother.

If otherpeople want to have them/get comfort from them, that's fine of course.

ToysRLuv · 04/01/2011 19:19

We have a smallish 3 bed flat, but use a monitor when DS has gone to bed and we're watching telly and when we sleep, although are not far from his room. I'd rather hear him before he goes into a full blown scream, and want to be sure I'll wake up even if I'm dead tired (or the washing machine has gone into the loud cycle). PFB or whatever, I would just call it being sensible. Also, during autumn, when I was doing a bit of gardening, the monitor was absolutely essential.

I have a thermometer, as well. Just in case. The ear thermometer seems a bit unreliable, though (different figures from different ears etc.). Also, agree with forehead strip monitor being useless.

I used to fool my mum by holding a armpit thermometer to a hot lamp while she was out of the room. Only used this trick once or twice, though. Don't know why Grin

ragged · 05/01/2011 08:16

No no, it's not bad to have these things (although I think the video monitor might be a bit OTT), just saying that you can get along fine without them.

OldestCat: I went to hospital with a temp of 40.9. "Oh, is that high?" I asked (as if the doctors and nurses flurrying around wasn't a clue Blush). But I felt so bad I damn well knew I was very ill, I didn't need to know any numbers to figure that part out; after Out-of-Hours GP (who knew my temp) nearly sent me back home with only anti-sickness drugs; I was then in hospital for 5 days, on IV fluids & antibiotics.