ExP spending £70 plus on toys for DD

[WisteriaWoman]

DD has just been taken out by her dad and they went to Toys R Us. They came back with two games for her DS and some DS extras. Total £72. It's not even Xmas yet. AGGHH

Do I take two of the 3 items back to the shop and get a credit note (she's already opened one DS game ) or do I keep them back for Xmas.

I'm livid that every time he sees her he throws money at her.
Bah humbug

When I voice my concerns to ExP he just says - oh she told me to go there. She's 6 FFS !!

YABU, In fact what he buys his Daughter (unless it is dangerous) is really none of your business. Taking them back to the shop for a credit note is in fact "stealing" them.

Would you accept him criticising your choices in regard to your Daughter.

Its actually nothing to do with you OP! mind your own!

I would consider something brought into my home becomes part of my business. what stays at his isn't

My XP just gave our DD 100 pounds to spend on Xmas gifts for everyone (he is the NRP and lives abroad). I think it's very generous of him but I also think it's extremely excessive as she doesn't have much of an understanding about money. She is 8 years old and I think 100 pounds is wwaaaay too much. I tried to discuss this with him but was over-ruled. It's his decision, I guess. I will try to guide DD but I still think it's ridiculous.

yabvu, you would be out of order to take any of it back. he is her daughter too, if i was him and you took it back i would be fuming, why is it only up to you what she has and why only you to chose what items she has (changing it for a credit note obviosuly so you can chose the items not him)

No! Lunar, you are being ridiculous, does dd have separate clothes at your homes too?

I think a certain amount of growing up needs to be done!

The original post was about the excessiveness on the build up to christmas. Outcome being that two DS games were with NRP permission held back til christmas. sound very grown up solution to me.

The fact is that if they were still together it probably wouldn't have happened because the NRP would have already known and respected the RP opinion on the matter.

on the clothes front actually the answer is yes, but only because he has interesting ideas as to what is appropriate in kids clothes.

Would you return a gift given to your child by any other member of family? Why is it OK to take away a child's gift given to them by their father? YABU

Would you be OK with her father returning a gift you bought her?

Just to add another perspective,
my Dad was a Disney Dad to the extreme. My days out with him consisted of hours spent in Hamleys or Harrods toy kingdom, followed by lunches at anywhere that sold huge ice creams. He spent a small fortune on me. I don't think my Dad knew what else he should be doing with me, he spent months at a time working away.

My Mum was from a council estate, and had next to nothing, although my Dad always paid plenty in maintenance and provided us somewhere to live.

Understandably, my Mum used to get quite upset that she couldn't provide the material things that he could, she has told me now that I'm an adult, but she never let me know at the time. I'm proof that children grow up to remember which parent it was that was there when school finished every day, who is there for the illness and everything else that goes on throughout childhood. And I know that I never once thought 'Daddy buys me more stuff than Mummy so he is my favourite', or anything remotely simelar.

It is understandable that this is hard for you, but try not to overthing it, and remember that your dd will barely think about it at all.