to pull up PIL's friends for racist (religionist?) story?

[AnnieLobeseder]

We're staying at the PIL's at the moment, and they're having some friends over today. One of PIL's friends was telling a 'hilarious' story about how he and some work mates nearly got a Muslim to eat a pork sausage until "some sod" told him it was pork and ruined the 'joke'.

I said I didn't think that was funny at all, and people like that who think it's funny to make Muslims eat pork or vegetarian eat meat (I'm veggie) are actually being pretty shitty (worded it better though).

Of course they conversation then turned to how pretty much all Muslims eat pork and drink alcohol when they're not in public anyway etc etc etc... very bigoted people.

My brother was shooting me daggers for pointing out the nastiness of this guest's views, but frankly, I'd rather be unpopular than just suck it up and abandon my views.

So, was IBU?

I don't know, the guy got as far as "he put ketchup on his bun, put the sausage in, put the onions in, and was about to take a bite when some sod told him it was pork!" Cue laughs all around and me saying it wasn't funny.

I think you shouldnt have made a 'scene' , you should have instead fed Mr Comedian something he would find truely disgusting, something worthy of a bushtucker trial and then asked how he felt about the 'joke'

But then I'm biased and get peeved explaining that yes i really dont want to eat gelatine, however processed it may be and unlike the original form or that as cochineal is made from beetles i avoid it even though "it will be just a tiny amount" in a cake or sweet

Indeed. Amazing how many people don't know cochineal is made from beetles. I mean, would most of the mums on here feed Tarquin those Jungle yoghurts if they knew there were beetles in them? Well, they probably don't buy them anyway cos I think they're made by Nestle.

Even more amazing is how many people don't know what gelatine is made of and that Haribo is full of it!

Anyway, ccpccp doesn't seem to want to fight any more so I really will go to bed.

Night Annie

I love beetle juice. I also love Nestles chocolate.

"FFS, were you there?"

No. Were you?

Its never as clear cut as it seems.

How the hell do you know what was acceptable behaviour between the story teller and his work collegues? How many of them do you know?

The fact is - the story struck a nerve with you because people have done the same with respect to your vegetarianism. This has so little to do with racism its barely worth mentioning.

"So because there were no Muslims present it was ok to laugh at their expense?"

No-one laughed at 'muslims' expense did they? One guy, a collegue of the storyteller, had a practical joke played on him. He was probably laughing about it in the pub later as he sunk a pint of beer with his bacon crisps.

Ah, poor ccpccp, living in a world where prejudice can be so easily brushed aside. May you never find yourself part of a minority group (though I'll be the first to admit I'm making assumptions about you here).

What actually happened at the barbecue in question is beside the point. Perhaps the guy in question did find it funny. That never formed part of the story relayed to us.

What's not funny, and what is entirely the point, is that the person telling the story was attempting to get the other guests at this party to laugh at how a Muslim once nearly unknowingly ate pork, and that the person who stopped him was "a sod" rather than a kind, thoughtful person.

Please tell me how this is acceptable? Seriously. I'm dying to know.

And I'm still waiting for an explanation of your "as usual" comment.

I can't see how it was anything but laughing at a muslims expense.

The man in question was Muslim, the work colleagues were tricking him into doing something unacceptable to his Muslim beliefs, and then when retelling the story a group of people were regaling about a Muslim man being tricked into doing something non- Muslim.

How can that not be laughing at Muslims expense.

Incidentally there is no bacon in bacon crisps. And I believe you can get non alcoholic lager.

So racism/religious prejudice is ok if the 'obvious offended party' isn't present?

In that case I should have kept my mouth shut when last year my FIL, while reading a children's book to DS and his cousin, pointed out the little smiling black girl and said, 'she's smiling because she's on the social' and then SIL pointed out the little while boy (who was frowning) and said 'he's upset because he doesn't want to stand next to her'. We are all white, so by some people's bizarre logic, there is no 'obvious offended party'.

It would have been fucking cowardly and ridiculous NOT to say anything. I don't appreciate ANYONE expecting me to be complicit in their racism, and I certainly won't allow it to be broadcast around DS without confronting it.

Quick hijack of own thread to wave at YanknCock. Haven't seen you on here since the Christmas jolly!

Hiya! I've been around here a bit, but I don't venture into AIBU that much. I just posted after you on another thread but I swear I'm not stalking you. Now come on over and sit down

ccp - that kind of attitude is why there have been so many civil rights fights over the years.

It is never okay to play a practical joke on someone like that - The people playing the joke knew that they were muslim, and that muslims are forbidden to eat pork.
Regardless of what the muslim's probable attitude to the meat - unless that muslim had said the the joker "i do eat pork", then the joker was not being "funny" to play that joke.

It's not fair or right to force somebody to go against their religious beliefs - especially when you know something they don't.

how can you even think that it is?

Casual racism/religious intolerance is so much worse, sometimes, than the obvious stuff, because it creates an undercurrent that it's somehow okay to think these thoughts and discriminate.

"Ah, poor ccpccp, living in a world where prejudice can be so easily brushed aside."

I'm afraid its your moral compass thats misaligned here AnnieLobeseder. You are seeing racism everywhere. Everyone is a bigot.

Man who doesnt eat pork is tricked into nearly eating pork by insensitive workmate.

Unless of course the guy was being abusive towards muslims when he was recounting his story? Is this AIBU by stealth?

No of course it isnt, because had he been verbally abusive you'd have it typed up in the OP, word for word. Underlined.

I'd have been fuming if someone tricked me into eating meat. I will tiredly go along with people joking about slipping alcohol into my water, or going, "I'm going to get you drunk one day, haha!" [Yeah, you and about forty others, so far my will has been strong enough to do what I want and not what you want] because that is at worst boring to me. If someone actually did do that, I'd cut them off.

I wonder how people thinking stuff like this is funny, or even that stuff like accidentally making mashed potato with normal milk and butter and then telling a vegan it's been with soya milk and vegan spread because, "They won't know the difference," is okay, would feel if someone set it up and tricked them into doing something they felt strongly against. Like maybe hitting a child? Or having sex with a family member? Or smashing up someone's prized antique furniture? All possible, but I bet their response wouldn't be, "Well, haha, it was only a joke."

OP, you weren't at all unreasonable. Who cares whose house it is? Even if it made everybody uncomfortable, you wouldn't be the one in the wrong for pointing out their cruel idea of a joke, they would be the ones in the wrong for doing it in the first place. And hopefully having been told that, they might start to think about not being so bloody selfish next time [getting your kicks by making someone else go against their beliefs is insanely selfish].

ccpccp - sorry, I fail to see how your latest post advances your POV. You said "Man who doesnt eat pork is tricked into nearly eating pork by insensitive workmate". Yes, this is what happened, and what I and most people on here think is unacceptable. I fail to see how it is acceptable. Perhaps you could word it another way. What is worse however, is that the guest at this party though the 'trick' was funny and worth repeating in company, and expected us to as well. Do you find it funny?

And I'm very confused about the AIBU by steath comment.

I also think you must have me mixed up with someone else, because ASAIR this is the first time I've ever posted about racism. Luckily I really don't see it everywhere. That's why this occurrence was so shocking to me - it's been years since I've encountered it at all, thank goodness.

sorry, the ASAIR should be AFAIR - as far as I remember.

He didn't eat pork because of his religious beliefs!

In some countries they could be reported for hate crimes. The colleagues were knowingly being disrespectful of his religious belief that to eat Haram foods goes against the ways of Islam..

Then the guy relates it as an hysterical story to a gathering. They weren't shocked or discussing how awful it was, they saw it as an amusing anecdote.

Would it have been amusing if he had said "dog faeces in a pitta bread, a baby's arm in a baguette, or a lepers arse cheek in a bap! No, they would have been horrified.

He had no respect for this mans core beliefs and they abused it, and then stood round laughing.

Disgusting and well done op by the way.

Good for you OP.

I thought that the perception of gunpowder cartridges wrapped in pork / beef oiled paper was the basis of the Sepoy mutiny, leading to thousands upon thousands of hideous deaths in India. It is not a joke. It is deeply offensive to get someone to unwittingly consume something they are morally and religiously opposed to.

It follows that it is also deeply offensive to convey this as a funny joke.