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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

SIL childcare fee's....

63 replies

celebmum · 20/11/2010 17:59

hi all.. opinions please!

I'm due to return to work in Jan after 9 blissfull months of mat leave..
I'm lucky enough to be able to reduce my hrs too, and when i return i intend to leave my DS wil my SIL.
I live opposite the school that SIL DD1&2 go to, so the plan is that SIL will drop her 2 at school, collect my DS, have him for 4hrs and then meet me outside work/in the town.. Every Monday & Friday and alternate Tuesdays (approx 40hrs a month)
SIL will also have her DD3 (12weeks younger than my DS). She does not work, never has.
SIL originally wanted £60pw..I have offered her £120 a month as i think that this is reasonable and she has accepted.

AIBU for knocking the price down?

(my Mum, DH and I will share the childcare on the other days and also i will be buying my DS a carseat for her car and a double pushchair for her to use)

thanks
x

OP posts:

Laquitar · 20/11/2010 22:34

Childminders don't earn £3 or £3.50 ph.
They charge this ammount for each child and they look after more than one so they make much more per hr. On the other hand they have much more expenses and they pay tax.

Your SIL's situation is very different and she might be happy with this money. My guess is that she is expecting something very informal and flexible/laid back? If you expect the same thats fine.
But if you expect to dictate every aspect of the childcare and expect nanny service for £3ph then she might decide that it is not worth. For example meals, activities, time outdoors etc. Would you be ok if your ds watches tv so sil can cook/clean, or if she takes him to tesco for her weekly shop? If yes, then it can work for both of you, it works for many families.

Laquitar · 20/11/2010 22:35

And have you talked about holidays and sickness?

cumfy · 20/11/2010 23:09

She should have haggled a bit.

What would you have done if she said £180pm final offer ?

CarGirl · 21/11/2010 13:16

So originally she was going to accept £1.50ish per hour, £3 per hour sounds fine then!

violethill · 21/11/2010 13:28

£3 per hour! Are you having a laugh!

That's peanuts. I guess if she's never worked, and sees this as just an 'extra', and is happy with it, then fair enough, but frankly I would feel very uncomfortable paying so little.

I would also make sure you feel really happy with the arrangements, as some people I know in similar situations are swayed by the fact that they can get childcare from relatives either free or cheaper than the going rate, and this colours their decision making, rather than looking objectively at what is the absolute best affordable care for your child

pinkdelight · 21/11/2010 13:29

Someone please correct me if I'm wrong, but as I understand it, it's fine for close family to do childcare without registering, but they are not allowed to charge for it, or even be paid in kind/given gifts for it. If they're doing it because they're family, they do it for free. If they're getting paid, they have to register in some capacity and most certainly declare the income. Is that not the case?

notpartofthelifeplan · 21/11/2010 13:36

£3 per hour may be peanuts in some areas but not all. Around here childminders charge up to £8 an hour. In other areas that would be considered a fortune. My niece is a childminder and charges £3.50 an hour and £3.00 for siblings she also has an outstanding rating from OFSTED.

notpartofthelifeplan · 21/11/2010 13:37

Close family do not have to register and they can charge what they want.

sayithowitis · 21/11/2010 13:59

Depends how much you value the relationship with your SIL. Personally, whoever suggested it, I think she is going way beyond what most CMs would do in terms of collect and drop off, also in accommodating your working hours. I don't know what it costs locally for a CM, but I know that several years ago, the Local Authority was suggesting a minimum of £5 ph to its registered CMs. And telling them to insist that they should be charging for shift patterns like yours, where it is a week on and a week off, at the full rate because it would be unlikely that a CM would be able to find another child to mind whose parents' shifts would compliment the unusual shifts IYSWIM.

If you were paying the legal minimum wage, you would be paying around £240 for 40 hours work!

And, is it really worth penny pinching on the care of your child? If SIL decides that it is not worth what you pay and you have to find a CM, you will be paying far more who does not have the same level of emotional investment in your child as your SIL does.

mumeeee · 21/11/2010 16:31

If you are paying her she neds to be a registered child minder. You are right close family members don't have to be registered but I thik that is if they are not taking money.

cumfy · 21/11/2010 16:32

Close family do not have to register and they can charge what they want.

They would have to pay tax in that case.

I don't think that is part of OP's plans.

notpartofthelifeplan · 22/11/2010 10:08

Cumfy. Her sil won't be earning enough to pay tax.

cumfy · 22/11/2010 11:17

npotlp

Yes!
I suppose unless she has other income or is charging £5k/y for CM duties. :o

Am I right in thinking that SIL could, if she wanted register as a CM, with about 30hrs of free courses. Then OP's DH (or OP if she was earning enough to pay tax) could recoup their income tax by paying SIL in childcare vouchers ?

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