To expect SIL to have money she owes me?

[stac14]

Hi all, looking for a bit of advice. Last year I loaned my sil money to buy a car and get through xmas last year. The agreement was to pay back £50 per month and have the bulk paid back by this xmas for my kids presents. Needless to say she has not managed to pay £50 per month so I told her we needed at least £500 by the begining of December. Dp just told me today she hasn't got it. She is on benefits and I know she struggles but I think on the basis she has always known when I needed the money back for I am not being unreasonable. What do you think I should do?

Was the car just a rubbish buy that broke down rapidly (although I wouldn't expect much for £500) or did they have a crash?

some one crashed into them, an old man driving down the road hit about 4 cars at their building, he didnt put the claim in and has caused 4 people problems regarding thier insurance etc, to be honest it has been a nightmare for her

If he hit her then it's up to her to put a claim in not him. She should have got his number and contacted her insurance co immediately.

I think that if you lend money to family, they very often expect not to have to pay it back. It's also unlikely that someone will be able to pay back money if they have to borrow it in the first place and their circumstances are not due to change in the near future.

I do feel for you because you did them a generous favour. If you're otherwise close I would let it go though. If you fall out it could go on for years and surely £500 isn't worth that? It's not fair on you but life's not fair is it?

its £1100 that i loaned her when her dh had the chance of more shifts, the car had a couple of things to sort which her uncle did free of charge. Regarding the insurance she had to take it to an independant claims handler as the man said it wasnt his fault due to having taken ill while driving. As far as i am aware she hasnt done this. She is quite chaotic and no i dont want to fall out but i think i may struggle to be civil due to the situation we have been left in. I just hope something can be sorted

If he hit her it's still his fault even if he got taken ill whilst driving and his insurance co should pay out. She shouldn't have to go through the small claims court though as her insurance co should be dealing with this for her.

i agree i think she just left it. I'll ask dp to check it out. Her insurance was only 3rd party fire and theft dont know if that meant she didnt have legal cover.

she had to take it to an independant claims handler as the man said it wasnt his fault due to having taken ill

I don't understand this.

Clearly in law his being ill almost makes him more culpable.
Can't see any insurance company offering this as an excuse as they could be sued for malpractice/ censured by their umbrella organisation.

Are you sure she hasn't just successfully claimed and decided not to tell you, as you would want the cash ??

Perhaps discuss with her direct payment to you from this "independant claims handler", get their name, claim ref number, or see any documents from said handler.

i asked dp about it today and he said her insurance company wouldnt pursue it as she didnt have legal cover (??) anyway the police did go to him but he was in hospital. If i'm honest i think they offered her an answer but she didnt follow it through. I am begining to think she is thick or just want to have hassle. We have found a number online offering £200 for any car so she can do that. Im sick of her. She said she will have money, but will believe it when i see it we have had to try to find other measures but I'm not letting it go and have told dp that his sis can put £10 per week in my savings account to pay the rest back

if she is on benefits then tell her to apply for a budgeting loan. she is entitled to one. its meant for furniture and any thing else thats a large amount of money needed by someone on benefit. it is completely interest free and they will take it back out of her benefit at £5 or £10 per week. she will then get your money in a lump sum. it only takes a week to sort out. its the best way for you to get your money and she can pay it back over a couple of years and not even miss it. demand it i would. good luck.

I think you're being strung along with the insurance story.

He is obliged in law to supply insurance details.
Police will have those details (since they went to see him).
Then simply contact his insurers.
He has it seems admitted liability.

If he isn't insured he is in deep shit, and any criminal prosecution (careless driving, criminal ddamage) would pay her compensation.

I think she may already have collected, but is not letting on.

Do you feel up to volunteering to ring the insurance company of the person that hit her car yourself and getting the ball rolling?

Would be a pain for you but if she refuses then it might show that she has already had money and is fobbing you off again. Or if she is genuinely chaotic then it might mean that you will get money back more quickly than you would do otherwise.

If the other bloke reckons he had the accident because he was taken ill then surely he is admitting liability and is therefore responsible, regardless of your sil's cover?

I would also ask her to personally explain to your dc that the reason they are not getting very much for christmas is because she borrowed some money from you and despite promising to pay it back in time for you to buy everything you needed for christmas (and knowing that it was earmarked as your christmas money) she has not bothered been able to.

At least that would make her see that her actions are having knock on effects for others - and might make her more likely to pay you back a bit more quickly...