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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to think electric guitars aren't acceptable at any time of day in a house with shared walls

116 replies

tyler80 · 02/01/2011 16:04

One of our next door neighbours (semi) seems to have recently acquired an electric guitar & amp.

It's loud enough in our house that we cannot say watch a dvd whilst they're playing. I've been round a couple of times and to be fair they've always immediately turned it off/right down. But would I be unreasonable to tell them it's not acceptable to us at any time to play it that loudly and I shouldn't have to go round each time to tell them this?

OP posts:

GreenButton · 02/01/2011 16:06

Kindly suggest that they use a pair of headphones plugged into the appropriate amp socket.

scurryfunge · 02/01/2011 16:07

Can you suggest that they use it with headphones?

Get them to also come round and hear exactly what the level of noise is like.

TheBrandyButterflyEffect · 02/01/2011 16:09

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MissQue · 02/01/2011 16:11

I think it's great that they are considerate enough to turn the volume down on request, but they have every right to have loud times as much as anyone else. My ds plays loud music and his guitar during the day, but not at night, for obvious reasons, and it doesn't bother me in the least, nor have I had any feedback from neighbours that it's annoying them.

Perhaps you could have a chat with the neighbour and agree on a compromise, that he keeps it down, for instance, after the time your kids go to bed?

TmiEdward · 02/01/2011 16:15

Our neighbour has an electric guitar & amp. He plays it about 9pm or later a few times a month. We can hear it over the TV, but thankfully he doesn't wake our children.

I don't/can't complain becuase I'm sure my DC make similar levels of noise at 7am. Neighbour has even nicknamed DS1 "Thunderfoot" for the delicate way he travels down the stairs.

Both households make noise. We share a wall. We just get on with it.

ilovemydogandMrObama · 02/01/2011 16:18

Yeah, I think you're BU to suggest that a neighbor can't enjoy playing their own guitar in their own house. Fair enough if they are playing it late and keeps your baby/kids awake, but suggesting that he shouldn't play it plugged into the amp ever?

DH used to be in a band and they would practice in a warehouse, but sometimes he would practice at home. No one complained and now next door has a loud dog

TattyDevine · 02/01/2011 16:21

They are allowed to play it - its not only people with detached houses or castles who can learn to play the electric guitar.

They are being unreasonable if they dont listen to you a bit though and of course the level of volume is controlled by them - an electric guitar is incredibly quiet until you plug it in, and then the volume can be right down.

They ANBU to want to crank it up a bit sometimes in reasonable hours though.

Bit of give and take. I feel for you though.

Original poster

tyler80 · 02/01/2011 16:27

I know I should be glad that they turn it down when asked but tbh I think it's really rude to make enough noise that we have to complain repeatedly.

There are ways to play without disturbing anyone, headphones for example, so I guess I don't see why they can't do that.

OP posts:

TheLittleRaccoon · 02/01/2011 16:33

I think it's incredibly rude and inconsiderate to EVER play it loud enough for you to hear, especially since it's perfectly possible to use headphones and make no noise at all.

I just don't get people who say "everyone's got the right to have loud parties/play loud music" etc. Sure, if you live in a detached house or whatever but if you've got walls attached, then it's rude to inflict anything but the most essential noise on other people.

Babies crying, DIY noise (at reasonable times) fair enough - but I'd be going round and telling him in no uncertain terms that HE may well be thrilled with his new toy, but you don't want to hear it, TYVM.

YANBU.

LoveBeingADaddysGirl · 02/01/2011 16:36

Our neighbour sings with a microphone and guitar plus sometimes his amp. There is only one room in the house that isn't joined to his house so you can hear it everywhere. If does sometimes get me down, ESP that it wasn't mentioned when we bought the house. We get in quite well though and he alomst never ays after 9pm, if he does j go round. Mind you I can hear him when he's on the phone as well.

Original poster

tyler80 · 02/01/2011 16:39

I could accept hearing it, after all I can hear them scrape their dinner plates. But to not be able to do things like watch a dvd or have a phone conversation just seems too much.

OP posts:

PlanetEarth · 02/01/2011 16:41

If you can't hear your own dvd's then yes, the neighbour is unreasonable and should use headphones. Are there times when you're regularly all out? (kids at school, you at work). Maybe you could suggest the neighbour confines non-headphone playing to these times.

mamatomany · 02/01/2011 16:41

Our previous neighbours were deaf as posts and had the TV on full blast, the truth is there's little you can do these days without ruining your chances of selling your house because all complaints are recorded and available to potential purchasers.
You probably have got to go around every day and complain until they get fed up of seeing you and behave themselves.

mayorquimby · 02/01/2011 16:45

"Babies crying, DIY noise (at reasonable times) fair enough"
but why if
"I think it's incredibly rude and inconsiderate to EVER play it loud enough for you to hear,"

The effect on the neighbour is still the same, they hear something not of their making and are slightly disturbed. I don't see how one persons noise trumps another because of the value judgment they put on it.

Original poster

tyler80 · 02/01/2011 16:46

Our house is rented, as is our neighbours (same landlord)

OP posts:

mamatomany · 02/01/2011 16:48

Our house is rented, as is our neighbours (same landlord)

Thank heavens for small mercy's at least one of you will eventually move.

Original poster

tyler80 · 02/01/2011 16:50

I was kind of hoping they would only be there for 6 months, they only moved in in November, but they just had sky installed so looks like they intend to be there a bit longer.

We're tempted to move ourselves, but it's a huge expense and with no guarantee you'll not just end up somewhere with a similar problem.

OP posts:

TheLittleRaccoon · 02/01/2011 16:53

Babies cry. It can't be helped. Most people realise that and make allowances.

If you don't do a certain amount of DIY, your house falls down.

There is no NEED to play music loud enough for neighbours to hear. Especially if it's possible to use headphones. I can't understand how anyone can put their own "right" to listen to loud music above a neighbour's right to peace and quiet.

But then I can take or leave music. Perhaps hardened music lovers can explain why it's necessary to have it turned up loud enough for the neighbours to hear?

trixie123 · 02/01/2011 18:50

DP plays electric guitar and will usually use headphones or just play unplugged but actually you do need to be able to really hear the sound through the amp occasionally if you are going to be prepared to play with a band on stage. Very few of us have the luxury of a detached house and a bit of give and take is really not that much to ask, provided the noise is not after a certain time which perhaps you could agree to? Problem is, it doesn't have to be THAT loud for sound to travel through walls in many houses - we can hear our neighbours if they slightly rise their voices at each other or laugh loudly - I'm not going to go and tell them not to speak!

katiestar · 02/01/2011 18:57

YABU, as long as they are not doing it all day or in the middle of the night.

Original poster

tyler80 · 02/01/2011 18:57

There's a difference between hearing noises and not being able to hear anything but.

I expect I might be more inclined to let it go if I didn't have to listen to the huge arguments that go on day in day out, f this and f that and the yappy little dog that likes to bark constantly for hours at a time. I put up with these as I can turn some music on myself and drown it out somewhat, not so with the guitar.

OP posts:

katiestar · 02/01/2011 18:58

You wouldn't like to live next door to us
2 electric guitars
1 bass guitar
drumkit
keyboard
trumpet
saxophone
2 violins

all played daily

ZZZenAgain · 02/01/2011 19:02

I don't think YABU, would probably drive most people mad if they actually had to hear it. Thankfully I never have but friends of ours lived in a flat with a guy downstairs from there who practised drums at home.

They moved in the end

I suppose it could be worse - they could refuse to turn down the amplifier or play through the night etc

ZZZenAgain · 02/01/2011 19:06

I can be tolerant about it at a distance. It is easy enough to think oh, a bit of give and take etc but in reality if it were me having to put up with it, I don't think I really would feel like that.

If you cannot get them to always keep the amplfier down to a level you find bearable, maybe you need to speak to the landlord?

Original poster

tyler80 · 02/01/2011 19:07

Yes it could be worse. Lived in a shared house for a while where the guy in the room above used to like to play the bongos pretty much all through the night.

OP posts:

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