to ban DH from pooing in the hotel room?

[quicksand]

DH thinks so, I disagree.

In Thailand (on honeymoon!), 'design hotel' for part of the trip - very nice but there wasn't a proper bathroom door, sort of curvy glass everywhere. The toilet was discretely tucked out of sight but not fully enclosed in anything.

DH's poo is soooo stinky and he's one of those lucky people who craps at least once a day. I'm really not so perhaps I have unrealistic expecations BUT after a day of being gassed while in bed (killed the honeymoon mood), asked DH to go to the lobby area when he had to crap and poo in the loo there instead.

He agreed as even he could appreciate that the unaccustomed cuisine was having an effect. It was great!

HOWEVER I have now extended this request to all hotel stays, which DH says is freakish and bizarre. If he has to go then fine, okay, I'll cope, ditto if we're heading out or there's a window we can open safely or whatever but there have been times I've said "please don't shit in the bathroom unless you have to" - always teeny tiny hotel rooms or places the windows aren't usable - and it is becoming A Thing.

On the James May programme this evening they said something about women never pooing on holiday and DH made an arch comment about my poo ban and said nobody in their right mind would do what I do soooo...

AIBU?

There seems to be some misapprehension - DH is allowed to crap, of course. I'd just rather he did it in the (usually lovely, plush and nearby), 'general' hotel loos rather than the one in our room. And of course I poo - but when in close quarters with people I try to poo considerately.

merrymonsters the shit itself flushes away, sure. The SMELL does not and lingers like nothing on earth including ancient nappies under the bed, dead mice behind the fridge etc etc.

It probably is poo envy TheBolter - I don't poo every day! - But if I left the room it would stink when I came back (if I was just leaving so he could poo and we'd otherwise be in the room). It's usually just before bed and who wants to sleep in a smelly room?

Oh I hate those ponce hotels with curved glass instead of a decent door and extractor fan, like that is too un-designery or summat.

Bathrooms should have decent doors and decent fans.

And... they should be bloody sound proof too!

Alibabaandthe40nappies sadly our house is always stinky. It's like something out of Sarah Beeney's latest programme.

Perhaps I am trying to keep hotel experiences pristine and 'other' and utterly unlike home?

YANBU

I base all my hotel choices on WC's.

Best so far was the one in France that had windows and shutters so you could leave the window open to get rid of smells but had privacy.

I have a huge problem just before I have a period when I poo a lot. It's not just the smell but "noise". Yuck not good on a romantic holiday. DP takes DS to breakfast first so I can go in private.

It's worse if one of you is discreet and the other...well isn't.

Poor man - that is just cruel OP.

YABU sorry.

Take some air refreshener or smelly candles with you.

They are not being precious edam!

DH is definitely banned from using macerator toilets, and that isn't me being controlling, it is a public health measure.

DeborahDeborah I am postively gung ho about shit, but clearly not in hotel rooms! DH doesn't have a complex at all, he thinks I am a total loon and ridicules me instead ;)

He will be delighted so many people think IABU. I maintain the toenail thing is worse though.

YANBU. I am lucky in that my DP needs some kind of primitive isolation to feel safe enough to poo, so if we're just staying in a room with an ensuite he tends to slink off to alternative premises anyway, or says meaningfully 'You go on ahead, I'll catch up'.

TheFallen, next time there's a list asking 'what have you learned from MN' I am definitely going to put 'never poo in a macerator loo' and credit you as the tipster.

"but when in close quarters with people I try to poo considerately."

OP, how does one poo considerately? Seriously, I want to know!

YABU although I do sympathise. DH is a bit on a stinker, but I hate hate hate pooing in a public loo, so the concept of being poo-policed whilst on holiday so that I had to leave the privacy of my hotel room and sit on a loo with neighbouring cubicles where people can here everything, is a non-starter for me.

YABVU - it's totally liberating to be able to shit anywhere at anytime. My Dh has been known to come all the way home to shit as he has an aversion to doing it outside the home. I thank my stints backbacking, sharing loos, having to go outside in fields with your workmates looking on. Now I literally don't give a shit and just get on with it.

SlightlyJaded considerate pooing - okay - when staying in a caravan with 2 other couples I shat in the restaurant loo (one of those holiday park things).

Ditto Butlins chalet for ATP, go elsewhere if possible. Not if it's raining or 3am or 'going elsewhere' would mean digging a pit in the mud outside but if sharing with people I'm not related to I try not to poo in the room.

If it's all of us somewhere (DH, me and the DCs), I don't care so much. But when it's just the two of us I do!

holding it in is very bad for you, you know. I have that on the authority of the Bowel and Bladder Federation.

All you uptight people will come to a bad end, you know.

YABU when you have got to go you have got to go.

I feel your pain but if he needs to go he needs to go.....such is life and poo [it stinks]

OK yes, fair enough, I probably practice 'considerate pooing' on that basis...

what???
Are you having a laugh?
You have requested your husband does not crap in the ensuite bathroom in hotels? You actually SAID that to him ?

That's barking mad and extremely controlling

YABU. Do you admit to being a control freak ?

YANBU! Tell him to take anti-diarrheals or co-cocodamol before going to a hotel.

GAG.

If my husband told me my shit stank too much for me to use the ensuite , would I please go elsewhere , I would be most annoyed

On the day we moved out from our previous house, the one where we had first lived as a married couple, brought home our babies, enjoyed many happy times etc.. blah-di-blah, DH and I were standing in the empty sitting room, arm-in-arm, quietly remembering.

The mood was totally shattered when he let drop the most vile fart you've ever experienced in your life! I'm sure it must still have been hanging in the air when the new owners arrived. Nice.

clam my DP broke the ice that way after a tense emotional conversation late last night. It was quite effective tbh.

LOL at considerate poos.

I don't see the problem. DH has a very efficient anti-smelly poo technique - as soon as the poo hits the water, flush. Whether finished or not. With every subsequent emission, flush again. Lots of mini flushes, finishing after the big clean up.

Because the poo does not hang around in the bowl till he is finished, it generally does not smell.

If it does then striking a match helps immensely.

HTH.