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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to feel sad that 3yo dd might never be able to achieve her potential due to tuition fees?

224 replies

bytheMoonlight · 08/12/2010 08:38

I look at dd, who is due to start nursery in January and wonder what is going to happen if one day she decides she wants a career that means going to university.

I feel so upset that her chances are being blighted before she has even entered education. We could offer her little financial support and the thought of her leaving with all that debt is beyond comprehension and would not qualify for help.

I feel so sad about this.

OP posts:
thekidsmom · 08/12/2010 09:22

I dont think its U to be worried but you do have time to do lots about it.

Without being whingey - (no, you're right, I'm being whingey) - its parents of current teenagers who are really going to struggle to offer our kids the support we'd like as we have had no notice that this was coming... no chance to save up a college fund at all.....

And I'm lucky - I have one already there, one going next year, so not affected by the rise and one going in two years.

If you're the parents of children and your eldest is in the current lower sixth you must feel like screaming......

beautyspot · 08/12/2010 09:24

YABVU - if that's all you have to worry about you're a very fortunate woman.

TheCoalitionNeedsYou · 08/12/2010 09:27

Thekidsmom - Why are parents of current teenagers going to have to struggle? It's the teenagers who will have to pay it back.

impatient1 · 08/12/2010 09:29

We could have 3 different governments by then!Look at what was policy 13 years ago and see how much everything has changed since then.
Your own circumstances could change massively before then too. I wouldnt feel too sad about it until you know for sure that it definately going to be a problem.

MackerelOfFact · 08/12/2010 09:40

It's disheartening that it seems to be getting more and more expensive, but 15 years is a long time - 15 years ago there were no tuition fees whatsoever. A lot can change.

I have 4 DCs (eldest 9, DSD), and DP and I have always talked about moving to Scotland - things like university fees just make it even more attractive. I have a comparatively small student debt (13k) which I doubt I'll ever pay off - in fact, even though I'm in the repayment bracket and paying money every month, it is inceasing rather than decreasing because of the stupid rate of interest which was set on one day in March when interest rates was unusually high.

Anyway, I digress. Your DCs (and probably mine, too) will be unlikely to pay this amount. What they might be paying by then though frankly terrifies me.

Morloth · 08/12/2010 09:44

Hang on? Are the tuition fees in the UK the same as the HECS debts we have in Australia?

It wasn't that big a deal, you get the education and then when you are making enough (I think it was $30,000 a year) you pay a little towards the HECS debt at tax time and eventually clear it. Though we made it a priority and cleared it immediately.

Is this really such an outrageous idea?

Original poster
bytheMoonlight · 08/12/2010 09:47

Lucky I don't think so.

We are both likely to lose our (low paid unskilled manual) jobs within the next year. Our hours have already been cut and we are living on the breadline praying interest rates do not rise as we can barely afford our mortgage which we have had to reduce to interest only.

Saving any money is a distant dream.

I know dd can have a very good career without a degree but what if she wants to be a doctor? I know she would get into debt through uni but at this level it would just blight her entire life, how could I encourage her if she wants to be a nurse for example, when I know the level of debt would cripple her.

That's my point tbh, it feels like a door has been shut on her. That there are certain things she cannot do now because of the level of debt it would incur.

And yes things might change, but I believe that once these are introduced they will not be taken away, dispite what government comes into power.

And we have no snow btw!

OP posts:
Concordia · 08/12/2010 09:49

i'm not worried so much that my DC 4 and 2 won't go, but that they will achieve less than what they are capable because they will be swayed by cheap / worse courses.
what if one of them wants to do medicine or architecture? i bet they will be put off because of the fees due to the length and go elsewhere instead. i can also see them going to a less prestigious uni as it will be cheaper.
Sad
actually i am feeling that i have failed my kids as i will not be able to pay for them to go to the uni of their choice without worries of debt.

peppapighastakenovermylife · 08/12/2010 09:50

ARGH. This is starting to drive me slightly crazy now. Yes the fees are going to be ridiculously high and yes that is unfair I think.

However I really dont see how it will stop anyone going to university, I really don't. You do not pay them back until you are earning a high enough wage. You then pay them back at a fixed amount - 9% of your salary. If you dont have a job, have a low paid job, a part time job etc you will not have to pay.

Threshold will be 24k they were saying the other day - a decent salary. That means that someone earning 25k will pay back the grand sum of about £7.50 a month. Really I think that is manageable. If they earn 40k and lets face it that is a pretty decent salary they will pay back £120 a month.

You will not pay if you cannot afford it. Yes people will end up taking forever to pay them off but they are cancelled at retirement anyway.

Concordia · 08/12/2010 09:50

yes we could try to save but tbh we are struggling to buy the school xmas raffle tickets don't think we can save much.
certainly not enough to make them debt free on uni, even if we never had a holiday / trip out for the next 14 years we would not manage it at all.

mamatomany · 08/12/2010 09:50

Or you might be doing her a massive favor and get it through to her from the age of 3 she isn't going to university so she needs to be creative and make her own career happen another way.
We don't have to follow our parents path, I hope mine make their own way in life not the path of least resistance and least imagination.

jonicomelately · 08/12/2010 09:51

You are wrong to think that doors have been closed on her. You and your DP have time to retrain and save money over the next 15 years if you think the only way for her into University is for you to pay.

mamatomany · 08/12/2010 09:52

And if she wants and has the ability to be a Doctor the university will help her, they have to interview a certain number of people from certain postcodes etc if she's good enough they will get her in some how.

peppapighastakenovermylife · 08/12/2010 09:54

Concordia - if they are clever enough to do medicine or architecture then they will get a well paid job and be able to afford to pay them back with no difficulty!

Even if they earn 100k a year they will only pay back around £500 a month out of a take home package of around £8500.

I really do not see how this will affect anything.

Morloth · 08/12/2010 09:54

But if she wanted to be a doctor why could she not do that and then just pay towards the debt when she earns enough? Am I missing something here? Did uni in the UK used to be free or something?

welshbyrd · 08/12/2010 09:55

hmmmmmm 3 years old, is a bit young to worry I suppose

If your that worried move to WALES, our tuition fees are staying the same for people who have lived in the country over 3 years

peppapighastakenovermylife · 08/12/2010 09:56

And I don't understand why people are worried about their children being debt free after university. I have a student loan of 15k plus other loans from post grad. I simply pay them back like I pay the mortgage, council tax etc Confused

Simple fact - you do not pay them back unless you are earning a decent salary. Presumably the degree helped you earn that decent salary. If you didnt get the degree you wouldnt be earning that amount of money anyway Confused

orangepoo · 08/12/2010 09:57

Lots can change in this sort of timescale. It's OK to consider this sort of thing now, but it is not OK to feel sad and worried about it. My kids are 4 and 2 so I am in a similar position to you. So many things can happen in this timescale. Have you bought your property? You may be in a position to move into a smaller place when your DC are ready to leave home and liquidate a bit of cash to help with uni. Don't panic about it now. Although we should have regard for the future, we shouldn't forget about the present.

mamatomany · 08/12/2010 09:57

So keep pressing enter when I am not finished.
What you can do to help your 3 year old be a Doctor, is get her playing an instrument to grade 8, make sure she goes to a school achieving level 5 in science, take her to museums, show her how everything works around the house.
Volunteer for St Johns ambulance, make sure she completes her duke of edinburgh award (goes to a school that offers it).
So much is in the parents hands as well as making sure she takes the right GCSE's and ALevels.

Deliaskis · 08/12/2010 09:57

YAB a bit U, and I hope you don't pass this defeatist attitude on to your DD, as in reality it is that which is more likely to limit her ability to achieve her full potential, not the fees. As peppapig has stated, fees are to be paid back after graduating, at a reasonable rate, when in a reasonably-paid job.

I do agree to some extent with Concordia though, that some people might not feel they can 'justify' a long course at an expensive uni, and might end up on what will ultimately be a less valuable course instead.

D

TheCoalitionNeedsYou · 08/12/2010 09:58

bytheMoonlight - You would just need to tell her to go ahead and that as everyone else in her position will have the same debt this is unlikely to count against her later in life.

As a nurse on band 5 (the pay scale that incldues those whose job title is 'Nurse', not specialised, student or managerial), she would have to pay back between £17 and £750 pounds a year.

(based on 9% of income over 21k and being liberal with my rounding.)

Deliaskis · 08/12/2010 09:59

Meant to add, on the up side, I do think it will make people think a little more carefully about the actual value of the course they are choosing, to be as sure as possible that it will help them in their chosen field of employment. I don't that's a bad thing.

D

orangepoo · 08/12/2010 09:59

and just to add the money I got as help for uni from my parents came from my grandparents when they died. Not to wish this sort of thing, but just to say sometimes things happen like this.

TheCoalitionNeedsYou · 08/12/2010 10:04

My daughter is 3 at the moment, so anything could happen in the next 15 years, but at the moment I expect we will be in a position to pay her university tuition fees.But I have no intention of doing so. The thought of the money she may have to pay back will I think help people really think about what it is they want to do.

BreconBeBuggered · 08/12/2010 10:07

I can't tell you how hacked off I am about this on a personal level. DS1 was born in Wales, we moved to Scotland when he was 3 and only moved to England in the last few years. He's due to start uni in 2012.
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaarghhhhhhhhh.
And okay, the debt will be 'his', great, but what about his living expenses? We're not on an especially low income but we don't have enough to save (DC have never had a holiday that didn't involve staying with friends/relatives, for instance). There isn't a decent uni within commuting distance.
He's fucked, isn't he?????