to be getting a bit fed up with comments about how 'different' my dc3 looks?

[LetThemEatCake]

dark haired family, dc3 is randomly blonde

although not so random really as dh was also blonde until 6.

getting bored of people saying "OMG!! he's so blonde!!" But no big deal, just boring.

But twice in last week - "he doesn't look like he should be yours" from one and "are you sure he's yours?" from another. Which, stupidly, panged and rankled.

Get milkman comments all the time as AS1 is huge and blond.

I have two fair children me and DP are fair and I still get the look how blonde they are I think it is something people say about fair children. As for milkman comments I would just and say shh DP might hear you

Just ignore it - I get this all the time, as my son is really blonde and both my husband and I are really dark, but were blonde as kids. And yes, I am VERY fed up of explaining this. He looks so like my husband otherwise though that there's never any "is he the wrong baby" jibes..

It is annoying, but in the long run, worse things happen at sea!

As a swarthy-looking, dark-haired, dark-eyed woman I'm occasionally relieved to be the mother of a blond, blue-eyed, peaches & cream skinned son. "What? That child over there having a hissy fit? Sorry. Nothing to do with me love"

girlsyearapart - in basic genetics, brown eyes = dominant gene, blue eyes = recessive gene.
So - if you have one brown gene and one blue gene, that --> brown eyes.
you need to have two blue genes to have blue eyes - but if both parents have one brown and one blue gene, both parents would still have brown eyes but they would both be able to pass on the blue eye gene - and if one child ended up with blue eye genes from both parents, then that child would have blue eyes.

Eye colour is not fixed for some time - the time varies enormously depending on who you listen to! - but it can take a year or even longer. There have been reports of eyes continuing to change colour up to 12yo!! However, the later colour changes may be related to changes in health as well.

I am still waiting to see whether or not my DS's eyes remain blue - there is blue in my family but my eyes are grey; and DH's eyes are green. DS's eyes do look blue, but there is the potential that they will end up like mine (which have variable colour depending on light, clothes, make up etc. - sometimes bluer, sometimes greyer, sometimes greener). DS is nearly 3 now, so they may stay blue - but I keep watching! :)

Don't worry about it. I know it can be pretty annoying. I get asked if I am my daughter's babysitter, it drives me crazy. My husband is Italian, I am Nigerian/Australian, and our dd 9mth old looks mixed Chinese

DDO looks nothing like me at all, though is clearly her fathers daughter. I get lots of 'looks' but not comments.

Some things are just obvious and people say them - will probably say them forever so you might want to relax & let it wash over you rather than let it wind you up. I have a friend who is 6'8" - guess what 99.5% of people say to him when they meet him? Always, and forever, no matter where he is, no matter what country he's in .....

Ha you should see how different my two are, I love it. People comment but it's fine, all done in good spirits.

Of course he yours! Many children are blonder when little anyway.

we have a family joke about my uncle being the milkmans

he is in his 50's now

he looks like no one we know but apparently just like the milkman

well I get fed up with comments about how my dd looks exactly like me, when she does not. If you ask me she looks exactly like her father.

my family have suggested that DS is actually a clone of his father, and I was just the host for 9 months. Everyone says he looks nothing like me (which is lucky for him!). We were looking at photos of DH as a toddler the other day, and DS really is his double. I'm hoping any subsequent children at least have 1 of my features (so long as it's not my vast backside, of course)!!

I found out recently that my entire family thought a friends son was adopted - he has very olive skin and dark features, which his parents don't.

I had to tell the stunned lot of them about recessive genes and their Asian roots.

At least they are too polite to have ever mentioned it!

DD doesn't obviously look like either me or DP, it is quite funny watching people look for family features.

Used to happen to my aunt a lot about her 4th child... it got on Aunt's nerves quite visibly ; we all used to go on about it in the family, that cousin must have inherited his grandmother's looks (dark eyes and hair) rather than his mother's red hair/fair skin or his dad's fair skin/blue eyes.

It turned out that Cousin did have a different dad -- this is a huge family secret, Very few know about it, even Cousin himself (now age 30) doesn't know. I feel awful for my poor aunt.

People say all sorts of things. When I was younger we'd go to Ireland and I would always be getting, "Aren't you the very image of your Mother comments"....and I look nothing like her. Think my Dad's gene's took over.

DS1 is blond and I NEVER thought I'd have a blond child, but he has my family's facial features. DS2 is the spitting image of his dad. They do not look similar, but I was a little when a woman recently said to me, "They do look very different." There was no need to explain anything (!) but I felt she was wanting something!

Thanks diddl and thumbwitch

She's only 4 months so I guess there's time for them to change anyway.

I always wished I'd taken after my dad in colouring he has black hair and green eyes which imo is a lovely combination.

Would be quite nice in a family novelty way if dd3 kept blue eyes, the others had changed by now but then I kept the breastfeeding up longer with dd3 and I'm sure I read somewhere that has something to do with when their eyes change ?

It's just 'small talk' - why get wound up by it?

My godson often used to get told that he looked so much like his Mum or his Dad - people would argue which one he was more like - he's adopted

Mloo - I feel worse for your Uncle and worse still for your Cousin - he's 30 and other people know but not him :(

mine are all very blonde.

when people comment on it i say 'ah well, the postmans blond too..' to wind DH up (though DH is very blond). random children alleged DD1 was not actually mine, but adopted..i had to laugh at the way their 'whispers' were loud enough for me to hear a good 30 yards away.

do you think you are being a teensy bit over sensitive - surely this sort of thing is just said to pass the time of day?

i thought from the title this was going to be about a child that looked different as in odd...

my children are quite odd. i like that about them.

sings 'different is good' from 3rd and bird...

Although I have dark brown hair now, I had white blonde curly hair as a child, and am very pale with grey-green eyes. My Mum has (well, had - it's silver now) poker-straight black hair, hazel eyes and olive skin. On more than once occasion, some batty old mare accused her of having stolen me - I remember a couple of these incidents myself! The fact that I am the spitting image of her facially clearly passed them by. Mum used to flash her eyes from side to side in a crazed fashion and hiss 'you can't prove it!' in a menacing way, then run off... to somewhere where she could wet herself laughing. My brother was also blonde as a baby, so it just continued when he came along.

Am pg myself now and DP is very fair, so I'll probably have a blonde baby and go through this nonsense myself (although I won't get het up). People just engage mouth before brain.

I am a dark haired person bark brown eyes, ds is very blond, has classic ginger colouring (Scottish daddy ) but no one has ever said a word to me about it.

I think it is very telling of the times that people think its ok to question parentage, behaviour and make other rude comments when they have only briefly met someone.

I have a similar situation in that I am very dark and DD is blonde. People always say, 'Oh my god, she's so blonde. Was DH blonde as a baby?'

In fact we were both blonde and I am sure DD will be dark later as she has dark eyelashes.

I just say something like, 'She's definitely mine!' or, 'I didn't take my eyes off her in the hospital!'.

People don't mean anything by it although I think it is rude to comment any further than that.

This is the worst one I have ever heard along these lines. My blue eyed blonde counsin's wife is black . Both their babies are blue eyed blondes with fair skin. So they obvioulsy don;t look much like my lovely 'Cousin-in-law.'

She told me that when she was in the MATERNITY ward having just given birth she was pushing the plastic crib thingy along a corridor and was passed by some nasty visitors she has seen before and got a very loud stage whispery comment. "oh look - there's that black woman with the white baby - gross!!!"

I kid you not!!

Thumbwitch can you explain where green eyes come from pretty please? I have them but no-one else in my family does and I've not passed them on either.

Should I be tracking down a retired milkman?

Some people have to put a nasty interpretation on everything.

A relative of mine is utterly convinced that a celebrity family's second child is not actually the husband's child. Reasoning: because the child is apparently the image of his uncle. So, she is certain the wife had an affair with her brother-in-law. Can't be recessive genes, or anything, oh no.

My uncle and aunt have 3 Dc's and as children, the eldest had dark brown hair and brown eyes, the middle one had blond hair and blue eyes and the youngest had blond hair and brown eyes. They were travelling on a bus once and my aunt was asked about the childrens 'father's' so aunty said that the eldest was the coalman's, the middle the milkmans and the youngest was the plumbers. That shut the woman up!