To be despairing of teen girls particularly nowadays....

[Mowiol]

Don't get me wrong...... I think general standards have dropped across the board from the days when I was young so bear with me.... please!! After all, I'm quite old and a Grandma!!

I am a teacher and I am constantly non-plussed at the swearing/burping/farting/discussion of drinking habits/sex etc. amongst girls nowadays. Being discreet or remotely lady-like seems to be anathema nowadays.

I'm most definitely NOT saying that I accept any of that from boys, but it saddens me that girls in particular seem to have no decorum nowadays - for example they discuss periods etc. in front of boys, and I'm afraid I came from the generation where you would have died before mentioning that in front of a boy!!

And these are 13-14 year olds - I remember my Mum and Dad taking a very dim view of youngsters (of either sex) being out beyond 8-9pm on a school night or having "boyfriends and girlfriends" at that age. I was very conscious that they were highly disapproving of shenanigans at that age.

Am I a silly old-fashioned woman??

I agree with the OP that swearing, burping etc are not particularly pleasant habits in teenagers.

But like others I do really resent the idea that girls should be held up to some 'higher' standard of behaviour- they should be 'ladylike' while boys can just be boys. Exactly the same standards of behaviour should be expected from everyone. And I think it's a very good thing that teens feel they can discuss issues around puberty/sexual health etc with each other. I just wish that we could get to a time when they could also be free to say things like 'No, I haven't had sex yet and I'd rather wait a while.' That would be real progress.

"And I am absolutely not sexist and favouring boys- but I do think a fair few girls are in danger of becoming too "laddish" nowadays."

But this is being sexist. Unless of course you meant to say that 'laddish' culture is a bad thing for both boys and girls, but in that case why didn't you say so?

OK pozzled I see what you mean - I don't like laddish/loutish behaviour in boys either.

Think I'll just slink off now - I've managed to confuse even myself.

Was it his dick hanging out of his trousers?

Did you bother to look to see if this boy was exposing himself?

Instead of complaining about the dropping standards of behavior in girls, why aren't you complaining about the lack of success in raisning the behavioral standards of boys?

Girls are still better behaved than boys - yet all the focus is on their behavior.

Actually dittany I think you'll find colditz's last question was mine

I work with a 19 year old who has recently suffered from thrush.
She told us all the intimate details about her 'foo' and I felt as if I lived every minute with her.
I thought it was strange she would share such intimate details with her work colleagues, but each to their own.
Society is different, thank god, to when I was a teenager.

dittany - you're right, my fingers ran ahead of my brain in this case.

I think colditz is spot on actually - sort of turning the argument on it's head.

Hmmm - I think I should really just have been moaning about all crude and loutish behaviour and not just highlighting in terms of the girls.

I suppose I just came on here last night and ranted after a long week - sometimes trying to setlle a challenging class group can be a bit like knitting fog.

tethersend did indeed make the point before me.

(I know how VERY annoying it is for this to happen, tetherend)

Generally I don't like coarse behaviour in men or women standards/expectations should be raised for both..

Thanks dittany - thing is I love teaching and sometimes the most challenging groups are also the most rewarding when you make a breakthrough, however small!

cheers colditz.

I'm having a needy day today

it's not news that it's cool to be thick. every teacher knows that and spends their life fighting against it. it's more the "My sole function is to be decorative, my nails and hair are my life don't ask me to be competent at anything" that annoys me. Was it Pink or anastacia that satirised that in "Stupid Girl"?

Just checked. It was Pink. Here's a Pink Link that demonstrates what I mean.

I am concerned that teachers think it impossible for girls to care about nails/hair and be competent at anything. The two things are not mutually exclusive.

YANBU it seems like girls just need to prove they are as tough and hard etc as some boys are. It always used to be male youths who were maniac drivers and now the females are proving themselves to be equally notorious.

Tattoos, swearing, spitting - aaaargh...what's the world coming to (sounding more and more like my mother every day!)

Oh dear.

tethersend - no it's not impossible for girls to be interested in hair/make-up AND be good at things but my bug-bear is when I have to stop them applying it/admiring the results in mirrors during lessons when they are meant to be learning.

Make-up isn't a big thing in itself but they could at least not be putting it on during class.

Not even going to mention mobiles...........

Moola I agree with you on spitting and swearing it is disgusting from both sexes but what is wrong with tattoos? Why does having body art make you common? My tattooist is covered head to toe in them and is one of the most intelligent compassionate articulate and creative people I have met . Periods are a natural thing and it can only be a good thing if girls feel they can discuss them freely I think it is pathetic and so does my dh when a man recoils in disgust whenever the word period is mentioned I do not agree with the term ladylike as it goes hand in hand with quiet and submissive , I am boisterous love cars getting dirty motorbikes ,in my youth I would play football rollerblade climb trees etc not because I wanted to be a boy but because it was fun I would not however swear fart or burp for the sake of humour , I am interested in What the op deems ladylike because I could be wrong in my interpretation of it

Mowiol, I hear you and I feel your pain! Of course there is nothing wrong with caring how you look. What troubles me is when this becomes an all consuming passion and it becomes more important than learning anything, developing strength of character (an old fashioned concept but still a valid one) or even common courtesy. When a Y7 girl tells you that she has not been swimming in two years as she cannot get her hair wet or wash off her make up, then there's a problem! One school in Scotland was so sick of girls crying off PE in case they ruined their hair that they bought hair straighteners!
news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/scotland/glasgow_and_west/8260716.stm