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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To wonder if fat people overfeed their babies....

173 replies

LittlebearH · 16/11/2010 15:22

Ok...bit of a judgy one I am guilty. I am ready to get flamed!

But I have been to a few baby groups there and cannot help but wonder why a few (VERY) large mothers seem to have overweight babies.

One this morning had a 4 and a half month old who weighed 20lbs and she was weaning him already too. She also told me he has 7 7oz bottles a day. He was just over 8lb when born 2 weeks over due.

My DD is 9 months and only weighs 18lbs and is fully weaned. She is on the 25th centile and I am not underfeeding her!! :)

I was a bit Shock when she told me he is weaning him. Is she over feeding??
Has anyone else wondered this?

OP posts:
A1980 · 16/11/2010 22:46

My DD is 9 months and only weighs 18lbs and is fully weaned. She is on the 25th centile and I am not underfeeding her!!

I can't help thinking this was post was a deliberate brag. I.E. my baby is smaller than those fat pigs' babies.

bluenordic · 16/11/2010 22:54

YANBU - you only need to go to the USA to see the effects of fat parents on subsequent generations.

YankNCock · 16/11/2010 23:07

The thing I've taken away from going to baby groups is that there is a huge range of weights, sizes and milestone achievements in our babies, and none of it correlates with size/age/education of the mother.

Obviously it's a small sample size, but perhaps bigger than the OP who's seen 'a few' fat women with fat babies and leapt to the conclusion that they overfeed Hmm

FWIW, in my baby group, my DS is one of the leanest and I am a size 20. The woman with the very chunky, off the charts DD is very tall and slim.

ChippingIn · 16/11/2010 23:14

You know when really, you've just had enough of stupid ignorant people and really - you just want to slap them....

You know who you are.... get in line....

pigletmania · 16/11/2010 23:19

YABU. A mum cannot help the childs birth weight, my dd was born she was 8.4, i am a little overweight hardly porking it. You cannot overfeed a baby, they take what milk they need, its ludricous to think that a baby needs a diet. And hey, i weaned my dd 3.9 at 4 months, and guess what she is as skinny as hell and hardly eats. There is no way I can overfeed her, she will just refuse food.

MilkNoSugarPlease · 16/11/2010 23:24

Alright Chip, hows it going :o

justonemorethen · 16/11/2010 23:30

Of course. Some people do feed their kids crap. I was in hostel where girls feed their kids Dairylea at 6 months old.I obviously pointed out that the salt was very dangerous. However babies are just fat so who can tell.

Trouble is if parents feel it's OK to eat processed shit then so will their kids.I seriously know no one that seperate child meals over the age of 5 years old.

ChippingIn · 17/11/2010 00:19

Hi Milk

I was fine until the tits decided today was 'FattyBashingDay' on MN.

Now I'm fairly pissed off - there are some ignorant feckers out there.

Digggers · 17/11/2010 07:19

The thing I find more disturbing than the OP is the realms of women here reeling off what they weigh, what their babies way, what their friends and families weigh and what their friends and families weigh?

Anyone else not got a clue what they and their LO s weigh and doesn't really care as they are healthy and happy and they aren't obsessed by weight?

TattyDevine · 17/11/2010 07:44

Justonemorethen Dairy lee only has 0.1g of salt. This still leaves a big margin for the rest of their food for the day to not reach their daily limit. It is otherwise a good source of protein and calcium, and granted whilst it is "processed", a six month old probably could not handle a chunk of extra mature Davidstow cheddar on a cracker.

I reckon you sounded pretty OTT saying to them the "salt was very dangerous" at 0.1g!

LittlebearH · 17/11/2010 07:45

I would like to apologise AGAIN for the thread title as it was meant to be amended. It was more about the women I saw not about all large women in general.

I am sorry if I offended anyone.
It wasnt my intention.

OP posts:
sarah293 · 17/11/2010 07:50

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

domesticsluttery · 17/11/2010 08:03

IME most mothers who are overweight themselves will be extra careful about what their DC eat. I know I am. I have always been quite big, I am a size 16/18 which I know isn't morbidly obese but it is still bigger than I should be. I have 3 DC and am incredibly careful about making sure that they eat a balanced and healthy diet.

As it happens my 4yr old DD has never been higher than the 9th centile for weight (despite eating like a horse). DS1 was a chubby baby though, on the 75th centile for both height and weight. He was weaned at 4 months, not because he was overfed but because that was the advice back then. He was quite chubby until he was about 2. He is now 8 and despite being fairly tall for his age is on the 25th centile for weight. He still eats like a horse but is incredibly active and works it off.

So a chubby baby will not necessarily turn into a chubby child or adult, and a child's weight will not always mirror their parents'.

gorionine · 17/11/2010 08:17

Yes, I am afraid you are really being unreasonable and yes again you are being very offensive.

"There are more and more overweight children. This will lead to ill health for them. It's not their fault as they are children. Adults are not taking responisbility. No need to be defensive."

I totally desagree with you Riven (I think that is a once in a lifetime occurence). Whilst there is a need to address obesity in children, there is no need to blame only obese parents for it, I am obese my parents are not (I "abused" my body at a time in my life I was very depressed and my dcs are definitely not and there are several very skinny parents in school with overweight children. OP suggest that all obese parents overfeed their dcs (she goes back on it later but this is definitelty what her OP suggests).

gorionine · 17/11/2010 08:21

Sorry post missing a few ) and , and does not make much sense. here is the more understandable version :

I totally desagree with you Riven (I think that is a once in a lifetime occurence). Whilst there is a need to address obesity in children, there is no need to blame only obese parents for it, I am obese my parents are not and my dcs are definitely not (I "abused" my body at a time in my life I was very depressed). I know very skinny parents in school with overweight children. OP suggest that all obese parents overfeed their dcs (she goes back on it later but this is definitelty what her OP suggests) and this is really not a "rule".

LittlebearH · 17/11/2010 08:26

Gorionine
I am not going back on it.
I know it was possible so sound like I am being judgy but the women I saw I wondered if they were overfeeding. I did not mean all fat people in general.

And I mention my DD is small...yet I dont underfeed her.

So is it a coincidence...? Just dont understand why they wean them so early if they are big already.

OP posts:
sarah293 · 17/11/2010 08:26

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

QOD · 17/11/2010 08:32

Fattest kid I Know is now 9st 8 (was 10st but her mum has put her on a diet) - she is 10

Grossly overweight - her mum is 5ft 6 and under 7 stone - blows your theory out of the water.

sarah293 · 17/11/2010 08:32

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

TattyDevine · 17/11/2010 08:38

So many people do just assume a chunky mum will be overfeeding.

I manage my weight pretty well when I'm not pregnant but I've never had a a newborn/young baby in my arms whilst slim as I always have 2 stone of babyweight to lose and I like to do it gradually.

When I went to my GP over and over with my son's reflux, I had a great deal of trouble trying to convince them I was not overfeeding him.

"Are you overfeeding him?". "I'm feeding him on demand like we are encouraged to do". Cue suspicious look from the GP. "Try feeding him less and see if he stops vomiting". "How do you feed a baby less? Rip them off mid suck?

With my absolutely roly poly daughter I'd get it from the health visitor. "Are you overfeeding her?" "I'm feeding her on demand like we are encouraged to do". "Feed her less". "But she's quite hungry at the moment. If I feed her less she'll be unsettled. Do you think I should offer her some solids instead? (less calories than milk and 5 months old at this stage). "Good grief no! If she's hungry, feed her more milk!"

Errrr... Hmm

TheFeministParent · 17/11/2010 08:39

QOD Wed 17-Nov-10 08:32:34
Fattest kid I Know is now 9st 8 (was 10st but her mum has put her on a diet) - she is 10

Grossly overweight - her mum is 5ft 6 and under 7 stone - blows your theory out of the water.

No it doesn't. I know a man who lived for forty years with one kidney, drank three bottles of whiskey a week and smoked 20 cigarettes a day, lived 'til he was 104 years....doesn't mean smoking and drinking isn't harmful;.

mixedraceparents · 17/11/2010 08:39

One of my kids was born big and has stayed big and one was born skinny and has stayed skinny. They eat the same amount!

QuintessentialShadows · 17/11/2010 08:40

I will not forget a woman in our local nhs ante natal group. We had taken our babies (3/4 month olds) to the park for them to lie on blankets and kick and just be while we sipped coffees and chatted. One woman, tall and slim, told us proudly she had started halving the amount of formula mixed in her baby girls bottles, because she did not want her to develop so many fat deposits, as this would cause her to be fat when she grew up.

I am sure fat mothers can somehow be blamed for this, too... Hmm

gobbledegoop · 17/11/2010 08:57

Yes, blame the fatties for everything Wink

TattyDevine · 17/11/2010 09:26

"Just dont understand why they wean them so early if they are big already"

LittlebearH

The reason parents of big chunky (FAT!) babies are sometimes advised to wean early is that if a baby is not able to be satisfied on milk, they will take in more calories from that milk than they would if they were having some solids as well.

A 250ml (9oz) carton of SMA first milk is 167.5 calories. A typically "hungry" baby can drink one of these every 2-3 hours, day and night. This would provide a whopping 1336 calories a day, which is more than half of what an adult woman requires in a day.

Its 52 calories for a serving of baby rice made up with formula milk. So about 1/3 of the calories of giving them yet another bottle of milk (or breastfeed, if they are breastfed). Do this twice a day and you've already saved 200 calories. But what you might also find is that those 2 meals of baby rice will take longer to digest and provide bulk and fullness in the baby's tummy, allowing them to go from 8 or 9 bottles a day down to, perhaps, 5, which is more in line with the back of the formula tin and what other babies would be having.

This will help level out the baby's weight gain and make them more happy and settled.

I'm not advocating early weaning, just explaining why some HV's and GP's will advise it in situations where the child is already large and seems hungry and unsatisfied.

I have known babies where just a few spoons of baby rice and they are a different baby in terms of satisfaction and milk consumption.

Does that make more sense?

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