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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To be cross/worried about my parents going out in the snow

30 replies

DoNotWantAnotherMincePie · 18/12/2010 10:38

My mum just called me (to ask if my son would like something she has seen) and said she is in Brent X with my dad. We are predicted up to 25cm of snow today and they are out Xmas Shopping (it is already snowing)!! They are 65 yrs old and live 8 miles away from Brent X - which can take an hour at the best of times due to traffic.

AIBU to be cross at them for going?

OP posts:

twilight3 · 18/12/2010 10:44

YABVU. 65 is not that old, and unless your parenst are completely stupid they had all the info and made a choice to go shopping. What's your beef? And why does snow puts everyone in this country in a state of panic? Yeah, they might be in the car a looong time, or at worst they'll walk in the snow.

what's important is that it's up to them. I don't get you

HarderToKidnap · 18/12/2010 10:44

YABU. They are grown-ups for G-ds sake. The A406 will be well gritted. Stop policing other adults, that isn't your job.

Goblinchild · 18/12/2010 10:45

It's a bugger when old people refuse to be old and sensible isn't it?
My mother has a habit of looking over her glasses at me when I'm fussing and then doing just as she pleases.

backwardpossom · 18/12/2010 10:46

I can understand why you might be worried, but YABU - they're adults and they'll make their own decisions. Presumably they know the forecast, too?

foxinsocks · 18/12/2010 10:47

Lol

I can understand why you are worried but the main roads, ie the bus routes, have been gritted really well it seems.

I think some people are just worriers and maybe you are one of them :-). Nothing wrong with caring but don't get cross.

Aims80 · 18/12/2010 10:49

Ha can just imagine what my parents would say if I told them not to go out in snow.. I think some swear words would be involved.. they're out shopping now and are early 60's.

I assume yours are not frail and doddery? Don't worry!

herbietea · 18/12/2010 10:50

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Original poster

DoNotWantAnotherMincePie · 18/12/2010 10:57

Ha !! Ok maybe I wont stay cross but I am worried. They do not live on a main road and are a bit doddery. Wouldn't surprise me if they hadn't looked at the weather reports.

OP posts:

TooPragmatic · 18/12/2010 10:59

YABU. Well done to them for getting on with things and not letting a bit of snow stop all activity!

hairyfairylights · 18/12/2010 11:01

Yabvu. Uour folks are young and they have not got to 65 without being able to make their own judgments surely!!

Original poster

DoNotWantAnotherMincePie · 18/12/2010 11:06

ok ok OK !!! I get it. I am only worried because it took me 2 hours to drive 4 miles yesterday with a tiny bit of snow. Lets just hope they don't take 7 hours to get home. Just thought the advice was unless a journey is essential - to stay at home.

OP posts:

classydiva · 18/12/2010 11:09

65 is not old. They are adults am sure they be fine.

taintedsnow · 18/12/2010 11:10

I think YANBU to worry, I would be too, but YABabitU to be cross with them.

I'd be feeling the same as you though, unreasonable or not!

JeezyPeeps · 18/12/2010 11:10

YANBU to be concerned. YABU to be cross! They are, after all, old enough to have seen snow before, and make their own decisions about their safety...

FattyArbuckel · 18/12/2010 11:11

YABU and frankly disrespectful to be cross with them!

Goblinchild · 18/12/2010 11:12

I think the OP has got the idea and realised that she needs a bit of common sense.

Flisspaps · 18/12/2010 11:16

If it takes them 7 hours to get home, then it takes them 7 hours to get home - they'll be in a nice warm car or bus. Are they supposed to sit in the house because you have decided they are too old and 'doddery'?

Of course, if they're cycling there then you may have a point.

suzikettles · 18/12/2010 11:55

My mum met one of her neighbours (80 if she is a day) struggling up the road, knee deep in snow during their bad patch and went over to ask her if she could help her home and get whatever she wanted from the shops for her.

Neighbour said that she was going stir crazy indoors and just needed to get out - she was sick of being safe and sensible. So my mum walked up to the shops with her and saw her home again, absolutely exhausted but feeling that she'd at least done something with her day.

Yes, she might have fallen and worst case scenario she might have died just to get to the shops, but she's still her own person and these are her decisions to make.

I really think that not considering your age and just doing what you've always done (within reason!)helps keeps people in better mental and physical health - albeit that on rare occasions something bad might happen.

(Btw my parents are in their mid-60s and I just can't think of them as old - I think that's because my grandmother was still hillwalking in her 80s and breaking the ice in the burn to get water in this sort of weather )

Caboodle · 18/12/2010 12:02

YANBU to worry, especially if they get stuck and you have to go and rescue them. Perhaps a little bit U for being cross, but I assume this is just a result of you worrying.

LisaD1 · 18/12/2010 12:09

My parents are in their early 60's and dad drove from Surrey to Edinburgh in the last lot of bad snow! No matter how much we didn't want him to. They are adults and entitled to make their own judgement re the weather.

I understand you being concerned but not the being cross.

verytellytubby · 18/12/2010 12:14

A perfect day for Brent Cross as it's bound to be quiet

They might not be aware when they are in there that it's a blizzard now (I live a few miles from there).

BiscuitNibbler · 18/12/2010 13:43

According to the BBC Brent Cross has closed due to heavy snow, so they should be on their way home now.

Original poster

DoNotWantAnotherMincePie · 18/12/2010 14:07

We have about 4/5 inches of snow now and doesn't look like it is going to let up! I am a few miles from my parents. I cant get hold of either of them now and a severe weather warning has been issued.

OP posts:

MayDayChild · 18/12/2010 14:09

Not I believe, I think they are irresponsible for going out. Brent x now closed.
Lakeside and all surrounding roads jammed.
Doh! Should have stated at home.

BelligerentYhoULE · 18/12/2010 14:14

TABU - they are only 65 so hardly ancient! Severe weather warnings are issued for just a bit of snow in Britain. It always amazes me how Britain panics and almost grinds to a halt each year and it always amazes me how much fuss people make about it all.

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