If you say you are picking up at latest at 6.30 - don't pick your children up at 6.45

[swanriver]

I offered to look after a friend's two kids after school so that she could go take her eldest child somewhere and go onto to non-workrelated meeting. Not quite a playdate, but a nice chance to do her a favour, and my kids enjoy the company. She said she would pick up at 6.30 at verylatest because she needed to go on somewhere else in good time. I had her two children fed, coated, shod, and ready for 6.30 in the hall, to make life easier for her. Then she doesn't arrive. Not for any particular reason. She doesn't ring to warn me she is running late, say at 6pm. At the worst possible time of day I have to stand in hall with her anxious children, whilst my children are running amok and need to wind down, and she waltzes in 15 mins later
AIBU that you should not have to keep other people's kids past 6.15 or 6.30 unless it is a properly arranged playdate, not something agreed that morning....
It isn't just a one-off btw - she is someone who is always trying to fit too much in. I just feel cross that she made me feel stressed and muddled to fit in with her super-organisation.

oh - you had a little one? I thought they were school age

even so - children 10 and under are fabulous for entertaining pre-schoolers - especially if offered bribes rewards

oh dear, I think I'm in tears now

I do hate 6.30 in our house mess everywhere, screaming children, husband about to come home and ask where the cheese is....

I think I will start a new thread about AIBU unreasonable to hate mealtimes...
signing off now...xxx lovely ladies feeling better...

awwwww

PMSL at DH askin where the cheese is

and YANBU to hate mealtimes

Your husband needs to work on his greetings..

Hi darling, how was your day? and where is the cheese?

What's the difference between an "arranged playdate" and whatever it was those kids were doing at yours?

By the way OP, parents are always late collecting children from playdates around here

Actually swanriver - I don't think you are BU! You had a deadline of 6.30pm in your head when your house would be your own again to get on with sorting out your own children, - believing the visitors would go about 6.15pm or so - and yet again, this friend turned up, in your view a bit breezy and unappreciative, and LATE. Of course all sorts of unexpected things can happen to delay someone, but I think you are cross because your friend doesn't seem to guard against the unexpected as much as you think she should. And certainly doesn't seem to appreciate that you are going yet another extra mile for her.
When my 3 children were very young, (all under 6) I found this sort of late pick up infuriating. With little ones, time is of the essence in the evening. I learned to shorten the playdate times, or even offered to take the other child(ren) home myself! Maybe you and I are exceptions!!
However, life has moved on. If someone was 15 mins late picking up a 9/10/11+ year old, I wouldn't think twice about it. I think URNBU if you are talking about very little ones, but URBU if you are talking about older children.

6.30 in my house im probably sleeping.

even when my children were young 6.30 wasnt a bad time, kids always fed by 6

Aw OP

You have had a bit of a hammering here and you sound lovely

Hope you have a good christmas

x

6.30 nightmare time in my house too

I know poor swan river
BTW is your husband a rat?

I think I would be a bit annoyed too OP; you were doing your friend a favour, and it's common courtesy to be on time or to let you know if she was going to be late. I can understand that you probably wanted to get your children ready for bed and to let them wind down for the evening.

From what you say, this friend is late frequently, and I think if that's the case then it can grate on you, and make you more irrationally annoyed with someone if they're consistently inconsiderate to you.

Well people are saying yabu but you've taken it very well, you're clearly a nice person who had an off moment. Maybe phone the other woman? She might feel you weren't performing at your usual level and be a little miffed.

I agree that 15mins isn´t long.

But I would be getting concerned if they were supposed to be going somewhere else.

And awfully rude if she´s always doing it-especially if she never apologises or gives a reason.