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Original poster

To be angry at mindee's mum for not answering her phone?

34 replies

NJE · 15/12/2010 20:21

Mum has changed one of two door locks and hasn't handed me out a key for the new lock. Until now she never locked the other lock when I had to bring her daughter home and I could open the door with the other key. I wasn't home the last two days and picked up her daughter at 6pm from the childminder today just to come home and realise that she locked both of the locks. Great. I send her emails, phoned her about 50 times over the last two hours and she doesn't answer my calls. I am really angry. I know that she has some drink do tonight but that is no reason not to look at her phone.

Luckily our neighbours came home just a few minutes ago and let us in until mum comes home. L is seven and should have been in bed by 8pm.

I am furious. L could have had an accident etc.

Mum will probably not come home before midnight.

OP posts:
thisisyesterday · 15/12/2010 20:23

do you know where she is? can you call there and ask for her rather than calling her phone?

JaJaBinks · 15/12/2010 20:26

Sorry I don't understand, you have a key to your mindees house? you picked up the child from the child minders?

QuintessentialShadows · 15/12/2010 20:27

Is she assuming you will babysit her child in her home till she gets home?

Do you normally drop the girl home after minding her? Is the mum normally home?
Or do you leave mindee home alone?

LaurieFairyonthetreeEatsCake · 15/12/2010 20:28

Op is a nanny ,? And picked up her employers dd from child miners ?

thisisyesterday · 15/12/2010 20:28

am assuming NJE is a nanny or au pair or something?

although then why the childminder?

hmm i dunno actually!

QuintessentialShadows · 15/12/2010 20:28

Who are you? The sister?

Are you talking about YOUR mum? Or mindees mum?

I dont understand.

2rebecca · 15/12/2010 20:50

I don't understand either. Calling anyone who isn't your mum "mum" is just weird.
I never gave the childminders for my kids keys to our house, I was always there and the kids were nearly always picked up by one of us from the childminders house. To me the fact that you couldn't get in the house was irrelevent, the real problem was that you couldn't hand back the kids and get on with your life. I would charge extra and tell her you won't look after her kids if she does it again as you have a social/ family life too and are not her slave.

QuintessentialShadows · 15/12/2010 20:53

I think in a nursery, if the parent fail to pick up, social services are called.

Original poster
NJE · 15/12/2010 21:00

Oh sorry for the confusion. I am a nanny during the day and live with a single mum and her daughter. Daughter goes to schol full-time and after that to a childminder until 6pm. I work three days from 9-5 and pick her up three nights a week from the childminder. Mum just got a new door and new keys and because it is a special look it takes a few days until we get it.

I just had the locksmith there but he couldn't help us unless we would destroy the door. I can not do that as I said the door is not even four weeks old and was expensive. I am just so angry, I finally got through to her and she just put down the phone after L told her what happened and she was utterly upset.

OP posts:
QuintessentialShadows · 15/12/2010 21:06

Is she on her way home now?

AliBellandthe40jingles · 15/12/2010 21:08

I still don't quite grasp the scenario, but at least you have made contact.

Is she on her way now?

2rebecca · 15/12/2010 21:10

Being uncontactable for 2 hours when paying someone to look after your child seems bizarre to me. Is she normally this feckless or is this a 1 off episode? I presume the former as I wouldn't expect you to be "furious" if she's normally reliable and pleasant. I agree with others though that I would have expected you to have been told where she is so you could phone the venue/ turn up with overtired kid in toe and make her sort it all out.

Original poster
NJE · 15/12/2010 21:21

Mum is on a drink do and yes it did happen before. I don't know where she is. She must be somewhere in Central London though and living in Zone 4 makes it hard to just turn up somewhere. Afterall I don't even know where she is. No, it's not the first time.

Please read another post I started a while ago. She still doesn't answer the phone and I am at our neigbours house. The girl has gone to sleep on the sofa now.

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/childminders_nannies_au_pairs_etc/1063467-What-would-you-do

OP posts:
ilovemyfestivehens · 15/12/2010 21:36

She sounds like an unfit parent to me. Where is the child's father?

The poor child Sad

thisisyesterday · 15/12/2010 21:37

NJE, do you live with them or are you live-out?

If she is on her way home then good, but if not I would take the girl back to your own home and tell the mother she needs to come to you and pick her up

thisisyesterday · 15/12/2010 21:38

sorry, read other thread now, you live with her and yet she didn't bother getting you a key when getting a new door fitted??

i would seriously be thinking about getting a new job tbh

thisisyesterday · 15/12/2010 21:38

and she doesn't pay you?????

ilovemyfestivehens · 15/12/2010 21:39

You should tell the authorities about the poor girl. She'd be better off living somewhere else. The mother sounds like a totally selfish bitch and doesn't deserve to have a child.

thisisyesterday · 15/12/2010 21:42

ok have read most of the other thread now and am in shock!

why are you still with them when you handed in notice in October??

Did you speak to the NSPCC? if not you need to do so!

thisisyesterday · 15/12/2010 21:44

will the childminder back you up with what you say about the mother?

perhaps you could speak to her and tell her why you are concerned and then you could both speak to social services?

This little girl needs someone else on her side. this isn't fair on her

Original poster
NJE · 15/12/2010 22:30

I have just spoken to the NSPCC. I will ring them tomorrow. The mother is still "on the p*" and will probably not come home before midnight. We are both now on the sofas at our neighbours house.

I did not go because I really love the little girl and she is like my sister to me. It is so hard for me but I have phoned the NSPCC just a few minutes ago.

I am not sure about the childminder backing me but my neighbours will because they've heard and seen quite a lot.

OP posts:
QuintessentialShadows · 15/12/2010 22:32

Well done. You sound lovely and caring. So good for the little girl that somebody is looking out for her.

annh · 15/12/2010 22:35

I'm still confused, I thought you said the neighbour had let you in - or do you mean the neighbour had let you in to their house? And the mother still hung up when her dd told her she was locked out of the house?! Awful behaviour. I hope you get some good advice from the NSPCC.

BlathIceSkate · 15/12/2010 22:42

So you're at the neighbours house? Youa are both locked out of the house you live in because you don't have a new key?

Thank goodness you have nice neighbours!!

chipmonkey · 15/12/2010 22:45

That little girl is very lucky to have you. Most people would have run for the hills after the Mum stopped paying them! I hope it all works out well for all concerned.

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