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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to expect to get offered breakfast or at least a cup of tea before now on a ward ?

88 replies

shocknews · 21/11/2010 09:49

I know people are busy etc (midwives don't do the food/drink here) but would it be particularly out of order to have hoped to be offered at least a cup of tea before 9.30am ! I delivered yesterday lunchtime, was given no lunch but was offered 2 slices of toast after i'd been sorted out etc. Then the tea scrum was at 6 (you get what there is left, no orders taken etc) and between then and now, not even a cup of tea or glass of water offered ! I had to ask for a jug of water at 11pm when I gave up waiting patiently ! How can they expect me to try to breast feed with no sustinence ?

...... or am I just hormonal and absolutely knackered from 3 sleepless nights already ?

OP posts:
ENormaSnob · 21/11/2010 09:51

Unless you had a section you are expected to get up and get your own.

Our postnatal wards have kitchens and patients get their own, thus freeing staff to help the incapacitated.

Yabu

AmazingBouncingFerret · 21/11/2010 09:51

Is there no breakfast room where you can go and help yourself anytime of the day/night?
It's not nice but Ive found you do have to ask rather than them telling you unfortunately.

Congratulations BTW!

faverolles · 21/11/2010 09:52

YANBU
In my local hospital, unless you have had a cs, breakfast is self serve, as the mw's like to encourage new mothers to be up and about. Could this be the case here?

minibmw2010 · 21/11/2010 09:52

Congratulations on your new addition .. however, if you have enough energy to post on here, do you have enough energy to sort yoursef out a drink? Yes, you shouldn't have to do it yourself, but clearly they are busy so I'd just get up and sort yourself out.

AmazingBouncingFerret · 21/11/2010 09:53

Good thing though, if everything is ok with you you'll probably be out by lunchtime!

ANTagony · 21/11/2010 09:53

Congratulations! What did you have?

You are not being unreasonable. Did you fill in a form stating what you'd like? If not it is possible you've been missed - I hate the system of it not settling down until you've been in a couple of days. Surely in high turnover wards like maternity they could work out a better system.

I'd ask a member of staff - if you can get hold of one. You're quite right you need substinance. Do you have any visitors coming in that could bring you emergency supplies of juice and cereal bars etc?

Frazzledmumwithsmudgedmascara · 21/11/2010 09:54

YANBU

I was very lucky when I had DS last year; our hospital has catering assistants that bring the meals to your bed, and you get to choose prior to each meal what you'd like. The food was lovely and I actually really enjoyed it all, despite what people say about hospital food, lol.

After giving birth, the midwife went off and made me toast, hot chocolate, and got me some fruit etc. And the healthcare assistants were constantly popping by and refilling my water jug when on the ward.

Congratulations to you BTW

plantsitter · 21/11/2010 09:55

I dunno what all your postnatal wards were like but on the one I was on, I would have welcomed the chance to help myself to water, food etc but wasn't allowed! Total waste of midwife resources imo and very frustrating to have to wait ages for a drink of water.

Don't forget post natal wards are not all the same.

AuntiePickleBottom · 21/11/2010 09:57

really depends on the hospital, the one i work at breakfast is served at 8am, but you have to go to the breakfast room (unless you can't walk which i rare as c-section stay on the labour ward for 24 hours)

bigchris · 21/11/2010 09:57

Is this your first? Congrats! I didn't have a cs with my first but had three epidurals and was told not to move without assistance
they had to lift the baby out of the cot to pass to me to feed
so definitely had to bring my breakfast
I ticked a form for cereal iirc

edam · 21/11/2010 09:58

YANBU but do check it's because you haven't been told about the ward kitchen, as others have said.

You think you've got it bad, that Ch4 programme about births - can't remember what it was called but it was a series - showed one diabetic woman IN LABOUR who needed to eat after taking an injection of insulin. People kept promising 'it'll be here soon' but she was left without food for hours - very dangerous.

beijingaling · 21/11/2010 09:59

Surely if there is a breakfast area or whatever one of the mw should have pointed it out to the OP at some point instead of just assuming that she would know?

I'd also ask a member of staff and ask a friend/OH to bring snacks!

fel1x · 21/11/2010 09:59

I remember thinking the same when I was in.
I asked in the end and they told me there was a breakfast room from about 8am and you just go and help yurslef to toast and tea and cereal etc
As where it is quick or you'll miss it!!

CerealOffender · 21/11/2010 10:00

i would just go home unless there is a medical need to be there

expatinscotland · 21/11/2010 10:02

check yourself out.

if men had babies they'd be in hospital for a week being waited on hand and foot.

shocknews · 21/11/2010 10:03

Unfortunately there is only an option of getting water (which I did know about BUT no jug or cups !) No facilities for tea or toast at all. Breakfast is offered then brought to you. I had a normal delivery and would gladly go downstairs to the canteen but can't take bubs and wouldn't want to leave him alone.

There is a day room on this ward but no tv or comfy seats just a dining table & chairs, no option to have tv by your beds either !

When I came on the ward there was no loo roll, no soap, no paper towels, no alcohol gel etc, i'm still having to use top-to-toe stuff to wash my hands as no soap available for the dispenser !!

I may )e feeling pretty grouchy, but come on, this hospital only opened a year ago ! I HATE having to mither the already hassled staff.

OP posts:
lottiejenkins · 21/11/2010 10:05

Sounds horrendous.......Shock No handwashing or alcohol gel?? yuck yuck yuck........

expatinscotland · 21/11/2010 10:12

Are you at Paisley RAH? Sounds just like it.

shocknews · 21/11/2010 10:18

I don't really mean to sound harsh, it's a lovely new hospital and the staff have been superb (and I work for the nhs), I just hadn't realised quite how rubbishly unorganised the company who do the cleaning and catering are !
Hoping to escape later today but waiting for second set of bloods to be taken from bubs (had prolonged rupture of membrane before del).
Ps this is number 3 and with dd1 I had an emcs but still got up to go to dayroom to get my breakfasts the following day (that was a diff hospital).
Rant over, feeling better now I don't feel like my throat'd been slit !!!

OP posts:
Vallhala · 21/11/2010 10:20

Congratulations!

You learn something every day, I never knew that maternity units often had their own kitchens for patients' use. (Disclaimer: I discharged myself on the same day that I had DD1 and had a section so couldn't move with DD2, plus it was 15 and 13 years ago).

If I were you, unless there is a medical reason not to, I'd discharge myself. In fact, as I did with DD1, I would have done so as soon as I felt I was able to move!

Marrow · 21/11/2010 10:20

YANBU. I went into hospital to have DD at 5pm one evening. I had only had a bowl of soup for lunch that day.

I wasn't allowed to eat anything whilst in labour. Had DD at 8am by emergency section. Told I couldn't have anything to eat straight after that. Lunches came round but they had nothing for me.

When the dinners came round at 5pm that evening they walked straight past my bed. I asked if I could have something to eat and they told me there was nothing for me. At this point hormonal and extremely hungry after having been through labour and not eaten anything since a bowl of soup over 30 hours earlier I burst into tears! Eventually they brought me some toast and I have to say it is the best toast I have ever had!

macdoodle · 21/11/2010 10:21

Was hideous when I had my first 9yrs ago, and not changed when I had my 2nd 3 yrs ago.
The first time I sent my husband home for a bacon sandwhich, the second my wonderful best friend bought me a rescue pack from M+S with fruit, nuts, etc.
YANBU!

DamselInDisgrace · 21/11/2010 10:28

The hospital insisted I stay overnight with DS2 so he could see a paed (because he'd been a ventouse delivery). I didn't get anything to eat at all until about 3pm when DH arrived because I was always feeding the baby during the very short periods of time that they made food available in a room at the other end of the ward. It was not good at all. I also had to wait 3 hours (and ask 4 times) for some painkillers, was never issued with the prescription I was supposed to take home (I had to get it from the GP instead) and DS2 never saw a paed because they were too busy to do ward rounds. The great irony of the whole debacle was that DS would have seen a doctor 24 hours earlier if thread let me go home and see the GP in the morning rather than insisting on keeping me in.

10 years ago, when I had DS1, they made me stay in for 3 days for no good reason. I had to fill in those forms every morning saying what I wanted, but never got what I ordered. For some reason they kept insisting that I have liver, even though I tried to point out that I was vegetarian and would never have ordered liver. Liver, onions and tinned potatoes. Eurgh.

humanoctopus · 21/11/2010 10:32

YANBU. I'm all for doing what you can for yourself to free up nursing time, etc., but I do think that we should take better care of our new mums. If mum and baby are to stay together, etc then who minds the baby whilst mum goes to breakfast/dining rooms? A bit of pampering is lovely when you are all sore one end and emotional on the other? Hope you get to go home soon and have someone take care.

expatinscotland · 21/11/2010 10:40

It's not pampering, it's looking after patients. In no other area of the hospital are people treated as poorly.

By the time I had DS, no. 3, I took my own pain meds, food, cleaning supplies and TV in with me. Everything but the kitchen sink.

As for looking after incapacitated patients, they didn't even do that!

The lady next to me had a CS. They kept 'forgetting' to feed her till one of the other girls in the ward brought her a meal.

Then, they left her sitting in a chair, unable to get up, with her baby out of reach. So I had to wheel the baby to the mother - on legs still on pins and needles after epidural and ventouse delivery.

Another time, they left in that chair and the baby puked all over her sheets. The other girl and I changed them.

I don't know what they were all so busy doing, because it wasn't looking after anyone.

I told them I wanted to leave the next day at 6AM.

By 6PM, no paed, no dismissal, and DH had driven 2 hours to collect us.

I told them I was walking out, then and there, as we lived a very long way away (they knew this, too).

They got someone in in about 10 minutes.